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AIBU?

I probably am but FFS - stop using my coffee mug for tea!

91 replies

NoCryingInEngineering · 25/07/2017 08:45

I'm not a mug minimalist, we have fair size collection of mugs acquired over the years, but in among that collection there are a few favourite or specific mugs. And I have a favourite morning coffee mug, it says coffee all over it in different types and sizes of writing, its the perfect size for coffee on wfh mornings and it tends to live at the front of the cupboard because it's a regularly used mug.

But I can't have it this morning because my DFiL has nabbed it - and put tea in it!

Just how unreasonable would I be to pour the tea over him while sobbing 'That's MY mug' like a toddler

Disclaimers (1) I am not actually going to do this. (2) I am nearly 37wks, so the average toddler may be more emotionally stable atm. (3) in every other way he is a lovely man & he and DMiL have done some fantastic toddler wrangling this weekend while DH was away which has been life saving

but its still my mug

OP posts:
vikingprincess81 · 25/07/2017 08:49

Just pour the tea out over his head while screaming 'DON'T USE MY FUCKING MUG!!!!' That's the reasonable thing to do Grin

SpuriouserAndSpuriouser · 25/07/2017 08:49

What kind of a psycho would put tea in a mug that says "coffee" on it? For that alone he IBVVVU.

FruBayerischOla · 25/07/2017 08:50

I expect he just took the first mug he could see, despite the fact it has 'coffee' written all over it. And he probably doesn't realise it's your special mug anyway!

vikingprincess81 · 25/07/2017 08:52

I'm a tea only drinker I'm sorry coffee just tastes awful to me so I understand the angst in fact whack him with a shovel and bury under the patio - it's the only way he'll learn Wink

StripyHorse · 25/07/2017 08:55

YANBU

Is he my FIL? I have a mug that DH got me so it was there when I came from hospital after having DD1. It says "Super mum" on it. FIL has picked this mug from a collection of clean mugs (mostly plain white) to make his coffee in. Why??!!

He too is lovely and helpful but does lots of random stuff like this.

PlausibleSuit · 25/07/2017 08:55

At my last office job, I would hide my mug. (This is not a euphemism.) I kept it in a secret place. (Also not a euphemism.)

It wasn't even a very good mug but it was mine.

BertrandRussell · 25/07/2017 09:05

My mil has a particular mug I love. We visit every few months and she hands it to me full of tea within minutes of our arriving. And she tries to hide it between visits. Everyone else in the family competes to send me pictures of them drinking things ( it even tea-beer and red wine and coke) out of my mug. This has been going on for years Grin

CrowOnTheBroom · 25/07/2017 09:11

NoCrying, I've found my people! (Or person) I'm a bit funny about mugs. Certain mugs are my DP's and I would never, ever use them. He doesn't care either way, obviously. I also have mugs which I've decided are either for tea or coffee, and if DP makes me a hot drink in a "wrong" cup I usually need to change it. I'm not this weird about anything else in my life, honest!!

LittleCandle · 25/07/2017 09:12

Nobody touches my mug! XH tried that once, after my mother gave me a gorgeous new mug for Christmas. He was up before me (very rare!) and had made tea in it. I just stood and looked at him silently. One of the DC took it upon themselves to point out he was using my mug and he tipped his tea out and washed the mug very carefully (he had a habit of 'tapping' things on the tap and breaking them) before putting coffee into the mug for me. He never did it again. If he had, our marriage would have been over long before it actually ended.

OP, clearly there is only one solution for this - LTB! Grin

CrowOnTheBroom · 25/07/2017 09:12

So YANBU AT ALL! Grin

BreakfastAtSquiffanys · 25/07/2017 09:17

You need to get a waterproof Sharpie and write "NoCrying's" above the word coffee

Fairylea · 25/07/2017 09:21

This has made me laugh - in a nice way. I thought my mum and I were the only people to be so "mug specific". We have mugs for different types of drinks and I even have a mug I prefer for first thing in the morning because it makes a slightly larger cup of tea. Blush I get very annoyed if anyone uses my special mug.

MsVestibule · 25/07/2017 09:25

I have a special Emma Bridgewater mug that I use for my morning coffee - ridiculously expensive (well, by my standards), says 'Mummy' on the front and is covered in pink hearts. I still get pleasure from it, and was worth every penny of DH's money. Woe betide anybody who uses it.

I also have a far cheaper Yummy Scrummy Mummy cup that I only use for tea. On occasion, when I'm feeling generous, I'll allow my own mum to use it and tell her it's only because she is also a Yummy Scrummy Mummy, despite being really old. She appreciates the sentiment, I'm sure.

