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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

How would you have handled this near death experience?

44 replies

LadyClaudette · 18/09/2017 13:42

Maybe slightly dramatic title, but still scary! DH has been driving a good few years and in this time has made long journeys, been on motorways, etc... He considers himself a good and confident driver.

On a single, national speed carriageway today, a motorbike in front of him (whilst I was a passenger) slowed down to 20mph. No reason for it. I presume a motorbike would have hazard lights if something was wrong? And he also passed a road leading off the carriageway if he needed to turn off due to an issue.

This continues for thirty seconds or so and he did not speed up. The cars behind us were getting nearer so DH went to overtake motorbike.

It was a strip of straight road, plenty of overtaking space. He began to overtake- then the guy on the motorbike decided to gun his engine and go up to about 60mph as we were alongside him!

So DH was now on the wrong side of the road, going 60mph, and unable to drop back as the car behind us originally had caught up...

Motorbike still didn't slow down!

In the end DH had to speed past 60mph up to about 80mph to finish overtaking. All the time I was terrified of a car coming in the opposite direction.

So AIBU to ask what you would have done here?

DH is mortified and wonders what he should have done. I haven't been driving as long so don't really know what of it!

OP posts:
dArtagnansCrumpet · 18/09/2017 13:45

Sounds like the motorcyclist wanted that to happen. Sounds horrific.

minionsrule · 18/09/2017 13:45

I would have slowed vack down hoping the car behind would let you back in. Oh and flick the biker the V, what a prat. Had your dh done anything to wind him up beforehand? Not that it excuses such behaviour

Chickpearocker · 18/09/2017 13:45

I would have speeded up to get back in the lane as to not meet incoming traffic. This has happened me a few times but in both cases I misjudged how much time I had to overtake leaving me unable to drop back but yet meeting a car head on. In that case you have to put your foot down and go for it!

TacoFlavouredKisses · 18/09/2017 13:46

People like that motorcyclist are why I bought a dash cam. Scary and I agree with pp - it sounds like he was baiting you.

ethelfleda · 18/09/2017 13:47

Sounds like that was deliberate on the motorcyclist' s part! Arse. Gives sensible riders a bad name!

Sausagerollers · 18/09/2017 13:48

Clearly neither of you know much about motorbike riding. What's nothing to a car, say an empty crisp packet on the ground, can be a huge hazard to a bike if it whips up into the air and flies into the biker's helmet for example.
In this instance I would have been less impatient and given the biker more than 30 seconds to get over whatever had happened to cause him to slow down.
If there's clearly been some kind of incident which causes another drive to brake suddenly, that's really not the time to try and overtake.

PoppyPopcorn · 18/09/2017 13:48

Motorcylist was a prick. But that's not a "near death experience".

MyBrilliantDisguise · 18/09/2017 13:48

It does sound like he was baiting you - it must have been terrifying.

Birdsgottafly · 18/09/2017 13:49

The Motorbike has done it deliberately.

However your DH should have waited a lot longer to try to overtake and if the Motorbike carried on at that speed, you could have made a phone call to the traffic Police.

The cars catching up could have slowed down and you don't let anyone influence your driving.

arethereanyleftatall · 18/09/2017 13:50

Was your dh tailgating?

BusterGonad · 18/09/2017 13:50

Definitely not a near death experience, just a lack of judgement on your husbands part and god only knows what caused the motor biker to slow down?

streetface · 18/09/2017 13:52

I would have dropped right back when the bike slowed down. If after ages it still hadn't moved I would have slowly moved out when safe but if it had sped up I would have dropped back and forced the car behind me to slow.

Better to be rear-ended than face a head-on collision.

LadyClaudette · 18/09/2017 13:54

Sorry original post wasn't clear, motorbike WAS going at about 20mph for thirty seconds but prior to this he had been going 60mph,
slowed down to about 40mph for two minutes, went thirty mph for a few more minutes and then twenty mph for thirty seconds.
He gradually slowed down over about five minutes but when it got to 20mph DH thought it was getting ridiculous. DH only decided to overtake when the guy got to 20mph and then it really was just too slow, and that was when he reached the clear long stretch.

We could also see ahead and it was clear, so we were not worried about an obstacle in front of motorbike rider.

