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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

That boomers should should avoid criticising younger people when..

270 replies

TeaCake5 · 23/08/2017 08:37

They are the "the worst users of drink and drugs"

www.theguardian.com/world/2017/aug/23/wednesday-briefing-baby-boomers-worst-drinkers-and-drug-users

I guess they can afford to with housing not being a problem for them - people in their 20s and 30s have no spare money for drink and drugs!

OP posts:
DressedCrab · 23/08/2017 09:16

YABU. Ageist shite.

TheEmojiFormerlyKnownAsPrince · 23/08/2017 09:18

I know it's supporting the generation above. But it always has done, and you are still paying for your pension, whether it's supporting the people above or not.

highinthesky · 23/08/2017 09:20

I'm sick of the bloody whinging about Boomers. You have no idea of the hardships endured and still ongoing.

This. My parents are boomers and my memories of growing up in the 70s and 80s are that cash was very tight indeed. Much of their income after tax went on the mortgage and feeding their family. There was very little left after that.

GetOutOfMYGarden · 23/08/2017 09:24

But it always has done, and you are still paying for your pension, whether it's supporting the people above or not.

My private pension certainly does. My NI doesn't though, because nobody can guarantee that there will be a state pension when I reach pensionable age. State pension may not be able to be funded from the public purse at that time, my NI then may be going to something more important. It's a gamble that we're all forced by law to take.

Why do you think the workplace pension is law now? It's because the government needs people to have a safety net for if a future government takes state pension away.

Androidsdreamofelectricsheep · 23/08/2017 09:24

I am almost T total (2 glasses a year, probably) never tried drugs even in my youth, help out with grandchildren and foster grandchildren, can't afford a holiday this year, sold my car last year to buy a stairlift for disabled relative who moved in with us (DH still has a car). Do I fit the stereotype?

Tomorrowisanewday · 23/08/2017 09:24

What high said.

I was born late 60s, and my parents lived pay packet to pay packet (although we were never aware of that). It wasn't until my younger sister and I left home that they had money spare.

MissMoneyPlant · 23/08/2017 09:25

Bella They are no doubt being driven to the edge by certain millennials constantly borrowing money, asking for lifts, being unpaid childminders, suffering elder abuse and being asked constantly as to whom is getting what in the will.

I realise you are not personally promoting this attitude, but these sorts of comments from older generations really annoy me. They always seem to be talking about their own children and I just think - well you brought them up to be like that! I'm a millennial and I was taught to be sensible with money, usually expected to make my own way to places (so any lifts gratefully received), and generally expected to crack on with housework and stuff as a teen.

Gromance02 · 23/08/2017 09:29

The biggest thing that annoys me is when boomers seem to think that the younger generation could afford a home if only they put their minds to it. Average salary around where I live is £25k, average property is £250,000. So no amount of saving is going to get you anywhere near buying your own home.

Puggsville · 23/08/2017 09:31

DFil is enjoying his well-deserved retirement after working from the age of 15, living frugally and saving. I'm just glad he's able to enjoy these years, my parents died youngish.

So stop angsting about retirement age and whether there will be a state pension in 30+ years time, knuckle down, work hard and enjoy your life and ....

Become ACTIVE in protesting the lack of affordable housing and fair rental agreements. Try to effect change to make life better for yourselves and your families

Knope2020 · 23/08/2017 09:32

It's a tricky one...

When you try and point out to boomers that they have lived in a time of unprecedented economic growth they get very cross and seem to think you are implying they didn't work hard
Of course they did!
But no harder than me, or my dh or anyone else
They have benifitted from HUGE house price growth and lowest ever IR
Final salary pension schemes
Add to that most of them grew up when the nhs was new and shiny and they got great care
Also free university!

But...yeah...us whinging millenialls!!

fluffiphlox · 23/08/2017 09:33

I'm a boomer I suppose and really don't understand how we've allowed the current housing situation to develop. The salary:mortgage ratio just doesn't seem to add up. On the other hand, we paid up to 15% interest on our mortgage when we first had it.

Knope2020 · 23/08/2017 09:33

Oh god Yes!
Stop buying coffee and you can get a deposit!

TheEmojiFormerlyKnownAsPrince · 23/08/2017 09:34

But the NI contributions are in effect a 'contract' and we're always assumed to be so. It will take a very brave government to take th contract away after people have been paying for years. I'm not saying they won't, but it would cause a massive outcry. I paid for the generation above me all my working life.

Although l fail to see why this is relevant to the Boomers the majority of whom have retired. Unlike myself who will be working to 67.

Livingdiisgracefully · 23/08/2017 09:34

I'm a boomer and I have some sympathy with the OP's perspective. I would say though that you can't lump everyone into the same category. Having said that there are a particular type of boomer that has benefited from plentiful jobs, rising prices, a good safety net of benefits, pensions and health services, who voted for less taxes under Thatcher and yet expect all the care and benefits now, without having to dip into their own substantial savings or not leave everything to their children. All the while complaining about the feckless youth that just don't try hard enough.

These people aren't just an invention. I know some of them.

Obviously not all boomers are like this. But it is irritating to hear some of the things they spout, and I do challenge it!

So many things are better. The 70s were pretty drab and cold. And I benefitted from Thatchers boom and bust so struggled to get work.
But I wouldn't want to try and save for a property now as a young person.

