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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To report my 'D'Sis for her online trolling?

58 replies

monkeysee100 · 30/08/2017 08:58

I got on well with my DSis despite her overblown sense of self and pathological lying mainly because I would catch her out and not fall for it. She's a lot younger than the rest of the siblings and has been totally over indulged and has a massive superiority complex, forever trying to 'make it' through hare brained reality tv schemes or get rich quick things when she and her 'D'P are funded mostly by his über wealthy parents. She has found a partner who is universally unliked but DPs again indulge this. Even when they turn up to stay for days, pretty much unannounced. For example, three days after we moved into new house and in the near future bringing his family too!!!

I'm getting miffed because she keep posting things on social media like she's so bloody perfect eg having a pop at people who like. drink when she has been banned for drink driving. Or her current one is to body shame others when she has very disordered eating in the vain hope of being a model. It makes me so bloody angry!

I can't confront her directly because it causes such tension with DPs. So have to content myself with reporting her bloody posts!!

OP posts:
statementOfInterest · 30/08/2017 09:00

YABU to simply not hide her posts and move on.

Are you 12?

Do FB even remove posts for hypocrisy?

AddToBasket · 30/08/2017 09:00

This is your problem not hers. You can only change you.

Block her posts. Do not listen to the crap, do not indulge the stays.

ZeroFuchsGiven · 30/08/2017 09:00

She sounds nasty but being nasty does not make her a troll.

gamerchick · 30/08/2017 09:01

Report her for what? And to whom?

Yeah she sounds like a cock but being a cock is not a crime.

SavoyCabbage · 30/08/2017 09:01

Is that trolling? It's just being a bit of a cow.

MarmaladeIsMyJam · 30/08/2017 09:02

Report her to who? Confused

ilovesooty · 30/08/2017 09:02

Just hide and block her. What do you gain from following or reading her posts?

SaucyJack · 30/08/2017 09:03

I think you need to remember that she is an adult, and she has the right to post whatever opinion she has- or whatever version of herself that she chooses to present to the world- on her own social media accounts. It's quite simply not your place to police her posts.

Step back :-)

AnneGrommit · 30/08/2017 09:04

God?

Ohyesiam · 30/08/2017 09:06

She has mental health problems. You sound way too invested. Step back, and keep repeating " not my circus, not my monkeys "

krustykittens · 30/08/2017 09:07

She's not trolling, you have nothing to report her for. No one puts their real lives, warts and all, on social media. You might think she is taking it too far but that's just your opinion. What you really seem to want is for everyone to agree with your opinion of her, you will drive yourself crazy doing that. Block her posts and ignore.

AfunaMbatata · 30/08/2017 09:09

That isn't trolling!Grin

QueenOfVipers · 30/08/2017 09:09

She's a dickhead, but last I checked being a dickhead doesn't violate facebooks terms of service.
precisely who are you going to report her to? Confused

Original poster
monkeysee100 · 30/08/2017 09:15

I should clarify. The posts are quite vicious and aimed at individuals

OP posts:
Copperbeech33 · 30/08/2017 09:17

what do you mean your parents indulge her for having a partner who is universally unliked?

what are they supposed to do? forbid it?

Anyway, he obviously ISN'T universally unliked, she likes him!

Original poster
monkeysee100 · 30/08/2017 09:18

She likes the idea of him. She's admitted that to me. He offers a way into a lifestyle that she wants.

OP posts:
CockacidalManiac · 30/08/2017 09:20

If the people are are unlawful and anonymous, then yes. Otherwise, just delete and block her.
You don't have to engage with her or see her posts.

SparklingBollox · 30/08/2017 09:20

I think you really need to step back. You don't like her, you don't need to like her, hide her posts and move on.

CockacidalManiac · 30/08/2017 09:21

*posts, not people.

brasty · 30/08/2017 09:22

Hypocrisy is hard to deal with. I have a relative who complains about benefit scroungers he knows, and is on benefits and refuses to work more hours because it is not worth his while. You couldn't make it up.
Personally if I was you, I would unfollow her facebook so I could not see her posts. Then you can't get wound up by them.

HeteronormativeHaybales · 30/08/2017 09:23

You sound resentful of her favoured and indulged status.

She's doing a good enough job of car-crashing her own life, if that's what gives you satisfaction. It would be better - not to mention more dignified - to simply avoid/ignore.

SparklingBollox · 30/08/2017 09:26

Sound like my inlaws bratsy.

They criticised me for not teaching my (baby) dc to like ice cream - it was too cold for them, they brought it up years after they were babies and made out that I had ruined their baby years and being lazy by not getting them used to it. In the next breath they criticised me for reading with them every night, apparently teaching them to read is not as important as the ice cream thing.
It's infuriating, but haters gonna hate, fuck all I can do about it.

ikeadyounot · 30/08/2017 09:26

You sound very jealous of your sister. I don't mean that in a way that is critical of you: I think jealousy can be a normal, natural and healthy reaction to real unfairness. It sounds as though the real situation here is with your DP, who seem to be treating your sister very differently to the other siblings - something that you resent.

In fact, it sounds a bit like a classic golden child/scapegoat setup, with your sister as the golden child who can do no wrong, and you as the scapegoat who is always blamed for pointing out the untruths and the unfairnesses. At some level, you realise that this is damaging for your sister as well as for you (you mention her lack of a connection to reality and hare-brained schemes) but because you're not seeing the dynamic clearly, you're putting this all on her when it is in fact an entire family setup that is at fault.

I think it's important to recognise what you can and can't change in a situation like this. You can emotionally distance yourself from the entire dynamic so that it no longer pains you to see the injustice (trust me, I have had to do this, counselling helps). You can choose to ignore and walk away from bad behaviour. You can't necessarily change either of those things, however: you can only control your own reactions to them.

Neutrogena · 30/08/2017 09:29

Please mind your buisness and grow up

SparklingBollox · 30/08/2017 09:29

Good post ikead (although it took me longer than it should have done to figure out your name)