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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To want to leave ASAP

37 replies

Volchitsa · 05/09/2017 22:44

Having recently handed my notice in at my current job I'm starting to dread going to work!
Since handing my notice in the manager of the company has called me disloyal and told me how much money was wasted on the agency who brought me in. This made me pretty upset and I'm not quite sure I can last the notice period with this guy! He screams at me during phone calls yet when customers are present he is nice as pie.
He is the owner and so I feel there is little else I can do.AIBU to leave asap? don't feel I have many other options left but i'm starting to get anxiety the night before work not sure my nerves can last the notice period Sad

OP posts:
RooDaisy · 05/09/2017 22:45

I'd leave.

FenceSitter01 · 05/09/2017 22:46

Call your agency and say your position is untenable. Will you lose much money?

MyBrilliantDisguise · 05/09/2017 22:46

I think I'd give him one last chance and tell him that if he spoke to me like that again I'd leave immediately.

19lottie82 · 05/09/2017 22:46

Do you need a reference? If yes then stick it out and be sickly / ironically nice to him.

If not call in sick for the rest of your notice period. People will prob shoot me down for saying that but fuck it.

Purpleball · 05/09/2017 22:46

Do you need a reference from him? Can he be relied on to provide an honest one?
If either answer is no, then leave now

CleopatraCatLover · 05/09/2017 22:48

Go to GP and get signed off sick with anxiety for the duration. The owner is abusing you, you could also get in touch with ACAS or your union, if you're in one.

PeaPodPopper · 05/09/2017 22:48

If anyone screamed down the phone at me I'd just hang up - every time - as no salary in the world justifies being treated like that. And, if it's making you feel ill then go on the sick for the rest of the notice period. Life is too short to be bullied.

Threenme · 05/09/2017 22:49

Don't get anxious get mad! Ask him who the eff he thinks he's talking to. Record him screaming at you on your phone and in front of customers tell him you're glad he's calmed down after his outburst then play it them!

Original poster
Volchitsa · 05/09/2017 22:51

Thank you for all of your replies Smile I already have a reference from the company thankfully. I just do not want to let anyone else in my team down who are quite lovely. They seems to accept his behaviour as 'that's just him' Confused

OP posts:
Aquamarine1029 · 05/09/2017 22:53

Just ignore the idiot and don't be afraid to call him out on his abuse. If he's screaming at you on the phone, hang up. No wonder you're leaving.

42isthemeaning · 05/09/2017 22:54

Sorry, but he's a bully and his behaviour is totally unacceptable. Screw it. If it's making you ill and you can afford to just go, walk away.

Threenme · 05/09/2017 22:56

Have you told your family? What's their take?

5foot5 · 05/09/2017 23:06

Sounds grim, but can you comfort yourself with the fact it's not for long.

Out of interest, why are you leaving? Is it anything to do with his attitude? Even if it isn't it might be fun to plant the idea that it is. E.g. next time he screams at you try to stay calm and then say "Oh and you wonder why I am leaving!"

ShoesHaveSouls · 05/09/2017 23:07

You can call in sick.

I've had a number of awful jobs that I've left for pastures new. I've often wondered (in retrospect) why I stayed so long, and why I worked my notice so readily when they were being such utter bastards to me.

Kittychatcat · 05/09/2017 23:35

If you don't feel able to stand up to the bullying boss just don't go back. It's better that you feel relaxed and strong to start your new job rather than put up with any more abuse.

You could send your team an anti bullying book and some biscuits as an apology and parting gift.

Sparklesocks · 05/09/2017 23:38

How awful OP. Sounds like you made the right choice to leave! How long is your notice period, is it possible to stick out the remaining days? Would they let you leave earlier perhaps?

If it's causing genuine stress and anguish that is no way to live, don't hesitate to go to your GP if your health is being affected.

hotsouple · 06/09/2017 01:11

If they have seen his behavior they will understand a new team member leaving and will have seen it before. Don't feel too bad on that front.

tombstoneteeth · 06/09/2017 01:31

Constructive dismissal?

Italiangreyhound · 06/09/2017 02:00

How awful. I agree with PeaPodPopper "If anyone screamed down the phone at me I'd just hang up - every time."

If you do not feel able to do that you can just hold the phone away from your head and wait until he has finished. He sounds awful and ignorant.

Sorry, you will be gone soon, to a new, better, job. Thanks

AnUtterIdiot · 06/09/2017 04:12

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Argeles · 06/09/2017 05:09

Go to your Doctor and try your best to get sick leave for anxiety and workplace bullying.

idontwannaneedthem · 06/09/2017 05:10

Record him and play it to the agency.

SpiritedLondon · 06/09/2017 06:02

How long have you got left?

awifeyforlifey · 06/09/2017 06:15

"Go to GP and get signed off sick with anxiety for the duration."

^This. So much this. I had to leave a job once and my boss at the time actually used the word betrayal. Due to this and other factors, I started having panic attacks and ended up unable to work out my notice. I got a note from my GP and handed it in, no problems. Good luck!

FinallyDecidedOnUserName · 06/09/2017 06:32

If this is ongoing behaviour and the main reason you're leaving sue for constructive dismissal.