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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think he might think I'm a bunny boiler?

41 replies

liveandbehappy432 · 20/08/2017 18:31

So last week I bump into my ex for the first time.
I'm casually having a couple of drinks with my current BF and spot two of his friends looking at me grinning.
My heart starts racing because I know he will be here somewhere.
Then I spot him.
Then obviously I couldn't help myself slyly looking over ..every time I look he is looking so catches me looking.
I walk to the toilets and as I walk back one of his friends grabs my waist smiling and says "stay" I just say hello and head back to my BF.
My ex then walks right in front of our table and starts talking on the phone but catches me looking at him again.
Will I have looked like a crazy ex by keep looking?

OP posts:
Petitefleurblanche · 20/08/2017 18:34

Are you both 12?

Mysteriouscurle · 20/08/2017 18:35

I think your ex comes across as not over you tbh. If every time you looked he was looking, then he was obviously watching you a lot. And the walking right in front of your table in his phone kindof screams desperation to me.

His mates should not be grabbing you like that.

Why are you concerned with what he thinks of you. Sounds like youve moved on and met someone else. Might be good to avoid him altogether

Original poster
liveandbehappy432 · 20/08/2017 18:35

According to my birth certificate no...
He has always had a weird affect on me.

OP posts:
KatsutheClockworkOctopus · 20/08/2017 18:37

What did your current boyfriend think of all the looking and grabbing? Shouldn't that be more of a worry than what your ex makes of it?

RebornSlippy · 20/08/2017 18:38

Well, he wouldn't have known you were looking if he hadn't been looking. So, it's ok, OP. You are as weird as eachother.

Just wondering if your new boyfriend noticed the effect he had on you?

Original poster
liveandbehappy432 · 20/08/2017 18:39

He is only a new BF..1 month or so.
He didn't see the looking as I was facing my ex but he had his back to him.
He did see his friend grab my waist and suggested getting a seat at this point

OP posts:
SheSaidHeSaid · 20/08/2017 18:39

Was your bf not annoyed that you kept looking over?

Whataboutmeee · 20/08/2017 18:39

How could you be a bunny boiler if you just glanced at him in a bar?

SheSaidHeSaid · 20/08/2017 18:39

Cross posted

Gorgosparta · 20/08/2017 18:40

Maybe concentrate on your actual boyfriend, when out with him.

I can not see how your ex would think you are a bunny boiler. Not even close.

I think you are enjoying the drama slightly.

user1457213512 · 20/08/2017 18:40

Confused Sounds like you're making a bit of a mountain out of a molehill to be honest, but then again we weren't there, so...

Maybe you should just forget about it? It doesn't really sound like it's anything worth thinking about further or losing sleep over.

Original poster
liveandbehappy432 · 20/08/2017 18:40

I think he had.
We were having a conversation but I couldn't really concentrate.
I started talking gibberish.

OP posts:
user1457213512 · 20/08/2017 18:40

And yes, it certainly doesn't sound as though you're a bunny boiler. Dramatic maybe, but not a bunny boiler.

ChickenBhuna · 20/08/2017 18:40

Why do you care what he thinks?

Gorgosparta · 20/08/2017 18:41

Sorry but most people can spot when someone they are with are preoccupied.

I doubt youe bf was oblivious.

Original poster
liveandbehappy432 · 20/08/2017 18:41

He just asked what was I looking at ..I said trying to find a seat.
I was just worried he might think I wasn't over him when I wanted to look like I had moved on with someone knew and Was happy.

OP posts:
OuchLegoHurts · 20/08/2017 18:41

I think you sound either very young or else liked the drama

x2boys · 20/08/2017 18:42

How long ago did you split sounds as if neither of you is over the split tbh.

Original poster
liveandbehappy432 · 20/08/2017 18:42

I do still have feelings for him.
It's been a year and still makes me crazy.
After we left the pub I spent the whole night thinking about him..I need to stop.

OP posts:
Original poster
liveandbehappy432 · 20/08/2017 18:43

I'm not young I'm 27
It was a year ago now.

OP posts:
MadamePomfrey · 20/08/2017 18:43

I think the fact you more bothered over what you ex thinks than what your current bf thinks say a lot I'd have a serious thing about if you are really over your ex and ready for a new relationship!

ChickenBhuna · 20/08/2017 18:44

Right. So you care because you're not over him.

Not really fair on the guy you're dating is it?

x2boys · 20/08/2017 18:45

It doesn't seem as if your ready to be with the new boyfriend how long were you with the ex for?

BoredOnMatLeave · 20/08/2017 18:46

Not sure about bunny boiler but sounds a bit disrespectful to your new bf. If I was him I would bin you off to be honest, clearly not over your ex if you can't concentrate if he is in the same room Confused

Original poster
liveandbehappy432 · 20/08/2017 18:48

I'm not over him no but I'm trying to be..dating others etc.
Me and my ex had been friends for years but he was in the navy so hardly home.
He was the guy who I had feelings from since first day I met him all them years ago

OP posts: