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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

That it all feels bleak

28 replies

misjudgement · 15/08/2017 15:12

I lost my job a few months ago - I wasn't sacked but was placed in an impossible position. I can't get another; I have tried.

Since then I have been working in a minimum wage capacity. It's 0 hours and so one week I can have a lot of hours then not many the week after. Even so I am really struggling to pay the mortgage and I think I might have to sell the house soon.

After the mortgage I have hardly anything, like as soon as I am paid I am left with nothing, not even £5.

When I do get work it mostly tends to be evenings and weekends so during the week I am sat at home a lot. I can't afford to go anywhere. Even if I could I have no one to go with. I did try probably foolishly to have a day out in the Lake District (I don't live all that far away) but seeing all the happy families just made me feel bad and upset me.

I just am so very alone. I know it will get better, not trying to say oh woe is me but right now it's pretty shit tbh!

OP posts:
MrMessy · 15/08/2017 15:17

Sorry things seem so bad. Do you have any family/friends to support you? I mean emotional support rather than financial.

OstentatiousWanking · 15/08/2017 15:19

I'm so sorry you are feeling so low.
Have you checked to see if you are entitled to any benefits while you are on such a low income?
I am in a similar situation and it does get on top of me at times.
Also it might be worth a trip to your GP. I suffer from depression. Your comment about seeing happy families while out and about struck a cord. When things I should smile at makes me feel bad it's one of my trigger signs that I need some medication to help me get back to myself.
Flowers I really hope things get better for you soon.

x2boys · 15/08/2017 15:20

What's your situation like do you have children a.partner? Are there any benefits you might be entitled too?

rainbowbreeze123 · 15/08/2017 15:20

Sorry youre feeling so low at the moment, could you check if youre entitled to a mortgage break ? Reduction in council tax ? As well as benefits

Original poster
misjudgement · 15/08/2017 15:32

No, no children or partner. Which makes it a thousand times harder (and yes I know there are bad relationships out there) but I can't put into words how alone I am. And no, no benefits. Rightly so, I mean. I'm not starving, bills are roughly speaking up to date. But no wriggle room, at all. And when you can be spending 3, 4 days a week completely alone that's tough.

OP posts:
AfunaMbatata · 15/08/2017 15:34

Have you thought about joining a rambling club? There must be many close by the Lake District. It would be a good way to get out and enjoy some company.

rainbowbreeze123 · 15/08/2017 15:45

Can you volunteer at all when you have all this free time ? Lots of places are crying out for volunteers

Original poster
misjudgement · 15/08/2017 15:50

I'm not all that close to the Lakes - close enough for a day trip once.

Rainbow but I do have to be available to take work if it comes in. I do volunteer though. It doesn't help. I don't think I want or need stuff to do. It's all just time-filling really.

OP posts:
YorkieDorkie · 15/08/2017 16:07

Sorry you're having a hard time OP. Can you give any indication of your job sector/skill set?

Original poster
misjudgement · 15/08/2017 16:11

I was in teaching Smile

OP posts:
ollieplimsoles · 15/08/2017 16:19

Sorry this has happened op, could you tutor privately? Set up your own business?

NotPennysBoat815 · 15/08/2017 16:21

Sorry OP. We are really struggling right now as well. We can't even treat ourselves to a chocolate bar ATM. Could you treat yourself to a nice meal once a week? Something to look forward to.

peachgreen · 15/08/2017 16:22

If you were in teaching can you not do supply? (Come September, obviously.) At least that would give you a slightly more reliable income (well, depending on positions, but they're desperate for supply everywhere I've ever lived - DH used to do it). Then you've just got the rest of August to get through.

Or if you don't want to do supply, can you sign up with some temping agencies? You're more likely to get a better-paid admin role that way, which would at least guarantee you a week's work at a time probably.

I really feel for you - unemployment is crushing.

Original poster
misjudgement · 15/08/2017 16:23

I will be doing peach and trying a bit of tutoring. It's still unreliable and lonely though, but admittedly better paid unreliability and loneliness Smile

OP posts:
YorkieDorkie · 15/08/2017 16:51

I'm a teacher OP and got a lot of work with the right agency and barely any with the wrong one. Do you have a branch or Celsian near you? They pay over the average and had more work than others. Hang in there Flowers

barefoofdoctor · 15/08/2017 17:35

When I was on the bones of my arse I sold a few bits of clothing on ebay (vintage clothing type stuff), then used that money to do the same buying from charity shops. I now do this whenever I need a boost to my income (it can add up quickly though you have to deal with some twattishness from buyers).

Hope this doesn't sound too daft but could you borrow someone's dog (I believe there is a website for this?). I've found dog walking to be the best way to get chatting to/walking with/becoming friends with people as an adult. Also, give the doctors a whirl. Medication can really help you see things in a different light. Also, you own a house! Even if you are scratching the mortgage payments together you are in a position many people can only dream of!

Fixmylife · 15/08/2017 17:46

Do you have a spare room? You could rent it out as a way to get money and company...

NearlyFree17 · 15/08/2017 18:15

Borrowmydoggy is the website -that's a great idea.

Or set up as a dog walker/sitter and make a few quid, kill two birds with one stone?

Original poster
misjudgement · 15/08/2017 18:25

I like dogs but you have to pay to register with borrowmydoggy. In any case, I don't know, I do appreciate the suggestions but it wasn't exactly needing things to do. Sometimes I do, but it's hard to make any concrete plans right now.

OP posts:
Original poster
misjudgement · 15/08/2017 20:53

More than anything what I need is something to achieve. But that can be a long process I suppose!

OP posts:
junebirthdaygirl · 15/08/2017 21:03

Came on to say rent a room too. Or airbb if you live in a nice area.
I hope you have a breakthrough soon. Have you family to support you. My answer is these situations is go to your family as that is what l would want my dc to do.

Original poster
misjudgement · 15/08/2017 21:10

Sadly no.

OP posts:
ImperialBlether · 15/08/2017 21:12

Have you looked at The Lady? There are live in jobs there, if you need to sell your house.

ImperialBlether · 15/08/2017 21:13

Could you do supply teaching?

RandomMess · 15/08/2017 21:18

Do you have a spare room? Think it's £70 per week tax free?