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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Doctor's appointment

537 replies

10greenapples · 04/08/2017 12:03

I missed a drs appointment for my dd as I just wasn't going to make it on time. Anyway today I recieved a letter which says if one more appointment is missed she won't be allowed another one for 6 months! We can cancel an appointment but need to give an hours notice. So we will only be seen at the walk in if another is missed which is 8am-11am and a 2 hour wait. Aibu in thinking this seems pretty harsh?!

OP posts:
Floggingmolly · 04/08/2017 13:57

You're still not getting what you did wrong, op... You sound devoid of any social graces whatsoever, God love you

MommaGee · 04/08/2017 14:00

give me another example of where you can "get yourself in trouble" for not being able to make a phone call?!
Car breaking down on a road where you can't otherwise call for help
Medical emergency with child whereby you need to call an ambulance
Any appointment you might be late for because of traffic

Starflame · 04/08/2017 14:01

It seems you already know they were reasonable to send a letter. As an adult you should be more organised for these things. If you were so concerned about her health you would have ensured you left with plenty of time to attend the appointment. You do not seem very organised or have taken this appointment seriously. You are making excuses for your lack of organisation. Get your sh*t together

abigcupoffuckyou · 04/08/2017 14:01

All gp appointments are not threatening

What does that mean?

paddlingwhenIshouldbeworking · 04/08/2017 14:02

Of course not all GP appointments are non life threatening. People are frequently referred directly to hospital from GP to hospital. Last appointment DD was blue-lighted from one to the other.

ilovesooty · 04/08/2017 14:03

Perhaps she means that not all doctors appointments are for life threatening conditions.

SilverBirchTree · 04/08/2017 14:03

Yep, I'm out. Back to work so I can continue to cheerfully pay the taxes that fund this crucial service for OP, whether she respects it or not.

PutItOnYourPancake · 04/08/2017 14:03

Totally. Entitled.

You didn't see why you should return home to make the call - fine, your call, despite it being rude. But as a consequence - and as an adult, there are consequences for actions - your surgery sent you a perfectly reasonable letter, reminding you what the consequence is for not attending pre-booked appointments.

wheresmyphone · 04/08/2017 14:03

YABU.

Common manners. You made an appointment. You were a no show. Bad manners plain and simple.

Lweji · 04/08/2017 14:03

It's not harsh.

It only happens if you miss another appointment and it's for 6 months, not forever, and she'd be seen at the walk in.

It seems perfectly reasonable to try to limit the number of no shows.

Beebee7 · 04/08/2017 14:04

It's understandable OP that you feel it's harsh, as I know you didn't miss it because you couldn't be arsed/didn't care. (In fact, most people probably don't do that!) But it costs some twenty quid or so for each appointment missed, and it's very frustrating for the surgery who (probably) has their own budget, and struggles anyway.

A very good pal of mine is a doctor and he says the head doctor of the surgery pays for and has to budget for EVERYTHING. Drugs, specialist care (physio/mental health care etc,) rent for the building, bills, salaries for receptionists, doctors, practice nurses, all supplies like furniture and stationary and computers etc for the practice. Look at ANYthing in your surgery next time you go, ANY item, and the person/head doctor who runs the surgery has had to account for that in his budget. And he also has to budget for appointment times.

So I can understand your doctor getting snitty. It's an annoyance at best when people miss appointments, and a financial burden at worst.

Our head doctor gets frustrated because he finds it almost impossible to ban people though, as we are the only surgery for 15 miles. (It's a rural area.) And some people cannot drive. He said he is tempted to introduce a 'charge a tenner when you miss an appointment' system. I bet a lot less appointments would be missed then!

PLEASE try not to miss anymore.

ilovesooty · 04/08/2017 14:04

Sorry cross post.
Doesn't excuse the OP's lack of manners though.

RhubardGin · 04/08/2017 14:09

I'll assume your DD had a cough/cold viral type symptoms then?

Why did you feel the need to contact your DSis. If she hadn't suggested going to the pharmacy what would you have done, A&E??

Your general attitude stinks btw.

Original poster
10greenapples · 04/08/2017 14:09

Well my cars not gonna break down as I don't have one. And if my child needed an ambulance I would call 999 which is free. Anyway someone said I should only go to the pharmcy next time unless it's life threatening which doesn't make sense as all gp appointments are for non life threatening things, otherwise you go to a&e.