I didn't think about baiting he did gun engine very loudly and dramatically.

OP posts:
invictusGames · 18/09/2017 13:56

I'd have slowed down. To a stop if necessary. The car behind would have had to too but that's better than a collision with oncoming traffic.

Surely your husband knows this?

We have quick cars and I ride a motorbike too. There are few cars on the road that could overtake me if I didn't want them to so your husband entering a race was idiotic. The motorbike could likely have easily stayed level inside you.

The bike rider was goading and got a reaction. I would put money on them thinking they were being tailgated.

LadyClaudette · 18/09/2017 13:56

Sorry the near death bit is dramatic but the car in the distance on our side that we saw was very scary and a few more seconds and maybe we wouldn't have made it back safely to the right side of the road!

OP posts:
MarklahMarklah · 18/09/2017 13:59

I'd have continued to stay behind the motorcyclist for a good few minutes to allow whatever had caused him/her to slow down had rectified itself.

However, it is possible that they were doing it deliberately for some reason. This is why we have a dashcam. The bike should have slowed allowed you to overtake.

arethereanyleftatall · 18/09/2017 14:01

Sounds like the motorbike did this on purpose. There's two possibilities reasons why. Either the motorbike rider is a baddie trying to cause an accident, or your dh was driving appallingly (possibly tailgating possibly something else) and he was trying to teach him a lesson.

Firesuit · 18/09/2017 14:02

so your husband entering a race was idiotic

Anyone overtaking a slower vehicle should assume the other person wants to race you and will speed up to prevent you returning to your side of the road? I've been driving more than 30 years, during which time I've occasionally overtaken people on single lane roads, and that has never happened to me, as far as I can remember.

lljkk · 18/09/2017 14:06

So DH was now on the wrong side of the road, going 60mph, and unable to drop back as the car behind us originally had caught up...

Am I the only one thinking that car behind could have eased off to make it possible for OP's car to pull back in? I'm well cautious about other people's overtaking.

I think what OP's DH did is what I'd do, and that her DH was generally reasonable.
I'm betting the M-Bike got a phone call is why slow down to 20mph (sigh).

Talkietalk · 18/09/2017 14:11

Ive seen cars and trucks do this but never a motorcyclist. My reaction is to drop back and re-enter behind the stupid vehicle. Comes of experience. You husband was right to be afraid of a oncoming crash and should drop back in future.

Its not a race.

LadyClaudette · 18/09/2017 14:12

DH wasn't close to the bike, if anything he gave it plenty of space as obviously a vehicle going that slow is something to be wary of

OP posts:
KurriKurri · 18/09/2017 14:13

I'd say the decision to overtake a vehicle doing 20mph on a NSL road is the ocrrect one (assuming normal safe overtaking conditions) otherwise the cars behind are going to get impatient and will start trying to overtake 2 or 3 vehicles - creating a much more dangerous situation.

The motorbiker is the person driving dangerously here not your DH OP. But yes others driving weirdly and unpredicatbly is scary. Don;t think your Dh should feel mortified - I think he took a justifiable decision under the circs. he was unfortunate that he came across a complete twerp on the road.

Mummyoflittledragon · 18/09/2017 14:14

The motorcyclist was clearly looking to scare you. I wouldn't have sped up. I would have slowed down and expected the car behind to let me back in. The driver behind will have been well aware of the erratic motorcyclist driving. It is much too dangerous to race a motorcycle as they will always win as the power available is greater thus 0-60 is much faster.

Did your dh accidentally get too close to the bike just before the incident?

SlothMama · 18/09/2017 14:15

OP you are being a bit dramatic it really wasn't a near death experience, however these situations are exactly why I have a dashcam. Could have reported him to the Police and submit the footage as evidence

HerOtherHalf · 18/09/2017 14:15

Too many unknowns to explain the biker's behaviour but even if the OP's husband had been tailgating, two wrongs do not make a right. Personally, had I been your husband and a car had appeared at speed coming the other way, very last resort would be the biker taking the hit from the side of my car. Not as an act of revenge but simply a better option than a head-on collision between two cars.

I've been tailgated a few times and the best thing to do in the interests of personal safety is park your ego and let the muppet behind you past as soon as possible.

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