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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think that by financing our teenagers lifestyles we are creating a generation of people that don't know how to work.

175 replies

Sunshinegirls · 16/08/2017 16:18

We own a business and when we employ a young person (18/24) we struggle with them. They have no idea how to work, they are lazy, they are entitled.
Reading another thread just now it has occurred to me that it is the fault of today's parents.
When I was a teenager, I had summer and weekend jobs to pay for anything I wanted. My parents still fed and clothed me for school, but fashion items, possessions and leisure activities were financed by myself. It seems these days that (some) teenagers get everything bought for them and as such are growing up to be entitled and work shy.
Surely if a teen wants a gadget, they have to get a job to pay for the gadget?

OP posts:
Aunti · 16/08/2017 18:35

YANBU

DD nearly 10 has already earned her own money via a family business and has all her bday and Christmas monies in the bank.

She's actually richer than I am Wink

GlitterGlue · 16/08/2017 18:36

I was just talking to my hairdresser about this the other say. Recently she's really struggled to get both Saturday staff and a trainee. She's been through a few who've been awful - lazy, don't turn up etc. And the quality of candidates is pretty low as many parents don't want their kids to work. It's not just her either, in case anyone thinks she must be a terrible boss.

I do believe that work experience (paid or unpaid) is invaluable. You can definitely tell the candidates who've never worked before - they're (often) the 22 year old who is affronted at having to do a tea round or their own photocopying. Obviously they should have a corner office and their own PA, they've got a degree!

Sparklingbrook · 16/08/2017 18:36

Is it a chimney sweeping business Aunti?

Nomoreboomandbust · 16/08/2017 18:39

Na all pubs take on kitchen porters from 16 but it's a bloody long hard job. 2 of my lads did it for years through uni holidays etc but it's 9am to 11pm so not for the feint hearted.

My dds wouldn't have stuck it to be honest

Nomoreboomandbust · 16/08/2017 18:40

sparkling Grin

corythatwas · 16/08/2017 18:40

Not my experience. All dd's friends have had weekend jobs: the only reason she didn't was because she was too ill to even attend school during most of the relevant years. There is a lot of competition for work though (university town) so they often have to try quite hard to find a job, as employers prefer university students. But that is not the same thing as being spoilt by their parents.

Dd, who has been working for 2 years, has had a similar experience to Boulshired though: employers do not take on enough staff to cover emergencies, so there is a lot of pressure on young workers to take on extra hours even beyond legal limits.

Dd was sent home after vomiting once (in a catering job!); she hadn't got through the door before the first text arrived asking her to come in to cover for a sick colleague (!!!); even after reminded of the situation (I am the sick colleage), they kept pestering her every few hours.

ssd · 16/08/2017 18:44

young people get it hard enough these days without threads like this

sure there are bloody lazy and entitled teens, as there are people like that in all walks of life

my teens are hard workers and study too..ds2 is 16 and hasn't a hope in hell of getting a job here at that age, but I want him to concentrate on school this year, not on earning money, he has his whole life to do that.

Increasinglymiddleaged · 16/08/2017 18:46

They always were for parents that could afford it, and they aren't now for parents that can't.

A weird MN idea is that if you can afford to give DC everything they want then it should be given on a silver plate. It wasn't my experience of growing up in a relatively well off family. It was always the less well off who had designer clobber/ expensive hairdos etc....!

ssd · 16/08/2017 18:46

aunti, your DD wouldn't be so well off if she didn't have mummys family sorting out work for her

GetAHaircutCarl · 16/08/2017 18:47

Rubbish OP.

I was the teen who had to pay for everything myself and study around work ( no ones fault my parents were skint). It was not pleasant or life enhancing in any way.

I'm now well off and can pay for a lovely life for my teens. Why would I keep them short to prove a point?

They are both hugely hard working. Both volunteer. Neither waste money.

ssd · 16/08/2017 18:48

so increasingly, have you had no financial benefits from growing up in a relatively well off family, no inheritance, no hand outs, no flat deposits, nothing?

