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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

People can't make decisions

36 replies

Ribrabrob · 04/09/2017 12:53

I work in a public service type role. Part of my role involves asking people a fairly simple, straightforward questions with two options. Both options have a slightly different process however the outcome is exactly the same and I always reiterate this, but some people seem to think it's the hardest question in the world!

They um, they ah, they bring their family over to discuss, some even phone a friend. Some people take aaaaaages to decide leaving a huge queue of people behind them.

It doesn't annoy me actually, but I must admit it does leave me a bit bemused and think about human nature and why we find decisions - even tiny ones - so hard. It's as though we aren't designed to like choice and when it's given to us, we freeze.

Aibu to think that a lot of people find decisions really hard? Aibu to set up a timer and give these people a time limit to decide Grin?

OP posts:
Original poster
Ribrabrob · 04/09/2017 12:53

Typo - it's only one question I ask them.

OP posts:
Puffpaw · 04/09/2017 12:58

People do find decisions hard, and they often don't make good choices when they do because their brains find it difficult.
If you want people to make faster decisions give them a third, bad option which is nothing like the other two. They will be faster at picking between the other two options. Read nudge and predictably irrational Smile

PresentlyTense · 04/09/2017 12:59

They're faffers. Bloody can't stand them!

brasty · 04/09/2017 12:59

Yes lots of people find making decisions hard. Its why they sit at the same place everyday at a training day. Make a decision once and then stick to it.
Capitalism sets us up to make lots of decisions all the time and yes it overwhelms lots of people.

GoldenOrb · 04/09/2017 13:02

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

PresentlyTense · 04/09/2017 13:03

That's why I like shopping at Aldi. Weeds out the faffersGrin

Dontlaugh · 04/09/2017 13:03

I feel your pain but if I've understood your post correctly the 2 options offered lead to the same outcome? If that's the case then why offer 2 options? Take the decision out of their hands.

5foot5 · 04/09/2017 13:05

I think in the example you give it is impossible to say whether YABU or not without knowing more about the question (possibly you can't, I understand)

For a start if, as you say, the outcome is the same whichever option they choose then why does a choice even exist? Maybe that is confusing them.

Is the question explained clearly enough? Does it contain any jargon or assume a level of knowledge about your service that the average person doesn't have?

5foot5 · 04/09/2017 13:05

x-post with Dontlaugh Grin

Letsgomaths · 04/09/2017 13:05

"It's just a blindfold!!!" quoth an exasperated mum.

I heard this when a stall holder at a "pin the tail" fete stall had several funny masks for the kids to choose from. They ummed and erred! And then they had to choose a prize as well... perhaps the stall holder offered too much choice.

KityGlitr · 04/09/2017 13:08

I'm curious, are you able to say what the question is or what they're having to decide between?

I admit I get frustrated with people like that who make a huge meal out of a simple decision, delaying everyone behind them. It just screams self centredness or lack of awareness about how it affects others who might not have all day to facilitate their huge decision making process!

Letsgomaths · 04/09/2017 13:13

I agree about capitalism forcing choice on us, some of it almost pointless, especially for things like electricity, insurance and so on. Wouldn't it be nice if we could just keep the same supplier and that's it! And there's the added complication that cheaper doesn't mean better.

Needalifeoverhaul · 04/09/2017 13:23

Ummm, I'm not sure if yabu or not....Grin

Glumglowworm · 04/09/2017 13:29

While I deeply sympathise with your frustration with faffers (I deal with plenty of them in my job too), I agree that it seems odd to have two ways of doing essentially the same thing. Which could be what is throwing them as it seems a bit like a trick question. But I do understand because in my job I often have to get customers to decide things that don't matter to them, but I'm not allowed to decide for them.

Anecdoche · 04/09/2017 13:36

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

brasty · 04/09/2017 13:37

The NHS is big on offering choice at the moment, but offers choice largely that most patients are unable to decide on. I was offered the choice between different physio providers, how am I supposed to know who to choose?

Agree that if the two choices lead to the same outcome, people probably think it is a trick question.

RebelRogue · 04/09/2017 17:26

I wonder if it's something like paying by DD or when the bill comes,pay something weekly or monthly etc where the "input" method differs but the outcome is the same.

Kitsandkids · 04/09/2017 17:40

My 9 year old takes ages to decide on purchases and then often puts back what he finally chooses in a last minute swap. I now sometimes pre-empt things by announcing as we go into a shop, 'you've got to the count of 20 to choose a drink/whatever or you'll end up with nothing. 1...2...3...' It might seem a bit mean but otherwise it takes him an absolute age! If we're in a cafe he often changes his mind just as I'm about to order which is exasperating!

Firesuit · 04/09/2017 18:15

If two options have exactly the same destination but different routes, surely that does make it harder to decide which is better? The more subtle the difference between two options the longer it takes you to get your head around?

sashh · 05/09/2017 06:54

In my previous life as a HCP people who

a) say yest to everything

b) try to give you the answer they think you want

a) I'm explaining a procedure to you, I want you to know what is happening and be able to do what I tell you later.

I'd through in the odd question you cannot answer yes/no to, such as, "and how did you get here today?"

b) You have yellow fingers and I can smell the smoke. I need to know how much you smoke and for how long, it's important for the results. I don't want you to lie and I'm not going to tell you off.

Neutrogena · 05/09/2017 06:58

Most of the UK are thick. Decisions pain them.

FaithAgain · 05/09/2017 07:04

We definitely have too many choices in life and it's not good for us. I found this TED talk on choices really interesting.

Maryof1993 · 05/09/2017 07:06

But if a decision is thrust upon someone with no notice, and they cannot do any research into their response, then how can they make a decision?

Maryof1993 · 05/09/2017 07:11

You have yellow fingers and I can smell the smoke. I need to know how much you smoke and for how long, it's important for the results. I don't want you to lie and I'm not going to tell you off.

But what's going to happen to the answer? I wouldn't trust the NHS with the information, therefore I will um and ar about the response I give, as I wouldn't believe the information I provide will only be used for the results. I would assume the information will be put into an unconsented database somewhere and be used for research or other healthcare staff would use the information for other purposes

sashh · 05/09/2017 07:18

Typo Throw not through