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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To not feed lunch at a kids birthday party?

93 replies

ginplease8383 · 30/08/2017 20:03

DD will be 3 in a month or so. I am considering having a village hall and bouncy castle from 2pm- 4pm.

AIBU to not serve food and just some cake and scones and some water/juice? DD eats at 12 and at 4. Which is what they do at nursery where a majority of the kids would be from.

OP posts:

mummmy2017 · 30/08/2017 21:26

If you buy only foods you will eat at home, you can take stuff home if no one eats it.
By making a sandwich for each person the kids can line up and choose, they love thinking they have a choose.

squiz81 · 30/08/2017 21:32

I did a party in a village hall this year. The hire was £40, bouncy castle £60 and Bluetooth speakers for music £20.

The party was 2-5 so I expected them to have lunch first. I then supplied cake, biscuits, crisps on a side table. People could help themselves when they wanted rather than a sit down meal.

We had about 35 kids attend, I never added it up but I must have spent £50-60 at least on them.

If you're on a budget I would definitely save this big kind of party for a few years time. 5 seems a popular age for it around here.

squiz81 · 30/08/2017 21:32

£50-60 on party bags that should have said.

dotdotdotmustdash · 30/08/2017 21:36

I did some parties for my DC when they were little. I always put on piles of savoury stuff - sandwiches and sausage rolls etc but we were always left with tons. Without fail the biggest hit was always a bowl of grapes, they absolutely loved them!

Allthewaves · 30/08/2017 21:46

Just add some crisps and fruit. There doesn't need to be loads of food

SendintheArdwolves · 30/08/2017 21:52

I have to echo all the other posters who are saying "don't go all out for a 3 year old's birthday".

Honestly, kids this age just get shy, overexcited, hangry, injured and then suddenly and overwhelmingly tired and teary and want to go home. Their parents have to hang around a village hall for a few hours when they've got shit to do in their limited weekend time, then take an emotional toddler home. And it's not like the birthday boy or girl even remembers parties at that age.

Plus, it sounds like you are on a budget with very tight margins - if you are concerned about spending more than twenty quid on food, then maybe a big party isn't the best use of your funds atm?

Ask yourself who you think will enjoy the party - it won't be the parents, and 3yo's mostly like pottering about with people they know not playing suddenly-important games with prizes in front of everyone. And I pretty sure you won't enjoy yourself much. Call me an old birthday grinch, but do yourself a favour and have a birthday tea in your house for your DD and invite whoever of her little friends has the funnest parents

4691IrradiatedHaggis · 30/08/2017 21:52

Been to loads of kids birthday parties, and there's always food provided. I obviously wouldn't mind if you didn't do food, but at a 2pm birthday party you really need to put it on the invite that there won't be any food as people will be expecting it and will probably have a light lunch in anticipation of party food a couple of hours later.

redmimi · 30/08/2017 21:53

We recently went to a party at a similar time and there was only cake on offer. I expected this as the invite said 'cake and fun provided' but not everyone had got the same message. The kids seem happy enough.

I agree cheaper to make your own food but if you did decide to order take a look at Morrisons food to order. So much cheaper than M and S!! I have recently used and just added my own crisps, sausage rolls and cake.

trappedinsuburbia · 30/08/2017 21:53

Last toddler party I was at there was sausage rolls, various sandwiches, little cakes, little bottles of water. I think there were strawberries and grapes, I can't remember. The food went down really well.
Can't remember what was in the party bags other than a bit of birthday cake, one of those balloons you put rice in to make a blooming noise and some stick to your teeth sweeties (that I ate).

milliemolliemou · 30/08/2017 21:55

Have you considered not having a party at all? Seriously - 3 years old is very young and the DC won't remember it.

So you're spending £80 on a village hall and (cheapest quoted here) 7.00 on food, £4 on trays and even more on party bags - plus organisation etc? Someone else quoted £200. This is just ludicrous.

Invite two or three of DC's friends around to your own home and have a few sandwiches/biscuits/cake/chopped veg and fruit (but for 5 not 20) and play party games for that age. No party bags. I've never seen ones that haven't got lost in the car on the way home even if with the royal Middleton imprint. Oh, except for baby torches/books/bulbs in pots

Or just have a lovely day with her by yourselves and take her to a film and tea out.

LellyMcKelly · 30/08/2017 22:07

I'm really lazy and don't bother with sandwiches. I just put out plates of ham, sliced up leerdamer type cheese, thinly sliced up French stick, cream crackers, cocktail sausages, crisps/cheese ball things, and lots of cucumber and carrot sticks, strawberries and grapes (halve those)jugs of water, black currant and orange squash. Go to Lidl and fill your boots for about £15. I gave up on party bags and went to Poundland and bought a bag of sweets for each kid.

LellyMcKelly · 30/08/2017 22:13

I also did one with just hot dogs if the place has a kitchen (the hot dogs need warmed up) but they are super easy and super cheap. Places like Asda do 12 hot dog buns for £1, and hot dogs are about £1 for 8. Add a bottle of ketchup and some party rings for a treat and you're home and dry for a tenner.

hannah1992 · 30/08/2017 22:18

For my dds parties it's always been sandwiches, a quiche cut into small servings (kids seem to love it), sausage rolls, bowl of crisps, and some cocktail sticks with cheese and pineapple on them.

Then in party bags I've always put a small thing of bubbles, a small chocolate bar a lolly, small haribos and cake

Always gone down well enough. TBH I find that most kids are too busy playing to eat very much. Dds last party my dh ended up taking a load of party food to eat at work the next day for lunch 😂

milliemolliemou · 30/08/2017 22:45

@hannah Love the vision of your DH taking cocktail pineapple/cheese thingees - and possibly the left over party bag with bubbles and haribos - to work. How did it go?

piefacedClique · 31/08/2017 07:34

I always write on the invitation that it will be a "play only party" and schedule it at not an obvious eating time..... I then have Cartons of juice/bottles of water and packets of crisps around if necessary.... the halls here are done by the hour so time is normally v tight

Xmasbaby11 · 31/08/2017 10:53

1.5 hours is more than enough. I agree 3 is young for a big party and many will struggle with games.

For dd' s 3rd birthday we had 15 kids at a play cafe and they did it all - free Play, simple games and food. We had the place yo ourselves, it was stress free and cost £120.

hannah1992 · 31/08/2017 10:55

Haha Millie he didn't take the party bags but I'm sure the bubbles would have gone down well if he had 😂. He did take left over sandwiches, cheese and pineapple sticks, sausage rolls though. He doesn't like waste lol

lalalalyra · 31/08/2017 11:03

I do all of my kids' parties in the village hall but I wouldn't do a bouncy castle for 27 3yos - there is bound to be tears when someone has to get off or wait a turn. I never do more than 2 groups of kids for a bouncy castle party - 1 group bouncing and 1 group doing other-fun-thing. More than two groups adds stress imo.

I always plate up food, it seems to get eaten better that way. Just clingfilm a plate and sort the plates into bags/boxes by sandwich filling. Kids love picking their plates.

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