Sick of always being skint!

[user1490465531]

Just this really. I know it is true for many families but as a lone parent by the time I pay bills and other outgoings I'm always living in my overdraft by the end of the month.
I work and do receive help with rent etc but it never seems enough and now with the summer holidays I find myself racking my brains trying to find cheap or free things to do but it's miserable never being able to afford a treat or go on a day out without counting the pennies.
I receive no maintenance from dd dad as he's in prison so it's me providing everything.
For example I'm desparate for a new bed but looking at the prices I know it would take ages to save and I feel sad that right now life just feels like a constant battle and I'm tired of it TBH.
AIBU to feel this way or should I just suck it up like I'm sure many have to.

Barbara being a working Londoner doesn't automatically equal having a travelcard, or having one that covers tubes. I travel to work by bus and pay as I go with Oyster so spend £50-60 less per month than I would if I had a travelcard. So trips with DC have to be carefully considered as it's extra travelling cost.

But agree there are great things to do in London for free if travel isn't too much of a barrier. Museums, parks, farms, galleries, lots of free activities over holidays etc.

Op I sympathise, not in the same position but we're in London with DC on just one salary. Food budget is very small and barely any spending money after bills. It's doable and we try to make it fun by challenging ourselves but it can be unrelentingly depressing never to be able to afford clothes, treats, haircuts and so on.

Definitely check out Freecycle. Don't be scared of asking friends and family too - we got a free bed for DS from a friend who was moving.

And yyy to selling things on for a bit of extra cash but beware seller fees if using eBay, best to put money aside until you get your monthly fee statement and know how much they'll take back. No fees on gumtree or FB local pages.

I really sympathise. I brought up my daughter alone in London and we never had any money.

But if (& I know it's a big if) you can afford bus fares there are some good ideas here
www.timeout.com/london/kids/101-things-to-do-in-London-with-kids-free-activities

Packed lunch essential of course! And bottles of water / flasks of coffee.

It does get depressing, I remember it well. Especially if there's no chance of getting away.
I hope you manage to enjoy some of the holiday.

It's hard. My 9 year old loves arts and crafts. You can get cheap sets in Pound shops. In nice weather it is easier as she will happily play in the garden or we walk to the park.

Skint too. I think the hardest part is the inevitable children asking for things part, the longing looks towards the gift shop or the cafe. Museums may be free but if you can get from home, there and back again without spending a single penny then you are a stronger woman than I. I grew up skint too so I know how much I longed to have a hot chocolate in the cafe or even have a sandwich in a box!

I'm in a similar position and have been for years - it's miserable. I do now work ft but loss of tax credits etc mean I've not felt any benefit. I need my car to get to work and am dreading it dying - I can't replace items round the house that normal people would deem essential because I need to keep the option of loan/credit cards free for when that happens. No real advice OP, I'm sure you're doing all you can already but you do have my sympathy

Freecycle is great- I put something on there and have been getting updates on stuff available and it's quite amazing what people give away.! You can also ask if anyone has a certain item if there's something you need.
Don't know which part of London you are in but where we are there's a weekly free event list for kids and also an adventure playground where low income/ single parents get free/ discounted passes.
Also does your dd have a blue peter badge? You get in free to tons of places and working for one takes up some time too.
My 9yo got one for building a BP themed sandcastle and writing a poem about it so no cost

You need to get your CV in top shape and start applying for roles that have more chance to develop. You're in London where there are so many different opportunities. You might not be earning more to begin with, but you also won't need to retrain beforehand. There are loads of places you can go starting in admin. Get in somewhere, roll your sleeves up and get stuck in. I'm not saying that's not what you do now but you need to try to move away from shift based work toward something salaried if you want to grow your earning potential.

Those saying 'retrain' or 'get a better job' obviously don't understand how tax credits work. I used to be on minimum wage and got £450 a month tax credits, I now earn £12 an hour but don't get any tax credits and I have to pay for childcare as no longer working weekends so have to pay for nursery when my mum previously had dc on Saturdays. It's not made any difference to my financial situation.

The point of saying get a better job is that a salaried role with scope to move up will increase earning power over time. Stay on a hourly rate shift job and that will never happen. It's about the long term, and children don't need childcare forever.

Another in the same boat. Over the last 8 years I've tried doing extra training, moving to jobs where I thought there might be a chance of promotion but nope - still on a poor wage and have just had current job prospects crapped all over by current boss (long boring story). I work 40 hours a week and I'm desperate to get off tax credits before they come to an end - I've never liked being on them.
Every time your pay does increase rightly so they go down, but the downside is that I'm still trying to live on the same amount of money that I was doing 8 years ago and with prices increasing (and even the Statistics Office have confirmed packet size shrinkage) it's getting harder and harder. It's far from a lavish lifestyle I lead and I worry so much I cry often with worry but when you have tried everything to escape this treadmill and nothing has worked your options start disappearing. When all my friends will be starting to wind down I know when I am 53 I'm going to have to see if any pub will let me barmaid or waitress to try to make up some of the cash

sadly being a single parent does often leave you in a trap.
Hopefully when my dd starts secondary school I can move full time in a better job.
I think the government need to offer more incentives for lone parents to work more hours instead they want to keep you in the poverty trap by taking away any extra you earn so you can live on the bare minimum they deemail appropriate.
Living in London is very expensive and unless you have a good job minimum wage jobs are still very common here.

Hi OP, sorry to hear this. It is so unfair.

I am aware you said you need to count every penny, but could you join a credit union, even saving a very small amount? I assume there would be brilliant ones in london. I'm up north, but our local credit union provides loans for beds, white goods, computers etc.

You have to prove that you can save regularly to be eligible though. Even if it's just a few quid a month.

I know people are often tempted into these payday loans and brighthouse places etc., which are basically there to exploit vulnerable people.

I used to work for the credit union and I seen first hand how it helped people.

You can work more and it doesn't affect tax credits not loads extra it might be worth checking. Have you any Tesco or nectar points?? I've just conveyed 1000 points into 2 pizzas at pizza express and another 1000 into 2 vue cinema tickets. I'm a single mum I do surveys online and one of the pays in nectar points.
Kids club at the cinema is always cheap.
If you want any info on the survey sites feel free to pm me. It won't make me a millionaire but if you keep at it you can get a quite a few vouchers for lots of places.