About people just going into monologues

[qutternutbosh]

"Our Carl was off to the airport last night, so we went to pub for our tea, we had scampi and fries, our Molly had a lemonade and some roast beef, I said to her, Molly, that's too much, she said mum, I'm hungry, I said OK then and she ate it so she must have been hungry. And then our Carl went off, I said, Carl, have you got enough time, he said he had, we went back and the traffic was just chocka as the motorways were closed so we sat there and the radio was on, that new song was on, you know, that Spanish one, I like that, so we got in and I was going to clear up but our Molly said Mum, just sit down and watch Emmerdale so I did ..."

Sigh.

Just endless pointless monologues that go nowhere and just describe the ins and outs of everyday life. It's a colleague by the way. How can you STOP people like this??

My fil does this, I don't mind the abridged version of 'on Thursday we went to xx and had lunch' oh no, I get the full version of

'on Thursday or was it Wednesday no it was Thursday x and I went to xx we decided to go along the Axxx to get there but the traffic was bad so turned off along the Bxxx instead when we got to the pub I ordered this meal for x amount of money but she ordered xx meal for xx amount of money then we waited for a while then the food came out then we ate it....' lack of punctuation is deliberate because he doesn't pause for breath

Even worse my husband starts to do it when there and it seeps into our home. After long pointless stories I'll precis it for dh to how it should've gone, and said if I wanted to know the more minute detail I'd ask and that is what makes a conversation!
Phew, rant over!

Oh I know a few people like this....

The worst one goes into minute detail of everyday boring events. Something which should take two sentences, ends up being a 10 minute monologue.

I NOT FUCKING INTERESTED!

Oh yes ZigZag the insistesnce in getting every detail right.

Instead of "we went for a lovely meal last week" it's a five minute debate about exactly which day and what time they set off to get there, because of the temporary traffic lights, as they are repairing the kerb. Then exactly where everyone sat at the table followed by a detailed description of what everyone ordered.

I DONT FUCKING CARE!

I have a colleague at work like this.

He is so lovely that I could never say anything but he just goes on and on and on......and on!

Honestly, you ask him how his weekend was and he's still at your desk 45 minutes later and talking about something completely unrelated!

He is a well liked guy and married with kids so it's not an attention thing, he's just a massive chatterbox.

I have a friend who manages to laugh and say "is this story going anywhere?", which interrupts the stream of consciousness and makes the speaker wrap up the story quickly. I learn from her.

She does it with a smile and in a really nice way, as if she is a bit confused by it all and wants to help the talker.

A lot of people can't edit themselves at all. Maybe they were never taught how to summarise at school.
I otoh can never recount a good story because I self-edit too much, and it becomes "oh yesterday there were penguins in the kitchen" instead of an exiting story!

"I got up this morning and I rang my friend and I said: "eh, I know, lets go to the cafe for our breakfast."
And she said "okay then," so I said: "great."
And then we went off and we caught the number 17 and I was just getting off near that corner shop, the one that sells the cheap tomatoes, and I saw X.
And I said to my friend: "eh, that's X."
And she said: "You what?"
And I said: "over there, it's X."
So we got a bit closer and I said "look, I'm right."
And we had a lovely chat and a catch up.
And just as I was going, I said "see you later then."
And she turned round and said:"did you hear about xx?"
And I said: "you what?"
So she says: "ooh you'll never guess."
And I said: "tell me then."
And she says: "she's expecting."

^ this is my Mum.

I would say, "I bumped into so and so earlier and she's expecting."

I worked for very busy bosses for a long time so succinct was the order of the day. I listen to my Mum and think, "Get to the bloody point!!!" Mind you, she's always had the benefit of lots of time working part-time in a non stressful job.

This is my MIL. I think it's because she hasn't worked for 35-odd years and so has forgotten how to interact normally with other people - and has also forgotten that other people have limited time.

I asked her whether she enjoyed her salad at a recent visit to a restaurant. 'Well, yes, um um um, the salad said it came with pomegranate, almonds, and spinach... no, actually um um... pomegranate seeds, almonds, BABY spinach and um um, you know, BASIL leaves... but I expected it to come with some bread as well, you know, now I love pomegranate, I could eat a whole pomegranate at a sitting, you know, but when it arrived it was so small, and you know me, I'm not a big eater, but there were perhaps 5 pomegranate seeds, and I would have expected to see the almonds, but there were just a few flaked almonds, you could hardly see them, and the leaves, well um um, you know they were a bit WILTED, and the basil, well it provided somebody flavour, but it was still um um, all a bit plain, now you know me, I'm not a big eater [she's very proud of this fact!] but it just wasn't enough for anyone, I had to beg a piece of bread from Andrew [FIL] so that I didn't PASS OUT, um um anyway, to cut a long story short [you what love??]...'

I actually find it really mentally draining to deal with - I'm always totally shattered when she leaves!!

I find it mind numbing listening to what people have had for breakfast and every little boring detail from their lives I've distanced myself from friends who are like this.

It's rude to cut someone off but it's also rude to go on and on taking up loads of someone's time for no reason.

I had a friend who asked me if I had a nice holiday, I replied with yes thank you it was great. After that she showed no interest and went into excruciating detail about her day. I often find people who talk in a monologue to be self centered and uninterested.

Whenever I'm listening to a monnologuer, I have Simon Pegg (when he was in Spaced) in my head, saying "Skip to the end"!

My ex used to do this. Usually about something that happened to him at school or a woman he slept with, once

He probably does it about me, now.

It's incredibly rude to talk at someone about nothing endlessly instead of engaging them in actual conversation, so rudeness back is warranted I think. Frankly, most of the time nothing else will get through.

Anyway the easiest way to get rid of these people is to do it back to them. As soon as they get started, jump in and take over with your own never ending, exceptionally dull story, and don't let them interrupt. They don't want to hear about you, they don't care, they only want to talk about themselves. If they can't do that with you they'll avoid you.

My son's childminder does this. I am usually the first to arrive at pickup and then the other parents come and go while I am still patiently listening.

I do love her though, so I don't mind too much, just sometimes feel like I need to get the knack of cutting her off without being rude!

People are tuning around everywhere..its a wonder we're not all bumping into each other.
My sil will tell you a story , starts off sometime last week , moves on to the weekend and by the time shes got to the end ive Lost the plot. Some people cant get to the point. Long story short is the best way.

People who do this bore me. YANBU

PuppyMonkey Just Lol. So funny.