To ask what's the worst wedding you've ever been to?

[WashingMatilda]

I've just come back from a really gorgeous wedding. It was one of those joyous, real life affirming ones IYKWIM.

However, during the speeches I randomly remembered a wedding I went to years and years ago where the grandmas wheelchair was left without its brakes on at the top of a big flight of steps outside the registry office. She rolled forward, all the way down, cracked her head open on the slabs, ambulance took her off on blue lights, and the bride spent the reception scrubbing blood out of her train poor bloody woman. It was horrific. (Nan fine in the end)

What's yours?

Extremely religious couple - the bride's father was heavily involved in the church. After a very long ceremony, we were treated to an hour long sermon which mainly focused on how the man was the head of the household and it was the woman's role to support him in his endeavours. A memorable segment included an exclamation that the bride had a degree and COULD DRIVE- but still had to be there for her husband. DH had to hold me in my seat...

Wedding itself was lovely and well organised, just peppered with embarrassments. An old friend (male) from my teenage years who I didn't see much of any more, so the invitation had been a bit of a surprise. Thought it would be good to see a few old faces again.

Dh and I attended the ceremony with 3 month old dd1, who was good as gold throughout but got the LOUDEST hiccups I've ever heard, just as the vows were being exchanged. At least it was a distraction from the realisation that the best man was a guy I had once been engaged to.

At the reception, the best man got so nervous when attempting to make his speech that he gave up, pretending unconvincingly to have been overcome with emotion instead. The bride's father began his speech by thanking everyone 'for coming to witness the marriage of my daughter to "Groom's Name". There were audible snorts from about half the guests at the mention of the groom's name. I never did find out what that was about.

Baby dd1 soon got very grizzly so, as planned, dh left me alone at the reception to take her back to our hotel. I got chatting to the older woman next to me, who turned out to be the bride's aunt, and either very drunk or very mad. Somehow she became fixated on the idea that I was the groom's ex-wife from his very short-lived previous marriage. I couldn't convince her otherwise, and she reeled round the reception for the rest of the night loudly pointing me out to everybody. After she'd gone off to do this I was left sitting like a lemon until I was gallantly 'rescued' - by the best man, my ex-fiance, accompanied by the groomsman. Both were drunk as skunks and sat there for over an hour, quoting dialogue at me from the then most recent Star Wars movie, with particular emphasis on Jar Jar Binks.

Best man then got a little handsy, so I excused myself and spent ages just wandering around by myself. Ended the evening in a taxi back to our hotel, giving relationship advice to the groomsman as he wept on my shoulder. I believe the girl in question finally relented and married him, so at least it has a happy ending. And the bride and groom are still together as well.

Not a crap wedding so to speak but a not so nice groom.

Invited to a night do, 2 weeks before my due date with my son. So was very pregnant. They had a buffet so I go up and get food, waddle back to my seat and the groom was sat in my seat, my bag and phone was next to his plate of food! Didn't even attempt to move for me to sit down, in the end my friend got up so I could sit down. Everyone knew I had bad hips with the pregnancy. I just thought he was really rude. Every time I see him now, I still feel the rage

Not so much the wedding but the party after was at a greasy spoon cafe in a well known sea side resort!

Attended an 11 am wedding at a church 3 hour drive away when I was 7-8 months pregnant with dc1, very rainy day all photos had to be taken inside church, drove short distance afterwards to reception to be told that reception didn't start till 4pm but we were welcome to wait in the bar until then (this was to all the guests inc b&g) nothing else to do but drink unless you were pregnant so I was bored rigid and spent most of day wandering around the hotel alone and popping back to our room to watch tv whilst dh was in the bar with mates inc groom. So 4pm arrives everyone is v drunk, speeches heavily reference 2 family members (1 brides side and 1 grooms) who tragically died few years prior which induces actual wailing from some family members. Anyway rest of evening is just everyone getting more and more paralytic, I retire to bed earlyish and dh joins me. I wake up to the sound of vomiting around 3am to find dh leaning out of the bed producing a lake of sick on the floor next to the bed, the smell was so bad I was gagging constantly. I refuse to stay in the room and can't do anything to clean it up so we pack up and leave the hotel and drive (the 3 hours) home at 3.30 am. I called the hotel as soon as it was a sensible hour and apologised and offered to pay for the room to be cleaned - I was mortified and still shudder at the memory of it all

@raisinbrain was it my wedding 😂

fc301
You're on the shortlist, but there are some pretty strong contenders here!
Just trying to manage your expectations.

