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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think a bottle of wine a week isn't too awful?

64 replies

MentalFuzz · 15/08/2017 17:46

Background: previously seriously alcoholic parents who have now gone teetotal.

I've never really been a drinker, possibly due to the background above.

But recently I have been getting another a week of the Aldi Australian shiraz wine because my mil bought me some about a month ago and I love the taste of it. So every Monday I have been buying a bottle of it during the weekly shop.

I have a glass every other night or so and my parter has some too. Sometime there is some left at the end of the week.

When I mentioned this to my dm she expressed concern for my 'increased drinking levels'.

It's hard for me to gauge what is normal, and I imagine it is for my dm and df too.

Would you be concerned about this amount of alcohol consumed every week for about a month?

OP posts:
WhatEaglesWear · 15/08/2017 18:15

Not awful at all!

dollydaydream114 · 15/08/2017 18:17

A bottle a week is fine. You have nothing to worry about.

If your mum is a recovering alcoholic I would probably not mention the subject of booze to her at all to be honest.

AnyFucker · 15/08/2017 18:19

It's lighthearted, soup

PyongyangKipperbang · 15/08/2017 18:20

It doesnt sound like your mum has ever had any idea about normal drinking amounts, its been either all or nothing for her. I can understand that she doesnt want you to end up like her and your dad but she is wrong that you are drinking worrying levels.

Easilyflattered · 15/08/2017 18:22

You've got nothing to worry about, you're drinking at the level we should all be drinking at if we chose to drink.

You're not binging, not exceeding government guidelines, and don't seem to be using wine as an emotional crutch.

LarkDescending · 15/08/2017 18:31

Not a problem at all.

If you wanted to gauge your drinking over time, the Drinkaware app is good. From what you've told us, on current levels you would find it reassuring Smile

LifeofClimb · 15/08/2017 18:36

Look at why you're drinking more, not the actual amount.

Your mum might know that you are stressed about something, and worried that you are relying on drink to de-stress. She's probably just worried you might be predisposed to using substances as a de-stresser.

If it's just that you like the taste and fancy it with dinner - it's such a small amount, that's fine.

SantasLittleMonkeyButler · 15/08/2017 18:41

Just to echo everyone else - a bottle a week is no problem whatsoever. Even more so if you are sharing it.

I suppose your DPs concern comes from the point of view of people who cannot have just one or two glasses. For them one bottle, may lead to one bottle more and so on and on... It may just be hard for them to understand how some people can literally have one glass. The alcoholics I have met all tended to lie about their intake - maybe they assume that all people who drink alcohol do this?

thinking12 · 15/08/2017 18:42

I have a bottle a night, and I'm no alcoholic. A bottle is only 3 glasses.
No problem at all.

Isetan · 15/08/2017 19:13

If you're under the recommended units for a week and you're not binging, then it isn't a problem. However, I can understand your parents concern because it's easy to fall into bad habits fairly easily without it registering.

SaS2014 · 15/08/2017 19:24

Standard bottle of wine is 10 units. Recommended max a week is 14, with at least 2 alcohol free days per week.

Long story short one bottle of wine per week for an adult is absolutely fine and well within acceptable limits/ guidelines.

hedgebitch · 15/08/2017 19:28

Your mum has a scary history with alcohol, it's understandable for her to be hypersensitive - but the amount you're drinking, and the reason for it, are fine and normal.

(Hopefully not too upsetting but as an anecdote to illustrate parental overreaction: I had dreadful depression as a teen and tried to kill myself when I was 15. DD7 wants a loft bed and I inwardly panicked and almost said no, just in case she tries to hang herself from the ladder bars in eight years' time. I still think I will have to steel myself to buy the bloody thing when her new room is ready. Normal stuff can look threatening in the wake of traumatic experience, but that doesn't mean it's a real threat.)

PollyFlint · 15/08/2017 19:29

A bottle of wine a week is very, very moderate drinking, nothing to worry about at all. You are absolutely fine.

I think if your mum is a recovering alcoholic I would probably steer clear of discussing booze with her. It's inevitably going to be a tricky subject for her and her view is never going to be objective. Much kudos to her and your dad for kicking their addiction, by the way.

DancesWithOtters · 15/08/2017 19:32

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

FelixtheMouse · 15/08/2017 19:35

You are drinking the way people should drink IMO.

wotabastard · 15/08/2017 19:39

@thinking12 a bottle a night...every night? That's a fuckload.

SoupDragon · 15/08/2017 23:06

It's lighthearted, soup

I don't think someone asking about how much they drink when they have alcoholic parents is lighthearted in the slightest and nothing in the OPs post indicates that they think it's something to laugh about.

Original poster
MentalFuzz · 16/08/2017 17:19

Sorry about that, had a busy night!

Thanks to all for your replies, I thought it was ok but as was said I can finally be it hard to gauge normal drinking, it seemed ok to me.

I just quite liked the taste of this wine, it's heavenly with a lasagne Grin

OP posts:
Nomoreboomandbust · 16/08/2017 17:23

I wish I was as restrained as you op.

OverTheHammer · 16/08/2017 17:26

I drink one bottle of red over Friday and Saturday evening. That, to me is practically tee-total 😂

I was verging on the alcoholic a year ago and could get through 4 bottles a week alongside lager. I'm proud of myself that I can make a bottle last two evenings now.

DancesWithOtters · 16/08/2017 21:28

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Buck3t · 16/08/2017 21:34

My dad is an alcoholic. I love the taste of alcohol, I very rarely drink and I have the seem reaction to my husband that likes a drink every other night. The problem is me not him.

titchy · 16/08/2017 21:37

Unless you're also necking a four-pack of Special Brew a night with 4 whisky chasers it's very very moderate - enjoy!

notevernotnevernotnohow · 16/08/2017 21:37

A bottle of wine between 2, a week?
I wouldn't see the problem if it was one a night.

CoveredInFondant · 16/08/2017 21:40

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

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