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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Not to give DC a snack on way home from school?

289 replies

chainedtothedesk · 06/09/2017 03:53

Quite happy to let them snack once we are home but my DD (9) has asked that I arrive at school gates to collect her with a snack. She's noticed other parents arrive with a snack and says she's hungry too at the end of the school day (often doesn't eat the fruit I give her for morning break though!) And doesnt want to wait the 15-20 min it takes to get her home. I suspect hunger doesn't come into it , she's just hoping she is more likely to get a bag of crisps or similar, rather than toast, if they eat on the way home rather than once we get there.
Today we saw a family eating a chocolate bar and small pother of Pringles on the way home which prompted the question (though not for the first time)
AIBU to make my DC just wait a little until they get home and suggest that they have something a bit healthier than chocolate and crisps?

OP posts:
ToffeeCake1 · 07/09/2017 18:16

If she's not eating her fruit at break can't she have that on the way home?

Blu99 · 07/09/2017 18:16

I picked up my niece a couple of times during the 'summer' with an ice lolly. I thought it would be nice after a long and sweaty day. She normally has a snack when she gets home.

nameofthellebore · 07/09/2017 18:19

I'm going to go against the grain here. I always arrive at school with snacks. I have two boys who are hungry all the time. My little one is like a bean pole and is going through a ravenous phase while my older ds doesn't seem to quite so hungry. I arrive with rice cakes, fruit, sandwich, tomatoes, water and sometimes something sweet on a Friday (there are no puddings at their school). They usually eat it all and then eat dinner and then I have to give them something before bed. Both boys have no extra body weight and are super active. It drives me round the bend but I remember the feeling of being so hungry as a kid I felt like I was going to faint. Grin so I just try and stay clear of too much junk. We have a 30 min walk home so it just means they are happier and less grumpy. If they didn't eat their meals I would stop though.

In short I would give her a couple of healthy snacks to munch on the way home.

Penygirl · 07/09/2017 18:19

The ice cream van parks on the main road by the school gates at my dd's school and I'm shocked by how many parents and grandparents buy ice creams for the children, yet moan about it being there! If they didn't buy anything it would soon stop coming there!
We only have a short walk home so snacks can wait until we get there.

noeffingidea · 07/09/2017 18:22

I never took a snack, though they did have an ice cream from the van sometimes. We only live 5 minutes away from the school though.
Generally I agree with not eating on the street, it's just something we don't do in our family. It doesn't bother me if other people do though.
If my kids had seen other children snacking after school and asked for something I would have just told them to wait until they got home.

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 07/09/2017 18:26

I didn't give the dses a snack in the way home from school as a regular thing, though I did occasionally get them a treat on the way home.

My first thought, when I read your OP, @chainedtothedesk, was 'why doesn't she eat the fruit she took for break time, if she's hungry after school?'

If I were you, I think I'd tell her that eating her piece of fruit at break time might help stave off the pangs of hunger later, and that should be her first step. Then I might say that there may be an occasional treat after school, but it isn't going to be a regular thing (unless you wanted to make it every Friday, or every other Friday, for example), and it won't happen if she carries on mithering for treats. And if she hasn't eaten her fruit, she can eat that on the way home.

livingthegoodlife · 07/09/2017 18:26

No snacks for my kids. They have their dinner at 5pm. They are terrible if I let them have any kind of snack they don't eat their dinner - at all! So just 3 meals a day here.

silky1985 · 07/09/2017 18:39

my children have never gotten a snack at the school gates, I wait until they are home and the amount of fat kids I see running off with there hands full of cookies is a disgrace. it will not harm your child if you do not become a sheep and not do what everyone else does.

TheFirstMrsDV · 07/09/2017 18:53

I have never taken snacks to school pick up but we can be home in 10 minutes so I don't need to.
If parents want to take their kids crisps or sweets Its up to them.

I will buy a lolly if its hot and their dad will sometimes get them something.

There is a line between Always V Never and Nutella smeared Haribo V rice cakes with quinoa paste.

