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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To wonder where all the cheeky parents wanting free holiday childcare are?!

71 replies

rollonthesummer · 26/07/2017 09:49

Come on, it's day 3 of the holidays and I have time to sit and read mumsnet and there are NO current 'real time' stories of cheeky fuckers wanting to drop children off with some poor woman (usually with a newborn and three others of her own) at 7am until 7pm. Has everyone actually now sorted their own appropriate paid childcare?!

Do I need to get off my backside and do housework instead?!

OP posts:

Groovee · 26/07/2017 15:21

I'm at the neighbour asking for a week's childcare while she goes away seeing as the poster's child is going in to hospital!

vikingprincess81 · 26/07/2017 15:26

Flump ahhh the mummy guilt, it's a right fucker eh?
If it helps, at all, I'm at work right now and will be working most of the holidays (dh works term time only) and was greeted last night with a grumpy tween partially hidden by an ipad and a wee boy engrossed in bloody Minecraft YouTube videos who barely acknowledged my existence.
Don't beat yourself up too much, they do appreciate you really really really deep down
Have some more some and some xx

ThumbWitchesAbroad · 26/07/2017 15:40

Lovewatching - I suppose it didn't occur to your neighbour that you would, y'know, actually go and spend time with your child in hospital? Did she honestly think you'd be at home having a child-free time? That level of lack of care and stupidity is astounding!

Freshprincess · 26/07/2017 15:44

I had the opposite yesterday a SAHM friend offered to have mine round 'whilst I was at work'. I could drop the off at hers for 10 and pick them up after lunch. I have a normal 9-5 office job so how I'm supposed to be ferrying them around At that time I don't know. Plus they're 12/13 so don't need much minding.

She has never offered to have them once before so I'm a bit puzzled At the randomness of the offer.

MamaHanji · 26/07/2017 15:48

Flump

I'm a sahm (well I've gone back to work 1 day a week now) to an 8 month old and a 3 year old. Yesterday we made biscuits and then decorated them while friends came to play and we walked my parent's dog and had lovely, nutritious dinners.

Today everyone has had beans on toast and the telly has been on 90% of the day and the 3 year old is having super noodles for dinner and the 8 month old is have a pouch and microwaved broccoli, whilst I knit stare at my phone and avoid eye contact.

Although I do think I'm a bit shit and looking after humans at times as I'm just a big kid myself 🙁

GreeboIsACutePussPuss · 26/07/2017 16:10

Oh they are mostly bugging me, I'm a teaching assistant so not working over the holidays. Day three and I've had 6 requests already, the highlights are:

'Hey Greebo, you guys free for a play date tomorrow'
'yeah, sounds good'
'excellent I start at 8 so is dropping her round to you at 7.30am ok?'
'Ha no.'

The mum who won't talk to me at school things and whose child really doesn't get on with DD who sent me a list of 8 different dates she needs help because 'I don't want to pay for childcare when you're home doing nothing anyway, I'm sure the girls will learn to tolerate each other.'

NKFell · 26/07/2017 16:30

I got asked if I could have my friend's 7 month baby and 3yr old Fri- Mon so she could go away with her husband. She needed some peace.

I'm a single Mum to a 4 month baby, 2yr old, 4yr old and 8yr old so have a guess what the answer was!

Bloody peace...yeah I'd like some sodding peace. Cheeky bastard.

Willow2017 · 26/07/2017 16:31

I shouldnt read these threads either!
I cant get over the cheek of some people.

Thankfully I have never had this problem even once with people expecting free childcare from me (nor me expecting it from anyone else for that matter)

I despair of the human race sometimes. Get yourself bloody organised the holidays are not a surprise each year!

ZippyCameBack · 26/07/2017 16:32

I'd quite like to be asked, but I never am. I do have 4 of my own, but they are not at all feral and have never eaten a visiting child. I work from home but my husband is retired and happy to do all the necessary childcare work. I'm not scary and my house is clean and tidy but not offputtingly so.
I think it might be that I made a huge fuss over my pisstaking SIL years ago (after dumping her kids on our terminally ill MIL, she tried the same with me after MIL died. Never even asked my and when I stopped coming home between split shifts, she dumped them at my work!). Perhaps people are scared to ask me now, I dunno. We do have plenty of kids coming over to play though (and they are always keen to come back), so I'm fairly sure I don't smell!

