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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Self catering isn't a holiday. It's the same rubbish in a different location.

574 replies

wintersdawn · 24/08/2017 19:40

We are currently 3 days into a 10 day self catering holiday and I'm sick of it already. My DH loves self catering holidays as they are a break from work and a different location and he can spend the whole time winding down from work and enjoying the break from the commuting routine.

But for me it's just the same shit in a different place, DD6 and DS4 still wake up early no matter how late we let them stay up. We either head off somewhere for the day which seems to always cost a fortune or involve lots of driving or stay in the house but without all their normal toys and entertainment options. We aren't near a beach this time which would normally give the children hours of entertainment, as we are staying in a relations house whilst they are away to save money. We don't have the budget to eat out each night and so the same cleaning, cooking, washing crap happens as it would at home.

I know we needed a cheap holiday this year as we've just had to replace the car and we did the kitchen at the start of the year but this is the 4th year in a row of self catering and I'm over them.

I can't be the only one who gets dragged down by self catering? Can I?

OP posts:

CadnoDrwg · 24/08/2017 20:48

I've got to be honest, we wouldn't holiday somewhere that didn't have self catering as an option.

Our eldest doesn't like food and my husband can't enjoy his food if he can't see the prep/chef. Self catering means we get to holiday and not have food be a stressful issue for half the family.

I suppose it helps that DH and I share all cooking/cleaning so there's no domestic pressure on just one person.

I'm perfectly happy that others don't like it though, balance is perfect so there's space for all inclusive and self catering type folk

sunglassally · 24/08/2017 20:48

Self catering is a feminist issue.

PolarBearGoingSomewhere · 24/08/2017 20:49

Lweji an actual pan of chocolate... now that would be the perfect holiday breakfast

Glad we're not the only ones who have a 90% beige menu for holidays.

Your husband needs to pull his weight btw. Can't cook? He can collect a takeaway or make up he day's picnic, then.

BlackeyedSusan · 24/08/2017 20:50

yep, same shit, different location, different supermarket and an overexcited autistic boy who goes bonkers on holiday. (oh and a probably autistc girl who gets really anxious and you have to talk to like you are programming a computer as she is very literal and has just been discovered to have nut allergies. )

that and having ex as well as he comes to have a holiday with the children.

it is better than taking an autistic boy to a hotel though. oh yes.

BlackeyedSusan · 24/08/2017 20:52

or for that matter an allergic girl with other dietry requirements as well.

VanellopeVonSchweetz99 · 24/08/2017 20:52

I hear you OP. Total false economy.

Tomorrowillbeachicken · 24/08/2017 20:55

Your DH is a lazy git

PurpleMinionMummy · 24/08/2017 20:58

We go sc. We also eat out/get takeaway every night.

minoandolphin · 24/08/2017 20:59

My holidays as a child were like this. Due to having a "D"F who thought my DM should wait on him hand and foot as he expected at home too, and was too tight to pay for any meals out. (Or any activities). Holidays were shit; I was bored, mum was stressed.

Just went on a self-catering holiday with DH and our DD. It was a revelation. We shared all cooking and cleaning, we brought spending money to have a couple of meals out and a takeaway, more to do fun things with DD. As people have said, this isn't a self-catering problem. It's all about the person you go with. I suggest you go on strike. It's your holiday too.

Zaphodsotherhead · 24/08/2017 20:59

My XH always insisted on self catering too. He was a mean bastard.

It's just washing up in a different sink.

bouncydog · 24/08/2017 21:00

We've nearly always gone sc because of the flexibility BUT we've always eaten out or got takeaways. We love the extra space, staying in bed late (no housekeeping waiting to get in the room at ridiculous o'clock) etc. You need to make your OH share the chores though - mine has always done his share and more otherwise I would have insisted on hotels,

BenLui · 24/08/2017 21:01

Sorry Lweji it's been a long day. .

Ceto · 24/08/2017 21:04

I really like self catering, because it means we aren't tied to hotel mealtimes and aren't confined to our bedrooms in the evening. But we do it strictly on the basis that we're going to do absolutely minimal cooking, if any, so we tend to have takeaways or, at worst, things like shop-bought pizzas. And we wait till the end of the holiday to do anything much by way of cleaning.