I don't believe half of these stories.

The one in Belfast where half the guests were the very multicultural friends and family of the groom who was marrying into the bride's staunchly Presbyterian family.

The service included literally two hours of Ian Paisley style preaching from the reverend and was particularly vehement about catholics, muslims and other assorted heathens. My blood pressure steadily rose as our muslim friends next to us in the pew squirmed. Eventually one half of the couple left in tears and they never made it to the reception. Finally, my lapsed Irish catholic partner forgot he was lapsed and flamboyantly crossed himself as he left the church before slapping the reverend on the back and telling him it was "very nice, but no mass, I'm afraid". The man was visibly horrified.

None of the bride's family or friends would speak to the groom's side and although it wasn't a "dry" wedding they'd compromised by having no booze on the tables but a paying bar. We promptly bought a bunch of bottles of wine for our table and were shunned for the rest of the wedding.

And to top it off, Van morrison was also staying in the hotel the reception was in, and he was bloody rude too!

We've alas been to a free-P wedding like th poster above, but it was interesting rather than bad (and no-one minded when we ordered wine for the table..)

First bad wedding..great friend from primary School, we didn't really know any one else who was going, but I'm quite laid back (and can cast to most people) so bride sat us with the militant left wing nutters - forgetting that DH is a banker. We decide to leave and go for a a nap and then returned after the meal for a dance. Oh and the creme brulee was curdled.

Second one was a lovely wedding with just not enough food, ceremony was at 12noon and meal wasn't till 5pm and everyone was hungry and pissed. meal was literally finger food.

waiting okaaaaayyyy....

I've heard shit things about VanMorrison too, caoraich I'm sure it's him that my mum says 'There are two kinds of people - those that like Van Morrison and those that have met him'

jcsp . So? I'd have been quite blunt in telling them that I was getting a quick shop done for the reasons stated, and why the actual fuck are they following me?

Ooh, remembered another one - was an OK-ish wedding apart from the entertainer at the reception. The bride was from Eastern Europe and I think the entertainer was a mate of hers and English was not his first language - anyway, he sat down with his guitar and announced that he was happy to be here and this song was for the bride and groom...

Bad Moon Rising.

My friends sister did a speech, I thought that was nice until she listed every single one of my friends exes, saying what they were like and why friend had broken up with them.

"First she went out with Dave, they met at school, so they were too young to sleep together. His mum used to be a terrible cook. They broke up because she stated seeing Mark. He was her first... etc etc"

I'm not a jealous type but actually at the wedding it was a bit much, lol. I'd have rugby tackled her if I hadn't been 6m pregnant.

Went to the worst wedding of my life about 6 years ago!
Had to fork out loads for the dress and shoes ETC! Because the theme was "underwater" I didn't mind doing so too much, but everyone invited had to pay for their own dinner, their own drinks, their own accommodation and transportation. There was a wedding gift list, everything was priced over £100, the guests bought every piece of furniture they own!!
If it had been a close friend, I wouldn't have minded AS MUCH! But for an old work colleague?

Although the bride and groom were generous enough to offer us digital and printed copies of the photos for £40!

In the end, the stress of affording someone elses wedding left me in such a tizzy, the whole day was ruined!

I enjoy almost all weddings I go to... love how differently people take the same day and personalise them. Big weddings, small ones, generally I like them all. Only one wedding stands out for me as the wedding from hell.

The wedding was held in a church which was okay, but the toilets were really grim. Cue toddler needing the loo. Unfortunately, no one had thought to clean the loos, and it was disgusting! Took the toddler to the loo, it was covered in poo. Tried to hold her over it, didn't work, she ended up pissing all over my foot and getting shit (not hers) on her dress.

Then we were walked to a park to have photos taken. It was one of the hottest days of the year (think mini heatwave), we were stood outside for ages waiting for photos. It was boiling hot, and there was virtually no shade, so both children were getting hot and bothered. The park was near a big lake, so FIL decided to take my Toddler off to see the ducks. Didn't tell anyone, just disappeared with her. I was running round going mad trying to find her, and he eventually reappeared, being really grumpy that I was upset he had just gone off with her and hadn't told anyone. I was furious.