BabychamSocialist · 26/07/2017 16:32

We're looking after DS1's friend for a week, but it's not the same as his mum is going in hospital for an op and he's 16 anyway so doesn't take a lot of looking after. Plus we actually like him.

ThumbWitchesAbroad · 27/07/2017 04:20

Wow Greebo - that is seriously plumbing the depths! - what a fucking cheek!! I do hope you sent a suitable reply back along the lines of your DD not being able to tolerate entitled cheeky people's DDs, EVAH.

user1497863568 · 27/07/2017 05:00

I've noticed less of it too ... and less of the twattish 'born to rule' types who think we exist to serve them (and provide free childcare) because they have more important things to do 👍The demographic changes in my area mean the mums or dads seem to look after their own kids in the holidays.

Original poster

rollonthesummer · 27/07/2017 08:04

Never even asked my and when I stopped coming home between split shifts, she dumped them at my work!)

Omg-more details needed!! Had she not asked you? What did you do?!

OP posts:

gruuumbleweec · 27/07/2017 08:10

During school holidays I looked after my friends 3 sons, while she did an early morning cleaning job. My 3 year old DD worshipped the 'big boys' . The arrangement was that the Dad picked them up when he came off night shift at 9 am . My Dd used to cry when they left so he would take her back with him. I kept going next door to bring her back but could not pry her away and although my friend kept saying 'it's fine' I was never really sure if she got the short straw.

ZippyCameBack · 27/07/2017 08:22

Never even asked my and when I stopped coming home between split shifts, she dumped them at my work!)

Omg-more details needed!! Had she not asked you? What did you do?!
Nope, she never once asked me to look after him. I worked in a hotel kitchen so it just wasn't safe for me to have a 5 year old boy with me at work. I could never catch her to talk to her about it, so in the end I sent MrZippy round to Have A Word.
I almost wish I hadn't because for a while she took him to work with her and after that she just left him at home on his own. A couple of times one of the neighbours pulled him out of the sea after he'd decided to make a raft and go sailing off (thankfully he wasn't good at raft-building!).

ZippyCameBack · 27/07/2017 08:24

Argh, not kids plural (in my first post), only one kid was dumped at my work, the older ones were at secondary.

waitforitfdear · 27/07/2017 08:40

zippy

Omg that's seriously awful and you add this to another thread?

Seriously where have you been that's a juicy thread all of its own.

ElsieDee · 27/07/2017 10:32

It's funny how quickly it snowballs... I offered a few days as a favour last summer holidays to a friend, sometimes I find it easier for my dd (only child) to have a friend over and our dd's are similar ages. Also, my friends dm provides most of her childcare and I feel sorry for her as she is not in the best of health.
Worked well, until come the Easter holidays my friend text me a week before with a list of the dates she needed me to cover! Didn't even ask first! Wouldn't be so bad except she has been using her annual leave days for things like day trips to London with friends or spa days and still left dd with her mother...

SleepFreeZone · 27/07/2017 10:35

Oh yes I've had a request to look after a child for the whole day at 10.45pm. I didn't pick it up until 24 hours later as I rarely use this particular messenger app. My friend received the same request and said no as she (and I) had plans.

Thing is I have two under 4 that are difficult enough all on their own. I wouldn't want to look after another preschooler for a whole day so regardless of plans that answer is always no.

IckleWicklePumperNickle · 27/07/2017 10:35

All I can say at some of these is WOW!!!

With our eldest my MIL very kindly has done all school holidays apart from when I was on maternity. She offers each time, I would never ever tell anyone you will take my kids.

This year she's not too well, but she still wanted to spend time with him. So me and DH divided our leave, he had 2 weeks with the eldest. I have 2.5 weeks and my MIL has him for 2 weeks.
DS wanted to go to holiday club on some days to spend time there, so one of the weeks I have him he's going 3 days. And he already has been 1 time when with DH and 2 days when with his granny.

The youngest goes to nursery as usual as he has only been in for 2 months and is still settling in.

WashBasketsAreUs · 27/07/2017 11:24

My daughter is a teacher so I have her little boy most days term time, depending on my work, nursery and when his dad works. School holidays now so although I don't HAVE to have him I have him a few days because I want to. However if the girls at work are stuck I offer to help them if I can. It's only happened a few times due to last minute emergencies but it's always appreciated. Funnily enough most people have organised their child care, what's the matter with these people?!!!!

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