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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To ask this ....

89 replies

ReallyWanttowinthelottery · 06/08/2017 17:31

If you are rich, and you believe money doesn't buy you happiness, can you please give me your money?

Specifically, if you are loaded and think you are no happier now than you were before you were loaded, I am more than happy to take some cash off you!!

I am fed up of hearing people say money doesn't buy u happiness!!! I have the best DH in the world, two fantastic children and I like my house. But .... I would be happier if I had more money!!! .... I could fix my stupid leaky tap, work less (or better still, b a stay at home mum to my wonderful kids till they r a bit older), I could take my children to the legoland hotel for a night, I could decorate my bedroom, I could pay off my massive credit card bill! And ... I could feel less stressed about money more generally! Sure ... maybe millions don't make you happier - but having enough not to be in debt, and to be comfortable - surely that does!!

OP posts:

missiondecision · 07/08/2017 10:06

I've been poor. Very.
I'm not rich but I'm not poor
I prefer the latter.

missiondecision · 07/08/2017 10:10

To some degree it's hard work. Not entirely.
It really helps if you have a personality that can cope with risk without being reckless.

abigcupoffuckyou · 07/08/2017 12:13

I first posted on this thread on the anniversary of my sons still birth. It is hugely dismissive and callous to have it suggested that it's easier for me to deal with that grief because I'm not wondering where my next £10 is coming from

I really don't think that's fair, tbh. I didn't say anything about dealing with grief, but if you have money so you don't have to worry about that on top of everything else it is that tiny bit easier. I know when my mother died suddenly that the problem of how to pay for a funeral was a huge worry on top of the grief, and the debt I was left with afterwards was also an added worry.

It's not a grief competition. But its not contraversial to suggest that not having the money to pay for the necessaries is an added issue.
Sorry for your loss.

theymademejoin · 07/08/2017 12:38

The Terrible People
by Ogden Nash

People who have what they want are very fond of telling people who haven't what they want that they really don't want it,
And I wish I could afford to gather all such people into a gloomy castle on the Danube and hire half a dozen capable Draculas to haunt it.
I dont' mind their having a lot of money, and I don't care how they employ it,
But I do think that they damn well ought to admit they enjoy it.
But no, they insist on being stealthy
About the pleasures of being wealthy,
And the possession of a handsome annuity
Makes them think that to say how hard it is to make both ends meet is their bounden duity.
You cannot conceive of an occasion
Which will find them without some suitable evasion.
Yes indeed, with argumetsn they are very fecund;
Their first point is that money isn't everything, and that they have no money anyhow is their second.
Some people's money is merited,
And other people's is inherited,
But wherever it comes from,
They talk about it as if it were something you got pink gums from.
Perhaps indeed the possession of wealth is constantly distressing,
But I should be quite willing to assume every curse of wealth if I could at the same time assume every blessing.
The only incurable troubles of the rich are the troubles that money can't cure,
Which is a kind of trouble that is even more troublesome if you are poor.
Certainly there are lots of things in life that money won't buy, but it's very funny --
Have you ever tried to buy them without money?

FlappyFish · 07/08/2017 12:47

Money buys material things, not happiness.

But I am not denying life is happier with the money to make choices.

abigcupoffuckyou · 07/08/2017 12:50

Money buys material things, not happiness

Money can also buy experiences, which can certainly equate to happiness. It can also provide for your children, again, that can make a parent very happy.

FlappyFish · 07/08/2017 12:53

That's true, actually. Didn't think of it that way.

andintothefire · 07/08/2017 12:53

Money buys you security. The problem with housing costs now is that you need so much money to have a secure home.

I don't think foreign holidays / expensive clothes are really a part of the happiness equation to be honest. I think they provide transient moments of pleasure, compared to the more important sense of security that money can buy.

abigcupoffuckyou · 07/08/2017 12:55

I don't think foreign holidays / expensive clothes are really a part of the happiness equation to be honest. I think they provide transient moments of pleasure

The travelling I've done has made me very happy, and looking back on it years later still makes me happy. Certainly not a transient moment of pleasure.

AlmostAJillSandwich · 07/08/2017 13:01

But money cant buy you the important things. It cant buy love or health. Imagine the begging letters they get, the guilt trips for not giving away money to every tom dick and harry that asks, to wonder with EVERY person you meet if they want to be your friend/partner because of who you are, or just the money. I can imagine it being really stressful and hard to trust, unless you meet another rich person you will always question if money is a factor in their wanting to be with you. And illness and disease doesnt care if youre rich or poor. It gives them super expensive private treatment as an option but it wont prevent ill health.

Id take being poor and just getting by with genuine family and friends and good health over millions any day.

abigcupoffuckyou · 07/08/2017 13:09

But money cant buy you the important things. It cant buy love or health

You sure about that? Money can buy you private health insurance and private care. Money can buy you better food and more access to many aspects of health. Rich people tend to be healthier, poor people die younger.
Love? Money can buy you access to a lot. Money can help you meet more people. Money can let you have more fun together. LAck of money can kill relationships.

bogofeternalstench · 07/08/2017 13:20

Someone's comment earlier proves it's all relative. They said a £75k income was where money stopped making you happier (to paraphrase) and that earning that amount wasn't being rich.

A £75k income seems like riches beyond belief to me. If I earned that much I would be so much less stressed. No worries about debts or paying the bills each month. No worries about how I'm going to afford the credit card repayments when we have to renew my husbands visa later this year. Being able to escape the shitty area we live in with it's antisocial yobs and litter. Even if just for a weekend break camping or in a b&b every now and then. Being able to afford to have children.

I guarantee all those things would make me far happier than I am at the moment.

DCFlemingreportingforduty · 08/08/2017 18:19

theymade me join, that poem is a delight.

Gingernaut · 08/08/2017 18:30

Money can settle debts which can relieve stress.

Money can pay for good quality housing which can relieve stress and ease life in general.

Money can pay for medical treatment and services.

Money can pay for education ensuring you or the next generation can get a step up in life.

Money can employ people.

Spending money can help keep shops open and keep people in jobs.

Money can pay for holidays, concert and gig tickets and excursions.

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