The reception was held in a village hall with no windows, so in the heatwave, it was stifling. My DH was sat on top table, and they put me, my baby and toddler right on the opposite side of the room. They invited loads of guests, so once seated it was difficult to get any where, there was no seat for the baby obviously, so I was squashed in with my baby in a pram next to me. I was stuck in my seat.

Then, despite it being bloody boiling - they didn't provide any drinks on the tables. Instead they provided everyone with one free drinks voucher that you could trade in for a drink. With DH stuck on the other side of the room, I was on a table with people I barely knew... given the heat, the queues to get drinks was long and constant, so I couldn't just abandon my children to get myself a drink, and had to endure the whole wedding breakfast with no drink whatsoever.

Food was a buffet. We were one of the last tables to get there. There wasn't really enough food to go around, so by the time we got there, there wasn't anything my toddler would eat. There was nothing child friendly (despite there being lots of children there). There was a massive fish, potato salad and lots of meats. My daughter and I (both veggie) had nothing to eat. Thankfully I had a packed shitload of snacks, so my daughter ate those instead. I largely went hungry. I was so close to buggering off to McDonald's.

Despite there being a good number of children there, the venue didn't really have much of an outside area, and it certainly wasn't child friendly. so it was boiling hot, no windows and nowhere to take the children. Another little boy had a complete meltdown, and threw a metal train, hitting my baby's head whilst I was breastfeeding.

Spent most of the night sat on the floor in a corridor, with my baby stripped to her nappy, trying to keep her cool and not scream the place down, counting down until it was a respectable time for us to leave.

Yep, I only have nightmares from that wedding!

Can anyone explain this bizarre business of inviting someone to the ceremony and the evening party but not the reception meal in between? I've seen posts about this a few times and it's absurd! I think it's usual to invite evening guests who haven't been to the ceremony or reception but the former situation is so bloody rude!

Mine was like a Fawlty Towers episode. Firstly, my bridesmaids and I all got food poisoning in the restaurant the night before the wedding. Then the next morning despite me specifically saying that the bridesmaid dress that I had asked to be ironed remained on the premises, they had sent it in to town to be dry-cleaned. Of course it went missing. It rained and we kept calling to see if the limos had turned up. They couldn't see them through the giant glass windows and they had been waiting for 40mins. When the concierge turned up with some umbrellas and asked if there was anything else we would like, I sarcastically mentioned the missing bridesmaid dress. He said that he had put it in another room early that morning. He got it and my lovely maid had her dress. The celebrant (who had seemed normal before the wedding) spoke like she was talking to dim preschoolers and paused and winked on every... second... word. Very strange. THEN when my husband and I went to our room, we discovered that they had booked the honeymoon suite for us AND the three bridesmaids. Not MY fantasy. We ended up leaving that for the girls and we had a shitty room. When we finally got into our room after our reception, they had checked my husband's bags into the room of another honeymooning couple. We had a plane to catch 1.5hrs from the hotel early the following morning, and they didn't want to disturb the other couple to get it. They offered us a free breakfast in the hotel, but as a towel wasn't going to meet their standards, we had to decline. It was only when I threatened to go shopping at a designer boutique at their expense so we could catch our flight that they finally found our bag. Our honeymoon was very relaxing. It's been 15 years.

At 18 a then good friend had an affair with an older, married man with DC, who left his wife. She didn't take up her university place and moved in with and later had a baby with him. When she was 20 they decided to get married, small wedding in registry office and pub function room afterwards. On the day she was visibly 5 months pregnant with DC2, in her white dress, and hadn't told her family.

Didn't see her much afterwards. They're still married 20 years on.

It's not happened yet but I'm dreading my sisters wedding next year

She's really talking it up but so far of the 3 bridesmaids she's wanting, only one is left...which is me and I'm thinking of backing out with what she's just done to me.

My mum wore a navy blue so dark it was almost black at my wedding because she hates my dh...she adores my brother in law so I've got to watch her fawn over him.

Plus everyone will be drinking so there will probably be some form of argument

Hmmmm possibly the one where the bride smacked her SIL and bitched at the bridesmaids if they dared sit down for a second 'as it was their duty to dance and look like they were having fun to encourage everyone else to do the same'

Aaarrggh - the Fail has picked up this....

Oh for fucks sake!!

happy I've got one of these on Saturday, I'm just going to go to the ceremony. Feels a bit shit tbh.