Foxyloxy1plus1 · 23/08/2017 09:34

As a baby boomer I worked two jobs when in my 20s to be able to pay the mortgage.
There was no (affordable) childcare, so when the children were little I did tutoring in the evening.
I worked full time when they went to school, with a self employed husband who worked six days a week and a mother who lived with us for many years.
I have an occupational pension. It is not keeping pace with price rises and we are cutting down more and more.
I don't smoke or take drugs and probably have a glass of wine about once a month.
We have no second home
We last had a foreign holiday in 2007.
I've been an unpaid babysitter, looking after grandchildren, collecting from school, having them to stay, doing the things that many grandparents do.
I've helped out with wedding costs, home improvements and help to get on the housing ladder. The last time I mentioned that, I was told to stop moaning because it was my choice. Indeed it was, but I had expected it to be paid back, which it won't be and now means that we must be very careful with our finances.

We bought our first house when interest rates were 15%. I grew up in a house with no central heating, frost inside the windows in winter. We used public transport, never had a car when I lived at home, all the things that people these days regard as necessities.

So yes, you are unreasonable. I don't criticise the decisions that younger people make, so you shouldn't criticise those that older ones do.

Knope2020 · 23/08/2017 09:36

Real wage growth has plummeted in the UK compared to other countries...saw a graph on Twitter the other day
Sobering reading
Gone are days of being able to buy a house on one (average) salary!

scaryteacher · 23/08/2017 09:36

We are two Gen Xers with a millenial ds. I think each generation criticises the other both up and down the scale. My Mum criticises us, we criticise ds, who criticises us. Isn't it fun?

Each generation has different hardships to contend with. For my Mum, a war baby, it was real austerity and rationing. For us, it was high interest rates, high unemployment at times, growing up in the 70s, no central heating, black and white TV (not a hardship per se), and having a phone in the house was unusual for some people. I remember the central heating being installed in my parents house - my Mum no longer had to clear the fire out every day,

My grandparents had an outside loo, and there was no bathroom, you washed at the kitchen sink. They died in the late 70s. We are in the process of moving rentals as the landlord wants the house back, so we are going from very modern bathrooms with shower cubicles to a 1750 house that has three bathrooms, but showers over the baths. Ds is turning up his nose at this. I did have the satisfaction of telling him to check his privilege on that one!

OwlinaTree · 23/08/2017 09:36

I think it's easy to see the 60/70 somethings in their big empty nests and judge when you are raising a family in a house half the size.

Thing is, my children's lifestyle are so different to my own. They go abroad for holidays, they eat out loads, they go on day trips all the time. They have brand new clothes. Presumably my parents couldn't afford those things.

So I think expectations are different now. We sometimes compare the end of their economic situation with the middle of our own, at a time when costs are high due to childcare etc.

Many of the empty nesters probably would sell, but need to sell for quite a bit to enable them to buy something smaller and suitable, and we all know how much hassle it is to move, plus expensive. Some people have a big house, but might not have much income etc etc.

5rivers7hills · 23/08/2017 09:36

I was born late 60s, and my parents lived pay packet to pay packet (although we were never aware of that). It wasn't until my younger sister and I left home that they had money spare

And you think people don't live pay packet to pay packet now? Get with the truth...

The current generation is the first one that is going to be worse off than the generation before. Fact. Not an annacdote about how someone's parents are beans on toast.

mogulfield · 23/08/2017 09:37

puggsville I do work very hard, I've been saving for my own pension since I was 22. I am taking steps, as I know there won't be a full salaried pension for me at 55 like there was for my Grandad in law.
No use getting to read retirement age and going 'oh bugger I've got no money, I thought the government would help me out like it did my grandparents'.
I won't be putting my head in the sand thank you.

HexagonsOptional · 23/08/2017 09:38

Millennials are simultaneously ruining the housing market by spending all their money on luxury avocado toast

Grin PMSL

I'm a millenial. I guess my mum is a baby boomer but she has a much harder life than I do!

Knope2020 · 23/08/2017 09:38

Foxy...are you saying you lent your dc money which they are now refusing to pay back????

We've never had any financial help
From either parents

Never expected it

GetOutOfMYGarden · 23/08/2017 09:38

But the NI contributions are in effect a 'contract' and we're always assumed to be so. It will take a very brave government to take th contract away after people have been paying for years. I'm not saying they won't, but it would cause a massive outcry. I paid for the generation above me all my working life.

The pension fund is projected to be unsustainable by 2038. At that point, it's not unreasonable to think that a government will say 'either we cut the state pension, or you don't get free healthcare. You've all had 20+ years of work pension being the law anyway, you knew it was coming'.

There is no contract in NI. I don't begrudge paying for the generations above me, but it's very eyeroll worthy when they insist I'll get the same as them. That's not how our population pyramid is structured.

Knope2020 · 23/08/2017 09:41

Sadly I think that's why we've see the upheavals globally that we have... brexit, trump...people are finally realising that for the first time in generations their kids will be worse off than them
Easier to blame immigrants than tackle the real socio economic issues I guess

Knope2020 · 23/08/2017 09:43

I'm not expecting a state pension
It's simply not sustainable
Since 1945 people are living much longer - I know people who have been claiming SP for 3 decades

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