to ask WHERE he has put the WINE?

[whereohwherehasmylittledoggone]

DH has gone out. He had half a bottle of wine just before I got in but I cannot find the bottle anywhere. I've checked the recycling (in case he finished it) but it's not there, nor anywhere else I can think of. He hid it once before and it was behind a curtain...

Ideas?!

Noooooo I lost. The bottle has appeared in the recycling box this morning. It looks smaller than a standard bottle so I bet he drank it all before I got home, hence hiding it out of guilt

"it is kind of pointless"

em I assume that's re. my comment? I was referring to the fact that he hides it out of embarrassment/to keep the bottle to himself/pretend he's not had any or whatever but I can always tell i.e. smell it on his breath/he talks differently so it's pointless as a serious pursuit.

So he is an alcoholic and he's hiding it from you.

Why are there massive gaps between some user names and their posts...keep thinking they've not typed anything

kinky Perhaps your phone/computer isn't displaying properly? All the posts look fine from my end.

OP that's not a fun game of silly hide and seek between spouses, that's alcoholism and hiding the evidence

I agree. This doesn't sound like a fun game at all. You don't drink because it makes you feel sick but go to these extremes to find alcohol and he hides booze because he feels guilty? Doesn't seem like anyone is laughing or either of you enjoy this "game".

Whuch one of you is the alcoholic? Because it sounds like one of you is. He's not hiding the fact he's drinking, hes open about that, but he's hiding the alchohol. Is it you?

Wine bottles are generally a set size unless it's only a glass sized one (if you think that's a binge then your wrong) or he's developed a taste for dessert wine which is unlikely.

It all sounds very dysfunctional on both your parts.

Meh. I have to see it as a 'game' otherwise he drives me nuts with all the hiding and secrecy that is totally unnecessary. It is so stupid it's funny. I'm trying to stop him doing it! It seems that it's because he doesn't like me mentioning that he's downed yet another whole bottle of wine. I try not to say anything nowadays as it encourages more secrecy, but it just gets on my nerves at times. (It only happens maybe twice a week, on top of two pub visits with a friend. There are worse things to be bothered about, y'know?)

I don't know what a healthy amount to drink is because I come from a family of non-drinkers so even if I liked it probably wouldn't have it. I don't see the point of spending that much on something that's not even nice (imo). I've asked on forums before about amounts etc and generally the consensus was that the amounts he's drinking are ok/average, if slightly unhealthy. I see it as a waste of money which is why it's hard not to say anything (mostly because he's currently unemployed and I can only work part time).

littlebear Standard bottles are 750mls aren't they? this particular one was 500ml.

This is a very strange thread op. If you don't drink why did you answer that it was because you couldn't go out as the kids were in bed in response to the question on why you didn't just go and buy some.

The logical answer would be " oh I don't want to drink it, I'm tea total" , not " because I can't get out to do so".

Anyways, he doesn't sound like he has a problem, no, if he only drinks a couple of nights a week. And that is no explanation why he has to hide his bottles to the extent they are in the loft or he takes the empty with him then puts it in the recycling later. It's weird. I'm sorry but it is. You were desperate to find that wine last night.

Sorry bluntness, lol that's an age old habit from going out with friends when I was younger and everyone would question the fact that I didn't drink. Even more shocking is that I like to drink water... letting people assume it was vodka or something made life SO much easier Why it is (or was) a big deal that some people don't drink, I will never know...

Glad you don't think he has a drink problem, but agreed that it is weird that he hides everything. I don't get it either.

Drinking a bottle in a night
Being secretive about how much he drinks
Hiding the evidence

..... sure OP, sounds great

And regardless of the size of the bottle, did he do all of the above and then go out to drink more at the pub with his mate?

Is one of you going to be the grown-up and address this or are you both thinking this will be the way your relationship / family will 'function'