ChickenBhuna · 16/08/2017 18:48

I find teenagers very apathetic also OP. I worked from age 16 and paid for my own wants such as phone top ups , expensive trainers etc. I wanted to pay my own way.

My ds is a teenager and seemed to have an expectation of adults around him propping him up financially until he was 18. He thought this even though I'd mentioned since he hit 13/14 that once his NI number was through and his gcses had finished he would be expected to cover his own wants by getting , at the very least , a part time job. I even had to warn my dm that he was looking for money outside of his lunch money , as I knew he would go to her!

It's only after a year of me putting my foot down (restricting WiFi to keep his sleep schedule from becoming nocturnal , giving minimal lunch money) that he's realised there's no benefit to his poor attitude and has found a job.

I genuinely have no clue where this sense of entitlement stems from as the adults around him have always worked and made clear that a person must pay their own way.

GetAHaircutCarl · 16/08/2017 18:49

Also, most of their mates are really advantaged and they are all pretty measured when it comes to spending and all worked their socks off for their recent A levels.

PortiaCastis · 16/08/2017 18:50

When a teen has been abandoned by their Father, has to watch their dm suffer dv and still manage to take A levels and get a summer job I'm damn proud and will not let her be unfairly stereotyped by folk that haven't met her

Nomoreboomandbust · 16/08/2017 18:51

Get that's spot on.

Ours didn't need to work and to be honest it was a fucking pain getting up at the weekend to drive the 17year old to 5am shift start at the coffee shop but hey it's good parenting I think Grin

Aunti · 16/08/2017 18:52

Is it a chimney sweeping business Aunti?

Sorry I could not possbily comment

Ta1kinPeece · 16/08/2017 18:52

I got my first ever job after graduating from Uni
nowt has changed

ssd · 16/08/2017 18:57

I got my first ever job after graduating from Uni
nowt has changed

what utter drivel.

schokolade · 16/08/2017 19:00

I find a lot of people apathetic tbh, not just teenagers.

When I was a working teenager everybody moaned about teenagers. Always the way.

Timeywimey8 · 16/08/2017 19:00

I had a Saturday job from 15.

Some of the local supermarkets definitely employ under 18s at times as you have to wait for a supervisor if you're buying a bottle of wine. And the hairdressers have Saturday jobs.

But otherwise it's difficult, there isn't the range of work. And the wages are appalling. I can't really see the justification in paying a 16 year old less than a 20 year old. Or less than a 25 year old, if they are doing the same work.

Nomoreboomandbust · 16/08/2017 19:01

Ta1

You wouldn't have in our house petal

PortiaCastis · 16/08/2017 19:02

Seems to me that people love to disrespect other people's teens with sweeping generalisations

ssd · 16/08/2017 19:04

teens are easy pickings sometimes, once you have one living and working in your house you know the truth

Twinkie1 · 16/08/2017 19:04

My teenager would love to work. Does causal babysitting and a bit of waitressing when can get it, has applied for numerous jobs but no one ever bloody gets back to them. A grade student who has 2 glowing references too.

You're obviously employing the wrong teenagers!

gettingbacktoresearch · 16/08/2017 19:07

My now 18 year old son got a paper round at 13 and applied for a job at Waitrose just before his 16th birthday and was able to start that day.... he's now also got a part time job delivering pizzas to save for Uni as soon as he passed his driving test.

As a teen I only gave him £20 a month pocket money and bought the basics such as clothes and toiletries and food etc but he knew he needed to fund extras such as fancy clothes, trips out with mates, and at 17 paid for all his driving lessons.... his dad paid for his phone contract until he was 18 but that was it....

He's also mowed lawns for neighbours and walked dogs...

As a result he understands the value of money and knows he has to work hard for anything extra he wants! He has bought his own car and pays his own insurance for it too....

There are ways of making money out there and DD (7) knows she's gonna get some work when older too Grin