To think that the school cannot enforce this uniform rule?

[ReanimatedSGB]

DS started back at school on Friday and has come home with an annoying student handbook full of various pissy instructions and threats of hour-long detentions.
One thing I noticed was that 'boys' hair must be no longer than collar length. DS has long hair. While I completely understand a regulation that long hair must be tied back for school, isn't it actually illegal for them to insist that boys can't have long hair? IE sex discrimination?

So how do we get people to
see past that. These threads are bloody scary witg the amount if things people justify on account of "rules"

Parents are ripped to shreds over how they and their kids are all that's wrong with the world even when previously approved items overnight become contraband and people aren't taking the next day off work and spending money they may not have on another item.

Some of whatst been happening is atrocious. Lined up in the rain while skirts are measured and labels checked for the right stockists.kids swnt home because no one thought to make the regulation skirts cone in multiple lengths and ergo too short on tall kids.

Blazers not able to be removed in 30 degree heat.

And still people are all "rules are rulez home scoll of you don't like it"

Just what do schools have to do before people say "actually, no"

Start insisting on female pupils going on the pill to stop them dropping out pregnant?

Keep boys in at breaks sonthey stay away from.girls?

Raiding houses to check for gangsta rap or heavy metal cds?

Every year we get parents whingeing about school rules. They really are not that bad.

Really?

You would be happy your dc can't wear coats to school in the snow?

You'd be happy that your kids had to faint in classrooms rather than remove a blazer?

Your happy that you face detentions when suppliers don't deliver the kit you ordered in plenty of time?

Unfortunately, school rules are rules to be adhered to. It teaches the children that there are boundaries and that they need to conform. They will have rules throughout their life that they may not particularly like, but they'll still have to adhere to them and this is the first step.
All too often in the media/news, there are stories of parents backing up their children to break school rules. Isn't it about time we, as parents, teach our children that rules must be obeyed (regardless of whether we like them or not)? It's a free society, if an alternative school has rules that you prefer, no one is stopping your child from moving.
What happens when all these children get to adulthood and decide 'I don't like rules that the police enforce, I'll just ignore them, and my parents will probably back me up'?
If you really think the rule is not enforced or is out-dated, maybe have a quiet discussion with the headteacher or your elected parent-governor to see if the rule can be clarified or removed? Possibly a little bit more constructive than going to the school all-guns-blazin'.

It's also, frankly, no longer true (if it ever was) that teachers and schools put children's best interest first. Yes, there are many, many dedicated teaching staff at all levels who care about, support, encourage and educate their pupils. But there are also inadequates who go into teaching because they like the idea of having power over others. There are lazy time-servers who went into education because of the long holidays. And there are all too many of these fuckers who set up academies and 'free' schools whose main motivation is to line their own pockets, and they are quite happy to play to the awful Daily Mail idea that cowed, terrorized children in out-of-date, expensive, uncomfortable uniforms make for a 'good' school.

@ReanimatedSGB

What a hideous opinion you have of schools and teaching staff. If this opinion is based on your experience, I really would suggest you get your child moved from such a school. Thankfully, this is not the norm with most schools. The children are at the forefront of teaching staffs lives, and they have to juggle that whilst having government-inflicted restraints on them (such as budget cuts, curriculum changes etc)

Sigh. So many 'rules is rules' people on here.

Sigh. So many we don't like rules people on here.

@danni1979, it’s really sad to see so many ‘rules are rules’ people. And also, as said a billion times, no, for most people there is no choice of school – it beggars belief how many still come up with the “choose another school” line.

Challenging capricious rules which serve no purpose whatsoever has nothing to do with spoiling a child. You can accept these rules and still spoil him; or you can loathe them and not spoil him.
In fact, I believe it can teach a child that he should reason with his own head, and never passively accept rules just because they are rules. If everyone had followed the ‘rules are rules’ mentality, we’d still live in the middle ages. How did dare people challenge corporal punishments? Rules are rules! (Thinking of other countries) how did people dare challenge racial segregation? Rules are rules! Etc…

Oh, and ever thought that the huge, huge disparity in uniform rules (and their enforcement) witnessed across the country maybe, just maybe, suggests that defining what an appropriate uniform code shall be is an extremely, extremely subjective matter?

Finally, could you please elaborate on how and why spending time checking for the right shade of grey in the rain is a good use of everyone’s time? It worries me not because I cannot buy that specific stupid trouser the school wants, but because it suggest the school does not focus on the right priorities.

@gottagetmoving, same question to you: could you please elaborate on how and why spending time checking for the right shade of grey in the rain is a good use of everyone’s time? The silence of the ‘rules are rules’ brigade on this point is, well, deafening!

I'd quite happily have no uniform at all. However I am comfortable to ensure that my DS comply with the policy as it is fairly reasonable and outside school hours they can wear what they like. Enforcing hair cuts however also impacts the 139+ hours they are out of school as well as the 30+ hours they are in school. That is unreasonable as you are asking for compliance with school rules when they aren't in school.

