To let 4 month old lie in til 10-11am?

[Goldfishshoals]

We have a 4 month old baby - our first so we have no idea what we're doing!

Despite efforts to encourage her to sleep earlier in the evening, she just won't go to sleep and stay that way til 9-10pm. She then sleeps a good 12-13 hours with a couple of half-asleep feeds every 4-5 hours or so.

Husband thinks we should be waking her up in the morning, he thinks we will have problems with getting her up for school etc. in the future if we don't deal with this now, and that if we force her awake earlier she will start to sleep earlier.

I think we should be thanking our lucky stars that she sleeps so well, enjoy the fact that we can still have weekend lie ins (it's me not him that's going to have to get up if she starts waking earlier), and not stress ourselves out trying to change things. Aibu?

My DD was just like this. Until she was 3 ish she loved a long lie, and had a long afternoon nap too.

She's 7 now and full of energy, and only doesn't get a long lie because her noisy little sister wakes her up. I can tell she'll be a teenager who loves her bed though.

Just go with it, I say.

Never wake a sleeping baby haha! I wish my 4 month old would sleep that late! She goes to bed at 8, wakes up around 3 for a full feed and then is up by 7 at the latest. My 3yr old goes to bed at 7 and sleeps through unless he needs a wee and he's up by 6, he is quite happy been given toys/iPad/jigsaws to do in his room for a while but just as I drop back off the baby wakes up, would love just an extra hour so I have more energy for them both!

If he wants you to wake baby up earlier make a deal, you do it in the week while he works and he does it on the weekend while you get to catch up on sleep, he will soon stop it ha

My DS1 had a phase of this as a tiny baby - he would cluster feed manically all evening and not fall asleep until midnight or thereabouts, but would then sleep (well, waking for feeds pretty often but falling asleep again afterwards) until 11am or so. It was good, apart from all the baby groups etc started at 9.30/10 so we could never get to them! Of course the pattern did change, but interestingly now at 7 he is still a night owl, never asleep before 10/10.30.

I really value an evening to myself - I don't think Sids guidelines prevent that. Even if the baby is sleeping nearby you can still relax and get on with what you want, you don't need to watch the baby sleep.

Let her sleep in. My eldest used to sleep until 10 as a baby with one feed in the small hours (7pm bedtime too!!) but now she's 6 and up at 7 every morning.

Having a baby that sleeps well is a real stroke of luck so enjoy it

Only a mad person wakes a happily sleeping baby.

Let her sleep. My twins were like this, slept late in the morning - Gina Ford wanted me to have them both up and ready by 7, after two mornings of this I seriously doubted my intelligence and wondered wtf I was waking sleeping twins for!

Never ever wake a sleeping baby. Cant believe your dh is worrying about school for a 4 month old!

Don't do it! My almost 2 year old gets up at 5am!!!

Enjoy it whilst it lasts.

If you want her to down earlier then yes you will have to start getting her up earlier. Try 30 minutes earlier a day with bedtime 30 minutes earlier per day. What time is her last Nap?
If you're happy with the lie in then just leave it til she's older.

Well I would have woken my DS because that routine wouldn't have worked for me. All the baby groups etc were in the morning as others have said. And I preferred getting him to bed earlier and having peaceful evenings with DH. But if it works for you then it's fine - of course she won't still be sleeping in until 11am when she's 4. Give her a few months and she'll probably be up at 5am with the larks and your DH will be longing for the lie ins again!

For the love of all things let your baby sleep! Our first went through a phase of getting up at 4:30 / 5am. Yours may. She may not. But for the sake of all of us who can't, please please please make the most of it!

Let her sleep and enjoy the lie in! My DD was in a similar pattern at 4 months, she's 8 nearly 9 months now and the pattern has changed completely! Enjoy it while it lasts.

If he's insistent however I would tell him he can deal with the fall out. A few hours of a sleepy cranky baby screeching down his ear and he'll soon learn never to wake a sleeping baby.

Nope, let her sleep! My DD was exactly the same at that age - went to bed with us about 10ish, up to feed a few times in the night and would usually wake about 7am. After a feed she'd sleep to 9-10am so I got up and got some work done. She's almost 2 now and up every morning between 6.30-7am.

My nephew used to sleep 10-10, I was so jealous with a 10-7 sleeper

When you have school/nursery runs and other children to juggle you will find a different routine.

Make the most of it.
Way too early to be thinking about
School

4 months old? DS2 was still sleeping on my lap till I went to bed at 1030pm at that age. Agree with pp that her sleep patterns will change so many times, teething/regressions/growth spurts/nap changes, that you can either spend endless hours fighting against it or you can relax and go with the flow. DS1, 13 and DS2, almost 2 have always slept well, always had 10/11 hours. Normally 9-7 for DS2 at the moment. DS1 has never had any problem getting up for school but it wouldn't even have crossed my mind at 4 months!

Never wake a sleeping baby. First rule of parenting. My DD used to sleep 8pm-8am and then have a feed then sleep til 10am. It was bliss. Now she does 8pm-8am consistently at 4 months old and thats fine by me. But if she slept midnight til 11am that would be fine too. Leave her to it ignore your DH.

Defo let baby (and you) sleep in. That's only of the main benefits of first child! Your husband sounds like he doesn't really know what he's talking about I'm afraid. My son was exactly the same at 4 months, and now he is 5 he gets up between 6 -7am every day and goes to bed 7-7.30am.

Im also wildly jealous

Sorry! I realise in hindsight that my post could have come across as a stealth boast.

you can either spend endless hours fighting against it or you can relax and go with the flow

That's pretty much my thoughts. The lie ins are definitely working for me, and an earlier bedtime for her would just mean I got less sleep (because I wouldn't be going to bed any earlier) - just my husband manages to make me doubt I'm doing the best thing for her .

Thanks everyone! I'll report back in a few years if our decision ruins her schooling

im going against the grain and would say wake baby at 730 and within a few days/week tops her sleeping pattern will change

she is doing 12hrs, just 9/10pm - 9/10am

but i like my evening to myself - my 4mth does 7pm/7/730am

but if you find 9/9 works then dont worry till she is heading to 3 and nursery but bet her sleeping will chnage before then

At 4mo they should be sleeping in the same room as you anyways so why not just do the 9/10 - 9/10 thing. Once she is past 6 months and you start putting her to sleep alone fair enough. Just let yourselves have another couple of months.

If its you who is going to have to get up and do the looking after of the baby then YOU decide

Bless him.
Show him the thread.

Let the baby sleep. You won't have the same issue in 4yrs time
DD was like this at 4mo. Now she wakes latest of 6am most days (7:30 if we are lucky at the weekend). She goes to bed at 6:30/6:45 which we had in place since about 6months old which I think is good for her

Go with it ! 4 month old ain't having a " lie in " its sleeping between feeds .

Believe me now this will bare no resemblance on getting up for school !

Enjoy it