(although not often on the internet admittedly)

TeaAndBisquits · 07/09/2017 18:58

I usually have an apple or carrot in my bag incase my DD asks for a snack on the way home.
If she doesn't, she'll have a slice of toast and butter it said fruit when we get in. We have dinner at 5.30/6pm

maudeismyfavouritepony · 07/09/2017 19:05

Wow, I'm a childminder and always give the kids a snack when they came out of school, a breadstick, piece of bagel or something like that. We often go to the park and I don't serve tea until 4.45pm.

I see many other parents giving biscuits, cakes, chocolate!

Believeitornot · 07/09/2017 19:09

I snack and my children snack if they need one.

I don't believe in making them so starving that they stuff their faces with a big meal.

Little and often.

I'm a size 8.

Pizzaexpressreview · 07/09/2017 19:17

tea as a meal at 4.45?!

kennycat · 07/09/2017 19:37

This drives me crackers! I children at pick up being given what I would class as a treat every single day. ( chocolate bar, crisp bag, sweets etc). Surely the very fact it's called a treat means it is a rarity, or have I got the definition wrong?!
Nobody rewards me for doing a day's work. Making it to the end of a school day is hardly praise-worthy is it?!

Fortunately my daughter has not asked yet- probably because there's not a cat in hell's chance I would bring her food for the three minute commute.
I don't even let her have the birthday sweets that come home seemingly every day. She can have a few with her snack at home or more often than not she's forgotten they exist by the time we get home.

Give your child the apple she hasn't eaten or make them wait till they get home. It's very unlikely that they will die of starvation in the interim.

Believeitornot · 07/09/2017 19:50

@kennycat

Who said it was a reward to give a hungry child a snack Hmm

TheFirstMrsDV · 07/09/2017 19:52

Oh I do love a food/child thread on MN
They are hilarious and terrifying in equal measure.

So, so, so many ishoos with food wrapped up as concern for healthy eating

Believeitornot · 07/09/2017 19:59

Well my view is if you're hungry, then eat something if it is not too close to a meal. Otherwise you can wait and not die.

If you do eat close to a meal, reduce portion size accordingly.

My dcs are very good at portion control and eating a sensible amount. They stop when they're full not when their plate is cleared.

pollymere · 07/09/2017 20:07

I'm not a huge believer in toast. I can see both sides though. Maybe bring breadsticks or carrot batons or similar that can be finished when dc get home?

Booboo66 · 07/09/2017 20:10

My DD 7 is starving when she finishes school. I always bring a snack as I remember also being starving and it wasn't a nice feeling. She is very slim but has a big appetite .. Always eats everything she's given though. i usually bring things like oatcakes, snack peppers or fruit but occasionally a treat of a croissant or crisps. Certainly not concerned about her become obese.

early30smum · 07/09/2017 20:14

There is a huge culture of afterschool snacks at our school. Most kids have biscuits, crisps etc. I take fruit, rice cakes or plain crackers and give them an early tea!

Ollivander84 · 07/09/2017 20:16

I'm 33 and had a snack after school, I remember the hunger! My dad used to joke I had worms because I would eat so much but I was 5ft 7 age 12
Breakfast, lunch, sandwich and fruit after school, go to the stables 3.30pm - 6pm then home for tea, probably have seconds, and pudding and supper Blush

kennycat · 07/09/2017 20:20

Sorry, believeitornot, I didnt explain my point very well. I was referring to giving sweet treats after school almost as a reward for getting through the day.
A healthy snack because the child is genuinely hungry or the journey home is long or whatever if a different kettle of fish and gives a more healthy message to the child about the purpose of food too in opinion.

SunshineLollipopsRainbows25 · 07/09/2017 20:26

my DD has asked the same in the past I've told her I'm not bringing snacks to school when we will be home in 20mins and not getting into that habit, I make tea as soon as we get home so I make her wait it's not unreasonable

Ginburee · 07/09/2017 20:36

I never had snacks after school but my children have always asked for food en route home.
We are in a lovely School and basically everyone has snacks ready. I take healthy snacks/fruit but we have parents who open big packs of sweets and give to the kids to share. And then get ice creams from the van on the way out.

ujerneyson · 07/09/2017 20:45

I always give my kids a snack after school, they're vile when they get out due to hunger and need food. School dinners are compulsary and I have no idea how much they eat. We drive home and the first thing they do when they get in the car is eat a bag of crisps. Then they're ready to be pleasant. So shoot me.

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