Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To go part time

59 replies

Depressedanduseless · 30/07/2017 17:08

I work full time in a really stressful job, earning 30k.

I have a 4 year old DS, who is due to start school in sept, so childcare costs will go down.

DP earns much less - £23k.

We've just bought a house - mortgage 638 pm.

I have talked to my boss about dropping to 30 hours per week, very affordable. He says no. I can either drop to 18.5 or I have to do full time.

I also receive £200 per month in maintenance from exH.

We could just about manage if I was doing 18.5, and I mean just about. This includes paying of a small amount of debt (3k) at £150 per month. There would be no treats, nothing for savings. But I've been a single parent and this would be the same income as when I was on my own...

We would not be entitled to any tax credits or things.

I am so, so stressed. I want to be there for my little boy. I hate working full time.

BUT we would like to have another baby in the next couple of years, so is it just a terrible time??

AIBU to think we could make it work?

OP posts:
honeylulu · 30/07/2017 17:10

It would make more sense for your partner to go full time. Will he consider that?

HunterHearstHelmsley · 30/07/2017 17:11

I'm assuming her partner is already working full time.

SpartacusSaiman · 30/07/2017 17:11

Honestly if it gave no money for any left overs, i wouldnt.

What if something goes wrong, boiler breaks, car breaks, dh has to go off sick etc.

I would wait until the debt is clear and you have anothrr babym save money and then do it after mat leave with the new baby.

Original poster
Depressedanduseless · 30/07/2017 17:12

He already works full time. His job is just poorly paid. (Same as mine but I'm qualified and he is not)

OP posts:
Original poster
Depressedanduseless · 30/07/2017 17:13

I'm worried if I don't do something soon I'll end up signed off, and I really don't want that

OP posts:
Hunted68 · 30/07/2017 17:13

Partners is full time I would assume. I would say it's a bad idea with a planned baby and maternity leave in the not too distant future. Save hard, pay off debt, get used to living on what you would have if you did it.

Queenioqueenio · 30/07/2017 17:13

If you reduce to 18.5 hrs are 'just about' managing with money, bear in mind this will bring a different kind of stress, and may wipe out any benefit of removing stress from work by dropping your hours. Can you look for a different job ?

Hunted68 · 30/07/2017 17:14

Saying that if your health is suffering maybe you have no option. What about doing part time and then getting a bar/shift job a couple of nights a week or something to pay for treats.

BeepBeepMOVE · 30/07/2017 17:15

Can you work full time but spend as though you are doing 18.5 hours for a few extra months and pay off debt in full before dropping hours?

That would give you the extra £150 a month and you can imagine how living on the wage would work in reality.

Original poster
Depressedanduseless · 30/07/2017 17:15

It's actually a good idea to work out the budget for if I was on that income.

The thing is, childcare right now is £600per month
When he starts school, it will be around £200, but if I was part time there would be no childcare cost at all

OP posts:
honeylulu · 30/07/2017 17:16

Sorry I meant could your partner contemplate going PART time, sorry. As he's the lower earner it would be less of a drop in income iyswim.

BeepBeepMOVE · 30/07/2017 17:17

I would worry about not saving any money for if a health crisis occurred and neither you or DP could work for a prolonged time or if the boiler broke- general emergency funds. Would you be able to afford another baby on 2 low salaries?

Dixiechickonhols · 30/07/2017 17:18

Is there any scope to pick more work up easily elsewhere. Eg if you are a teacher do 18.5 in your job and do another day a week supply.

Is there any scope to buy more holiday or even just take unpaid parental leave. So stay full time but actually work more like the 30 hours you want due to extra time off.

SpartacusSaiman · 30/07/2017 17:18

Even if childcare disappears, you will be on 15k less. At £200 thats 2.4k saved. So you are still down 12.6k.

The answer might be to look for a new job, different employer etc

How will you afford another child if you have no money left?

Does your do do his fair share at home? Can you do something that relives some stress without dropping income?

Original poster
Depressedanduseless · 30/07/2017 17:18

honey

He could I guess... but he isn't DS's Dad so doesn't feel fair to make him do the bulk parenting, and it's me that is struggling with working full time, he likes it.

OP posts:
GreeboIsACutePussPuss · 30/07/2017 17:18

Is looking at other jobs an option? just because your boss won't offer you 30 hours doesn't mean there aren't other employers in the same field that would.

I cope on a lot less money, it is doable, I wouldn't choose to do it though.

HemmieH · 30/07/2017 17:18

Have you discussed this with work? I always planned work part time after baby but work couldn't facilitate it.

HemmieH · 30/07/2017 17:19

I apologise I didn't read your first post properly. O

MaverickSnoopy · 30/07/2017 17:20

Here's what I would do. Stay full time and start trying to get pregnant. Obviously only because you said it's on the cards. I would save my backside off during this time (pretending I was working 18.5). Knowing you're about to go on mat leave does make the stress easier....or it did for me when I was in a similar situation. Then you have a year of savings to live off along with smp for 9 months and you can use some of the time to find a new job. Obviously the time might not be right for a baby. Bear in mind that it you take the drop now then it will be harder to save for a baby.

Original poster
Depressedanduseless · 30/07/2017 17:21

spartacus

He does loads, yes.
We do things to help lighten the load too - cleaner once a week.

The trouble with my job (social worker) is that anything else I wanted to do that I'd be any good at without going back to uni would be much lower paid and more like DPs role so I'd take a huge pay cut anyway

OP posts:
NC4now · 30/07/2017 17:22

Is there any scope for DP to qualify and increase his wage, to take up some of the slack?

dudsville · 30/07/2017 17:22

But you wouldn't be on half pay for half your hours. Isn't it the case that tax doesn't kick in until a certain amount of income and then you only get taxed on what you make above that? When I dropped a 10th of my work week I lost only a 15th of my pay.

Original poster
Depressedanduseless · 30/07/2017 17:22

NC, yup, work will put him on the degree next year or year after (v competitive in this LA) but that's then another 3 years

OP posts:
Fuzzyduck21 · 30/07/2017 17:23

^^^ I'd do the same if I was thinking about a baby anyway x

ALittleMop · 30/07/2017 17:23

I am so, so stressed. I want to be there for my little boy. I hate working full time.

Do a budget - a proper, no place to hide one
Can you look for another job - is it this job or all jobs like the one you do (are you a teacher?)
Will/can your partner qualify and thus increase his earning potential?

Swipe left for the next trending thread