AIBU- to give myself a middle name

[SheWhoLivesHere]

I am getting married in a few weeks and will be changing my surname. I do not have a middle name and I'm considering giving myself one whilst I'm at it.

Is this a bonkers idea? I don't have a name in mind- I'd still have to pick one, but is it really weird?

And as an aside, if you could pick your own middle name would you, and what would it be?

It's pointless, and it won't feel like your name. It'll always be that name you gave yourself.

Go for it. If you've had a name in mind.

I chose my middle name when I was adopted. Feels like my name.

If you want one, why not? Are there any females ib your life you'd like to honour? Mum, Gran, etc etc?

Have at it. I believe it's quite common in the US if you're changing your name to use your maiden name as your middle name from then on (and that's where you get surname baby names from, too, e.g. Mackenzie).

Personally I would pick something flowery and daft, or greek and daft, to offset my rather ordinary first name (hint in my username :D). My actual middle name is yawnworthy as well.

BRB, checking the spelling of Lucretia.

That's a nice idea, OP, and why not, if it makes you happy?

I like my middle name so there's no need for me to pick one, it's unisex & I've always been happy with it.

Go for it.

Good idea. And a great opportunity to do it.

Go for it!

May as well be hung for a sheep as for a lamb, I say.

I have my late mum's name for my middle name. As a child, I always felt sorry for friends who had just one forename, like they were... deprived somehow.

I really like Saiorse.

My DP and DBil both did this. Their dad didn't want them to have middle names. Years later and their parents have split and their mum has paid for them to change their names to get back at their dad. Just a shame they both chose ridiculous names!

Do you want one? Why?

I don't have one and used to write one on my school books 😆 but really don't care now.

If you are changing to married name and want to keep maiden name as middle, that I can understand, but to just come up with one?!

Nice idea OP. I only have a first name (as my parents really struggled to find even one name they both liked!) and have long wanted a middle name.

As a child, I told people my middle name was Bianca after the mouse heroine of the Rescuers, and as a teen I used Caroline (after an aunt who died in infancy).

I always planned to give a daughter my mums (fairly unusual Italian) name as her middle name, as my mum died when i was 21. However as i have boys and not girls it never happened. Now thinking maybe i should just adopt my mums name as my own middle name?

Yes, do it. However I presume that this means you'd have to go th deed poll route-??

When you get married, you can just start using the spouse's name - there's no official 'name change' thing you do - eg for passport change you would just send along your marriage certificate. I presume this wouldn't cover a full on forename change so if you eg wanted your passport or other ID documents to show the new mn you would need to do deed poll.

We both chose a new surname when we married so we had to both do deed poll.

Sounds like a great idea! I'm the only one of my siblings to have only one middle name and it's a really popular, dull middle name for women of my age (with no family connection or relevance, although it does go well with my first name). My three siblings have two middle names each which are all flamboyant and unusual.

Takes a leaf out of MsSusanLucretiaStoHelit 's book and heads off to Google spellings of Delilah.

Go for it, OP!

This may out me but my mum was 60 recently and had always wanted a middle name. She wanted the same middle name as her late mum.

We got all the papers drawn up and presented them to her on her birthday. It was awesome. She tells the story to whoever will listen!

Oh, and so my answer is do it!

I did this. Because I didnt want the same initials as my MIL. I chose my grandmothers name. It doesnt really flow but I like it. And I like the fact there is something of my family as I changed my surname to DHs. I didnt want to but estranged from my father so there was no real need to keep my maiden name.

You could of course use your maiden name as a middle name.

I had to do this by deed poll but it was cheap. (although I think you can do it for free)

IHeartKingThistle What a lovely story!

Tried to think of what I'd change it to but nothing seems to flow properly. I had a very rounded name with my maiden name and everyone would comment on it. My married surname just doesn't have that same ring to it but I'm sure it's because it's not the "me" I've known my whole life. Not a maiden name but I've always loved the surname Sexton.

By the way, if you're in the UK, you don't need a deed poll to take on your husband's surname so the middle name thing would be a separate process but you'd have to mention the surname change at the same time, iyswim. You simply use your marriage certificate as proof you can use your new surname if you don't take on a new maiden name.

If you want to take on your maiden name as a middle name or give yourself a middle name then you can do this via a deed poll. As a word of caution, I'd go for the route of getting a solicitor to do it or filling out the forms yourself and registering it with the court and London Gazette (there's a charge for this, I think it was less than £40 but you need someone who's known you 10 years, is a home owner and British Citizen to certify they know you in front of a solicitor (another £5 - £10 charge) or judge. If you write your own deed poll, banks and official agencies don't always accept it. There's info on the gov.uk website.

I have one I've had from birth, so I wouldn't but go for it!
My son has two middle names!

If you are getting married, I think all you have to do is sign your married name as SheWhoLivesHere Middlename Surname.
There are sites saying that you need to do it by deed poll, but iirc the marriage certificate has the same status as a statutory declaration. By that theory, if you were Jane Smith marrying John Evans, you could sign your name as
Jane Smith
Jane Taylor
Jane Smith Taylor
Esmerelda Volemort ...

Maybe someone with the legal expertise could confirm or correct me.

I forgot the Jane Delilah Lucretia Evans (got Evans and Tylor mixed up in the examples)

MikeUniformMike

You don't sign the marriage certificate, you sign the register therefore this would not be correct. The marriage certificate is what you keep as proof of marriage and can be used along with other forms of ID.

It used to be that you could be "known as" anything but this changed.

If you write your own deed poll, banks and official agencies don't always accept it. There's info on the gov.uk website.

I've done a home made and so did a friend. His bank were a bit iffy about it, but I sent mine off to get a new passport (old one was about to go out of date) and they accepted it.

I then just used a copy of the cert and my passports

Oooh I didn't know you could just start using your new surname with a marriage certificate, I thought there was another step in legally changing it.

If you do it by deed poll, wait until after the wedding, otherwise the notice of your marriage (or banns) won't count and you'll have to have that done again, and there might not be time!