I noticed that dds latest school uniform list(and why are they given out after they're back to school) has missed out skirts.
DD recons it's because there has been a craze at her school for tight skirts which look reasonably smart especially as the girls are beginning to wear the non compulsory blazers(or jackets at least).Behavior is great at her school so she thinks it's a case of don't rock the boat.

Sigh. So many we don't like rules people on here

Nope. Only people who don't like stupid pointless rules that benefit no-one and simply give incompetent headteachers the excuse to do a bit of willy-waving.

same question to you: could you please elaborate on how and why spending time checking for the right shade of grey in the rain is a good use of everyone’s time?

I don't think it's good use of anyone's time. There are lots of things people have to do that's not a good use of their time.
There is nothing wrong in insisting on a particular shade of grey for a uniform, however, if it is insisted upon, the school should have a list of stockists for you. Where do all the other parents get them?

@Gotta

So of your dc had a 1.5 mile walk to school and school would not allow coats on the premesis would you accept that rule even though that meant your dd1 froze in winter and came home crying with cold?

Even thought he teachers all standing at the gates checking for coats were WEARING COATS?

So of your dc had a 1.5 mile walk to school and school would not allow coats on the premesis would you accept that rule even though that meant your dd1 froze in winter and came home crying with cold?

I must have missed something, sorry,...What school doesn't allow coats? Do you mean particular kinds of coats?
If a school did in fact ban coats, they would probably be taken to court?

There have been a few people on other threads who have reported their kids being unable to wear any kind of coat.

Kids sent home for non regulation trousers BUT the suppliers failed to deliver on time

And many other examples

And still people like you come along saying "rules are rules"

@gotta, Well, like I said, I think the correct teaching that we, as parents can and should try to convey to a child is neither ‘rules are rules, switch off your brain and shut up’ nor ‘no rule should apply to you, my precious snowflake’, but a sensible compromise between these two extremes. I don’t want a spoilt brat but I also don’t want an obedient, brainless zombie.

Life is full of stuff we may not like and/or find incredibly useless or counterproductive. It’s important to choose your battles. It’s important to appreciate that you won’t always get what you want. But it’s also important not to switch off your brain and passively accept that ‘rules are rules’.

Wrt to the grey trousers, my gripe is not that I cannot buy them, but that checking for the right shade of grey is a sign of the school having the wrong priorities. Or, shall I say, I am lucky enough that I can buy them without batting an eyelid, but not all families are so lucky: shocking horror for some people on the forum, but there exist people poorer than us and/or with multiple kids, who wouldn’t mind saving a few quids on school uniforms. Why shouldn’t Johnnie be able to use Billie’s grey trousers, just because they went to different schools or the uniform has changed, and Billie’s grey is now the wrong grey?

Not to mention @giles’ example of other situations where the school uniform is simply inadequate for the weather conditions (why freeze in the winter or boil in the summer?).

In fact someone even said on another thread that a school attempted to send a kid home until she got a black plaster cast put on.

Are you also in favour of regulating hair elastic colours for example.

@SouthLondon
I take your point. Some schools are more relaxed and some are very strict about these policies.
If enough parents get together they can get the more petty rules changed surely? A school cannot ignore everyone. As for rules that you believe can affect a child's health, then that has to be taken down a legal route if the school won't listen to concerns or change the rule.

If enough parents get together they can get the more petty rules changed surely? A school cannot ignore everyone

Don't you see that the trouble though. People like you seem to be all or nothing. And out of every thread like this one it is 95 percent ful of people who without question follow every single pedantic unnecessary rule and nearly will.probably continue to do so no matter how discriminatory it is.

How can one parent in one class change something that 95 percent of thousands if people (possibly millions on MN agree with

Don't you see that the trouble though. People like you seem to be all or nothing

People like me? Giles I don't moan about rules. I can understand why most are there. If there was a rule that seemed ridiculous or damaging I would do what I could to get it changed.
When people come together to change something they can get results.
If you have the attitude that there's no point because everyone else (as you think) is prepared to follow it, then no, you have no chance.

I remember at my school I wanted to shave my hair - rule was no shorter than a '4' as it wouldn't look smart otherwise. But the black kids all had hair shorter than that. Effectively it was racism.

But then there are more important issues to deal with in life.

To be fair by the time our secondary school kids get to the workplace it will be considered the norm for men to have long hair. I think it already is really. I mean it won't be the first time in history - stuart men often had long hair.

I think school's need to really think about their priorities and this isn't it but I think this trend towards stricter schools in general is going to continue for a while but will probably swing back at some point.

I live in a deprived area. Our school has just got a new head. My d niece's friend has been in detention every day for having the wrong shoes. Her mum can't afford to buy any others so she is effectively being punished for being poor.

I think it is actually cruel of schools to be so demanding of parents with regard to uniform given the current state of wages. I wonder how many children are missing out on essentials like food so their parents can buy expensive uniform. If a child is housed, fed, loved and encouraged they will succeed regardless of what they wore to school.