OP, I'm not sure what to suggest. Just think of it as a rather excessive payment for the toddler wrangling he's done; that may help you cope with the situation a little better.

WomblingThree · 25/07/2017 09:26

I've had a little cold shiver at the thought of someone using one of my three mugs. They might break it FFS! (all three are irreplaceable because they are 20 years old).

RupertsMum2 · 25/07/2017 09:29

Wait until you have teenagers. Your favourite mug will have to be located amongst the disgusting debris of the "teen cave" and need sterilised dish washed at least 10 times before you would even want to reclaim it never mind reuse it. Leave fil to his tea and select another mug. Says she who is currently drinking coffee from a mug that claims "Bread and water can so easily be tea and toast".

chibsortig · 25/07/2017 09:30

I have found the perfect solution to this after having my favourite mugs used and or broken.
I am the only one who washes my mug ;) I just leave it on the side near the coffee unwashed and obviously its far too much effort for anyone else to wash before using so they then have to grab one out of the cupboard.
I dont care if anyone thinks im a dirty midden for having a dirty cup because its my cup and i dont like sharing it.
I wash it regularly.

BlackAmericanoNoSugar · 25/07/2017 09:31

I have some mugs that I bought from Anthropologie that are exactly the right size for an individual cup coffee filter to sit on. I used to have six of them but now I only have four left because H is very heavy handed with crockery. Sometimes I come downstairs and I find that he has made himself tea in the last clean one and my whole day is off kilter because I had to make my coffee in the mug that my Mum brought back from visiting Prince Charle's garden. Angry

OhWhatFuckeryIsThisNow · 25/07/2017 09:31

My friend bought me a lovely China mug and it vanished, eeveryone denied knowledge (after hours of grilling) Then I caught ds wandering around with it. "Oh, you meant this one!" the only China mug out of a random selection of buckets with handles.

picklemepopcorn · 25/07/2017 09:35

You are my mother's people! I'm often stay with her because my dad is very poorly. Last visit she took me to task for using her mug. I washed it up, made her a drink and used a different mug. Which was also hers, apparently. This visit neither of her preferred mugs was visible and when we brought her a drink in a random mug, she tore a strip off us.

I have preferred mugs. I don't mind when they aren't available though!

picklemepopcorn · 25/07/2017 09:36

I'd love to fill my cupboards with 'nice mugs' that I like, but I'd weep at the number DH would break.

NoCryingInEngineering · 25/07/2017 09:36

I'm glad I'm not being completely irrational (or that there are enough Mug People out there for me to feel normal). I have had coffee in a different mug and feel a little better, though I can't wait to properly enjoy coffee again once this baby is here. I may hide that mug before their next visit, or just keep it in constant use to counteract sleep deprivation

My DM still keeps a couple of special mugs at home for me and DSis, and DS was even allowed the Peter Rabbit mug for his milk last time we were there (I haven't told DSis this yet). But then my DPs have specific mid-morning and mid-afternoon mugs and I don't think the PiLs do preferred mugs in the same way.

The worst thing about my current job is that as we hot desk I don't have a desk drawer to keep a mug in :(

OP posts:
Barbie222 · 25/07/2017 09:37

The other way around, it would have been a MASSIVE issue. But coffee overpowers other tastes so for me I wouldn't mind.
I'm sure you can buy a mug with a message that makes your feeling known though!

ludog · 25/07/2017 09:42

I have a collection of fairly expensive pottery mugs that I have built up over the years (my friend and I get each other a new edition one each birthday). Despite them being expensive, they are my everyday mugs and live at the front of the cupboard. However, anytime dh makes me tea he will make it in any random mug, usually one tucked away at the back. He doesn't drink tea so clearly doesn't understand but I still harbour fantasies of leavingTB.

viques · 25/07/2017 09:47

I used to have a special, very pretty mug at work, just the right size for a fruit tea (which I drank because they don't taste rank when they go cold when you don't have time to drink them hot ) it was also special because a friend had given it to me. The crazy woman who was for some reason in charge of the school coveted my mug, and used to pinch it regularly, then hide it in her private office loo. Luckily I had an ally (the cleaner) who used to rescue it and return it to me. Actually now I remember it, she (crazy bitch) once also stole my packet of fruit tea and put it in the OFSTED inspectors room, I liberated that on my own though. Yah! power to the people.

I feel for you fellow mug people exposed to wanton mug abuse.

user1471443504 · 25/07/2017 09:51

I have my mugs and husband has his (probably about 6 each 😁) We only use our own and would never use each others. I also have mugs specifically for guests. My mug cupboard is stuffed full but I can't resist buying mugs !

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