OP posts:
Beebee7 · 04/08/2017 14:09

Just wanted to say, each GP appointment missed, costs around £50-55, not £20 like I first said! Sorry, I was getting it mixed up with what the pharmacy gets if they do a medicine usage review on a customer.

Original poster
10greenapples · 04/08/2017 14:10

No she woke up and her eye was swollen up she could barely open it, I wouldn't have went a&e no, I would have rearranged.

OP posts:
Beebee7 · 04/08/2017 14:10

OP, even if you can only give half hour's notice, it's good to cancel, because some people are waiting on tenterhooks for an appointment and will appreciate it, even if they only get 25 to 20 minutes notice.

Ceto · 04/08/2017 14:11

I would say - I know other people (mainly older) who do not have phones, so they pre-plan, and for example if heading out to the doctors, will ring the surgery as they are leaving (from their landline) to let them know they are on their way, and ring as soon as theya re able to from a landline if there is any issue.

Come off it. Phone in doctors' receptions are constantly ringing: why would said people delay starting off to make a pointless call like that? If they really do it, I bet the receptionists hate them for wasting their time. I work in an environment where people make appointments to see me, none of them ever phone to tell me when they're starting off and frankly I don't want them to.

Ceto · 04/08/2017 14:13

OP, I suggest a grovelly reply explaining what happened - if possible back it up with a print-off of any traffic or news report about the accident - apologise, and ask to be taken off the naughty list. It might just work.

RhubardGin · 04/08/2017 14:13

Anyway someone said I should only go to the pharmcy next time unless it's life threatening

That was me and I didn't say that. I said that it's usually best to see a Pharmacist before using up a Dr's appt unless you felt the need for an ongoing issue, referral to hospital or non over the counter medication.

In my surgery they advise not to make appointment for minor ailments without going to a pharmacy first.

WeAllHaveWings · 04/08/2017 14:16

10 you appear to have been living on another planet and don't know how to use the NHS and other services available to you.

NHS direct (call 111) and pharmacies should be your first port of call for minor ailments like you dd had and a precious GP appointment that someone might have genuinely needed would not have been wasted.

If you were late for picking up a lottery win would you have not called/shown up late to explain? If you had been late for meeting a friend would you have not bothered to call and just went on about your business? Obviously not, you should treat your GP's surgery and the people who work there with the same respect. I cannot believe if didn't occur to you the correct thing to do would be to call them and apologise!

While YANBU to be unavoidably late, you absolutely deserve that letter and the consequence for your total lack on consideration for an under resourced health service and the people that work there. It will be your dd which wont be able to get an appointment when she is genuinely in need of seeing a GP so it is her that will suffer, not you.

Lets hope your dd is raised with better manners than you were (although its looks like that will be difficult in the circumstances).

taratill · 04/08/2017 14:16

OP YABVU, it costs the NHS money if you do not turn up on time.

I personally think that the NHS should consider charging for missed GP (and other appointments).

That way patients might not take our free at the point of access system for granted.

taratill · 04/08/2017 14:17

Sorry should say if you do not turn up at all

caffeinestream · 04/08/2017 14:17

Well, why waste a GP appointment if you don't have to? Pharmacists will see you then and there, and can then advise if you need to book a GP appointment.

Lots of things don't need a GP but need medical advice - our pharmacy has a sign up saying if you have (insert long list of conditions here) then you can come and see them for treatment, not to go and waste a GP appointment.

Lots of GP appointments ARE necessary - things like smear tests, getting check ups, blood tests, diabetes check ups - they're not inherently life-threatening but do need a doctor/nurse appointment.

Things like upset stomachs, colds, headaches, various infections etc. don't need a GP appointment and can be dealt with over the county by the pharmacist.

I was at my local pharmacy collecting a prescription yesterday and a teenage girl came in for advice - the pharmacist saw her and gave her something to help. There was no need for her to waste a GP appointment.

coddiwomple · 04/08/2017 14:17

OP, how is the surgery supposed to know you were on your way stuck in traffic if you never rang them? Do you expect them to guess why people don't turn up?

One minute, you are driving, the next you are in the bus.
One minute you don't have a phone, the next you are on whatsapp.

This is getting silly.

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