Am I being unreasonably literal?

[Goldfishshoals]

We're packing the car to go on a trip. Dh calls downstairs from the bedroom 'are there any toys up here that need to go in the car?' I say 'no'.

He comes down with our bags and then starts taking things out to the car. 'and there are no toys to go in?' he asks. 'these need to go in' I say, pointing at the bag of toys on the sofa.

He then huffs because 'i told him there were no toys to go in', but I point out that he actually asked if there were toys upstairs, and that's what I said 'no' to, he calls me 'insanely pedantic', and states that 'anyone else' would have answered his question by saying there were toys downstairs. We then grumble at each other a bit, get over it, and go on a nice trip.

It isn't a big deal, but I'm genuinely curious because we frequently seen to have conversations like this. From my perspective he wants me to answer a different question from the one he asked, from his perspective I'm being too literal.

So which one of us is unreasonable?

He is-you're not a mindreader!

I'm with you, but then I am autistic! So that's no help really.

I would have answered 'no toys up there but there is a bag on the sofa.' My DH takes everything very literally too, so I have to spell it out.

I'd have answered 'Not from up here, no. Just what's on the sofa'.

what early said

I'd interpret the same way as you, but also if I was him I mightn't expect the answer of 'no, they are downstairs already'
So neither of you are really unreasonable.
And I'm unhelpful...

I think my answer to him would have been "not here, but there's a bag on the sofa".

So I'd have answered it both the way you saw it, and the way he saw it.

No I would have told him to be more fucking specific.

I agree, reading your op I thought I'd have said "nothing upstairs they're ready on the sofa" or similar.

However if I'd asked the question he did I'd not have assumed there were no toys at all to go based on your response.

So, yabothbu. Helpful

Hope you have a good holiday!

YANBU. He specified a location in the question but wanted a non location specific answer? What on earth was he thinking?!

I probably would have answered that there were some on the sofa.

Partly I think it depends on his intonation and how much he stressed 'up here' when asking

I'd have answered the same as you OP

Situation: bag of toys on the downstairs sofa.
Question: Are there any toys upstairs [to pack in the car]

Sensible answer: none upstairs, I've packed them ready, on the sofa to go in the car.

I'd have replied: "No, I've already sorted them. They're down here on the sofa".

I'm also autistic and would have given the same response as you OP.

Neither being wholly unreasonable. To say "just the toys down here" wouldn't have killed you but your answer was fair enough too.

I'd have said "none upstairs but there's a bag down here" and DH would have said "I didn't ask about down there, I asked about up here".

I don't think you are being too literal but he clearly needs more information than he's getting. Sounds like my family. Every conversation is a battle of semantics.

I would have assumed he was asking about upstairs as he was upstairs and the downstairs ones were irrelevant. It would not have occurred to me to mention the downstairs ones like other people suggest.

I would have said "no, but there's a bag down here".

Another autistic one here who thinks you were right

I would have said "no but theres some down here".

You sound like you were trying to trip him up. Bet you thought about the ones downstairs when he asked you the question. Why wouldn't you mention them?

Autistic here who also thinks you're right. But I've learned that the question is never the real question with NTs so I'd have clarified that there were toys downstairs.