Music All The Time

[DarthMaiden]

DH and I are happily married.

There is just one issue that grates me.

Everything has to be accompanied by music. Loading the dishwasher, ironing etc etc

He's got an extensive record collection (plus streamed music subs) and the whole house has been "Sonos'd" with a wireless music system.

I like music but to quote Depeche Mode I'd really like to "enjoy the silence".

In the car (with an upgraded stereo) and the house, there is never any quiet time. I retreat to the snug and I can still hear it. Music all the time in every room.

I do have the Sonos app on my phone/ipad to turn the volume down/switch off rooms but I just end up feeling hounded into other parts of the house.

The kids are fine with it - it's just me. I'm just a grumpy old fucker aren't I who wants to read in peace?

If you can't beat em join em springs to mind. ..

It's a bit much... My DH would sympathise - I have TalkRadio on practically all day too. The ads are super annoying and intrusive.

I tried that....

Thing is I actually want "quiet" not my music.

Do you have room for a She Shed or cave? This would drive me bonkers.

YANBU. DH turns the radio on in any room he goes into. It's noise pollution. It's also a well known form of torture.

Mine listens to pod casts. Endless podcasts of other people spouting crazy or pointless opinions. Spattered with bad language and weird Adverts and people laughing at their own jokes. Music would be blessed relief. I sometimes put white noise on to drown them out if I'm away from it but can still hear it in the background. It's not silence but it's also not distracting from reading.

I can relate, mine is the same. I like music but sometimes I just want quiet. It's so rare that it's special. But if I'm sat at home in silence he'll come in and immediately turn on the TV or music without even asking.

Noise canceling head phones?

(Or a fake power cut)

I can hide out in rooms without music but I feel like that's missing the point?

I'd actually just like to spend time eating dinner, reading the paper etc without a "soundtrack".

Thing is I love music but I hardly listen to it anymore by myself. It's like a respite!!

What would happen if you said right, tonight let's turn off all this noise. Just for once in a blue moon I would like to eat without music on somewhere in this house.

If he complains point out that you haven't had a music-free meal for xxx months, it has all been his choice and it's not a lot to expect to have one evening of your choice compared to all the evenings you have had of his choice!

YANBU. I have sound all day at work, I want silence (or even quiet) at home, not wall to wall fucking music.

I've tried that - but I'm a lone voice!

The kids like it. It's just me.

If I hear Cage the Elephant unpeeled album again I think I'm going to recreate the scene from Shaun of the Dead where records are used as projectile weapons!

I can't walk around all day with headphones on...I invested in some noise cancelling ones.

I'm just wondering if it's just me... both teen kids like it. I'm just uncool apparently

I love music, I even usually have the telly on in the background, but that would drive me to insanity I think. Need some silence in your life, depeche mode were right.

Radio4 for my DH. Any room he goes into, then he doesn't switch it off and I end up wondering what the noise is upstairs. Its just background noise, half the time he isn't really listening to it anyway. I love having the house to myself for a couple of hours with no music etc.

That would drive me crazy. There needs to be a balance. Why should he get constant music and you get no music free time?

Omg mine watches footy/listens to music in the kitchen. Then wanders off to do other jobs leaving the sounds on. It drives me fucking spare.

I suffer with misophonia and it hurts my head.

I will go in and mute tv/ radio then dh says I only went for a piss.

Silence is so precious

My ex did that, it drove me to distraction. I bought him various types of headphones, like a beany hat with built in head phones, cordless headphones etc, so he could wear headphones and I wouldn't hear his music. Didn't stop him turning something on in every room though.
And didn't stop the constant fecking HUMMING! After we split up I had to live with him for 8 months and I swear I nearly throttled him for that fecking humming all the time. And literally always the same song too!

Now I live on my own. It's quiet. It's great.

I hear you OP. DH likes the TV on in the background. I'd like some peace sometimes. I get up early to read and have a cup of tea, he realises and turns up- immediately switching on the TV.

It's your home too, fuck being out voted by children. Just tell him you would like some bloody quiet for once or that if he wants to listen to his music to sod off to another room instead of you having to.

My DP is like this, its either his choice of music, fucking football or his podcasts. If I complain, he says, put what you want on ..... I want silence.

The football is the worst. I'm thinking of saying we split the day, he choose his, then I'll have Jane Austen audio books the rest. That'll show him.

DH always listens to music really loudly in kitchen which hurts my head. I'm forever asking him to turn it down so I don't have to shout over it. He calls me Grandma. The worst is listening to Talk Sport radio it's my version of nails on blackboard.

I feel for you, OP. My h (who I'm in the process of splitting up with) not only plays his beloved classical music all the time, he also plays it very loudly. He has never once been considerate about whether I might find it too loud / annoying etc and even shouted at me once for turning the volume down. It has got to the stage where I just crave quietness. When he went away for a few days recently, the peace was bliss!

I listen to podcasts 24/7 because of anxiety (shuts up my inner voice) but I have like 5 different pairs of headphones for different occasions like sleeping, work, commute, cleaning, etc. I would be mortified to make everyone else listen to my coping mechanisms. Make him wear headphones, ditto with the kids. If they like listening to music they can still can. Just through headphones. If he doesn't think they sound good or are uncomfortable bullshit he can get a different pair, he had the money to install sonos, he has the money to get a good pair or 2 of headphones.

Hello darkness my old friend . I cannot stand others imposing their need for noise in my house, especially when they are not really listening to it. Bring back the record player! You have to make a decision, select a record and listen to it.

Loving the quotes

Indeed - "the sound of silence" would be welcome.

Glad to hear I'm not alone. I was at the point thinking it's just me...

The thing is he is lovely in every other way. It's just this constant desire for music bloody all the time in every place.

On holiday he took wireless speakers so no respite there!

I've spoken about it, but he really doesn't get it.its not like he's being mean - he (and the kids) just seem flabbergasted that it's an issue.

As time has gone on it gets worse and music has stopped being something I enjoy. :-(