Viviennemary · 24/08/2017 21:04

I absolutely agree. I totally refused to go self catering when DCs were little. Same old but in a different location. I don't care if DH does half I don't want to do any at all. But with older children it's quite good if you can afford to eat out most meals.

PugOnToast · 24/08/2017 21:04

That is why I refuse. We have been on one holiday. It was all inclusive. It was amazing.

BenLui · 24/08/2017 21:05

I'd missed the fact the OO said that her DH can't cook.

Hmmm. Can't boil water for pasta? Can't stick in a pizza? Do a atirfry?

Seriously? Because that's just a little bit... unattractive.

You have the perfect opportunity though OP. Just call out instructions from the sofa. It's personal development for him.

What on earth happens if you are ill or away? Does he call in his mother? Also unattractive

5rivers7hills · 24/08/2017 21:06

Well SC isn't as easy as a hotel in some ways, but in other ways it is easier re more space, more room to chill after the children are in bed.

If you are an equal partnership 50/50 house and children I think you wouldn't feel so bad.

Also I'd just do it a lot easier.

Breakfast - Pain au choc and bananas and yog.

Lunch - sandwiches made at lunch time.

Dinner - eat out 50% of the time, easy meals and ready meals the rest of the time - Filled pasta, garlic bread and bag salad. Bag stir fry. Steak and oven chips and roasted baby toms. Keep it simple.

Hulder · 24/08/2017 21:07

As a child we went from Butlins to Youth Hostels in order to have a cheap holiday without camping or self-catering.

My DM would fully agree it is same shit, different place. She would rather have had no holiday than do either.

gingercat02 · 24/08/2017 21:07

It's not usually my idea of a holiday either but for various reasons we are currently on a s/c break in the UK. We haven't "cooked" eaten out at least once daily. Doesn't have to be expensive I've used Clubcard and Nectar vouchers for 3 meals. Usedo supermarket ready meal type stuff, pizza and fajitas for the others. Always a dishwasher! Kids get up early wherever you are sadly

Lillycat100 · 24/08/2017 21:11

Hate self catering too, I remember washing up a ton of dishes with tears flooding down my face ! I hate washing up and in that crappy caravan we stayed in, it had no dishwasher like at my house so I felt I was worse off then at home . Not my idea of a holiday. I told my other half if we was to do self catering again it be very easy breakfast meals with disposable dining wear and we will be eating out for our other meals.

user1468353179 · 24/08/2017 21:11

We used to have a caravan and it was bloody hard work all the way in really limited conditions. I was like a slave, always doing all the cooking and sorting out the kids while my H thought it was wonderful, so relaxing.

LizB62A · 24/08/2017 21:13

For me, a holiday isn't a holiday if it's self catering
YADNBU

Summerswallow · 24/08/2017 21:13

The OP also says they aren't near a beach and are just in a relative's house. I had a holiday like this once and went into a depression. I just wished I was in my own house the whole time which was better for the children and in a nicer area! And had a dishwasher.

If you are living in someone else's house in the UK, unless it's in an amazing spot, then the weather/general drudgery is going to put a damper on this, sorry OP. Even abroad, I prefer being near a beach as it saves thinking of things to do and you can swim in the evenings if you don't fancy a day on the beach in the sun.

BewareOfDragons · 24/08/2017 21:14

You have a DH problem from the sounds of it. You should both be cooking, cleaning and shopping...

We're currently on a SC holiday; only way we can afford a long 2 week holiday away. We eat most meals at home, a couple of meals out/take aways, but mostly at home. And we make fresh sandwiches every day for lunch and bring snacks. Works fine since we both prepare food/clean up and have the children help now that they're old enough.

lljkk · 24/08/2017 21:15

"Self catering is a feminist issue."

Not sure how that works in my household given DH cooks all the evening meals. Maybe I'm a failed feminist for letting him do that?

We are fairly fussy about what we eat, and what DC eat. I'm not sure I could get what food we wanted in restaurants -- can't stomach the price, either.

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