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AIBU?

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Original poster

Scout leader made a very dodgy remark... should I report him?

105 replies

MiniPharm · 18/07/2017 23:13

My DD went on a 2-night scout camp at the weekend. Part of the weekend was swimming at our local leisure centre.

She told me that, on the way to swimming, the Scout leader was telling them all how to behave (fine). Then he said to the only Black kid scout, to 'make sure he had a long shower after swimming because otherwise he might end up looking like a ghost'.

I asked my DD if he meant it as a joke but she's sure he didn't. The kid just looked confused, apparently Hmm

Was he out of order? Racist? I think he was but I need to know if IABU and should I say anything...?

OP posts:
DameDiazepamTheDramaQueen · 18/07/2017 23:43

I think it's pretty ignorant to assume all scout leaders are racist Horrid especially as some posters are saying a residue is left from the chlorine.

AtSea1979 · 18/07/2017 23:44

Horrid surely you can see the irony of your post?
Ignorance? By judging a group of people? Like black people? Or gay people? Or scout leaders?
You are showing ignorance by assuming all scout leaders are like this one vague example.

user1476869312 · 18/07/2017 23:48

Did your DD mention it as something that bothered her, or say that the other child was upset? Orwas it just in passing? Kids might pick up on the fact that an adult is being unkind to another kid without actually understanding why or what was said, so if it bothered her it might need checking out. But if she just mentioned it along with a lot of other things, it's perhaps a bit too vague and garbled to do anything about.

HorridHenryrule · 18/07/2017 23:48

I'm over protective by nature. To not think its ignorant to target one child and tell only him to shower long says a lot about you. The ops child obviously felt uncomfortable for her to tell her mother. Its not right to single out one child.

Highlyinternational · 18/07/2017 23:49

Black skin goes ashy after swimming. It wasn't a racist remark, it was stating a fact.

BurberryBlue · 18/07/2017 23:52

It sounds very derogatory and I would report.Really should be picked up early,totally disgraceful.

puzzledbyadream · 18/07/2017 23:56

HorridHenryRule, incidents like this are extremely rare in Scouting, it's quite a modern organisation these days. Please don't be put off!

Kursk · 18/07/2017 23:56

He was stating a fact, which has been miss interpreted by others who may have jumped to conclusions.

maggiecate · 18/07/2017 23:58

Google ashy skin - basically when skin gets dehydrated it can take on a white or gray colour that shows up more on darker pigmented skin (like if your elbows get dry and look a but dusty and weird)

So whilst it could happen to any of the kids if the chlorine dries their skin it would be more visible on the black child. Would probably be more helpful to give the child some body lotion for after their shower to moisturise with than tell them to take a long shower as that would dry the skin even more, but most likely they've seen it happen to another kid and there's been a comment about them looking like a ghost or similar.

PlymouthMaid1 · 18/07/2017 23:58

If that is true about looking ashy then perhaps it was just a harmless comment to the black child.

saltandvinegarcrisps1 · 19/07/2017 00:01

This reply has been deleted

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TwentyYears · 19/07/2017 00:04

minipharm sorry but as soon as I read your post I thought 'whoa, racist'. In my opinion that's a totally inappropriate comment. I used to be a swimmer and there us nothing kosher about that remark. And why make a comment about colour of skin to the only kid with skin of a significantly different colour. Nope, either so ignorant they should not be a scout leader, or racist.

Justaboy · 19/07/2017 00:05

Well if this really was a bad racist joke then he does deserve reporting but make certain before you do that as there are very few who will take on that role nowadays because of all the issues that can arise whilst working with children so a mate of mine says who does just that.

Seems to be getting more difficult complying all the time now.

Whodoesthis17 · 19/07/2017 00:16

You have no idea what he meant, and it could have even been a comment the parents asked the leader to pass on.
We all hear something and put are own spin on things, has this man ever given you casue to worry before?

Elfieselfie · 19/07/2017 00:21

Don't get this at all.

Arealhumanbeing · 19/07/2017 01:20

Jesus.

Whatever he meant, it looks like he made reference to a black child's skin colour in front of others and said something stupid/insensitive/ignorant/racist.

Someone needs to raise it with him so he can explain what he DID mean, then say sorry.

Also he needs to know why what he said was wrong. Skin going ashy etc isn't a good enough explanation.

toffeeboffin · 19/07/2017 01:31

Bit of a long shot that one really.

YouTheCat · 19/07/2017 07:16

I used to go out with a scout master. He's the most racist twat I've ever met. (not that that means they all are of course) After he'd gleefully told me how he used to like to piss black scouts off because he didn't want 'their sort' in his troop, I dumped and blocked.

Sounds like the kind of thing he would have said.

rollonthesummer · 19/07/2017 07:20

I was thinking about putting my boy in scouts when he got older but FTS I wouldn't want my kid exposed to ignorance.

Yes, you should keep your son away from scouting because one person on a web forum somewhere possibly in the same country as you might have said something racist. Perhaps you should stop them from going to school too, just in case.

EsmereldaMargaretNoteSpelling · 19/07/2017 07:30

You need to contact the GSL - Group Scout Leader and ask to chat to them in confidence. The GSL is not the individual Scout troop leader but the overall figure head for your entire group including beavers, cubs and scouts, it's a slightly confusing name! Good ones will usually be around before and after meetings and they should also have an email address that parents can use. They are the first port of call for anything of this nature. I would raise it yes. The troop leader may well have meant absolutely nothing by it but the fact remains that it made you and your child uncomfortable and confused and therefore it needs to be explained.

user1495025590 · 19/07/2017 07:36

I would leave it because you didn't actually hear the remark and,given that it doesn't really make sense, I think there might be some context you are missing. Maybe ask your DC how the guy normally is with this child

Theimpossiblegirl · 19/07/2017 07:36

Whodoesthis- I was going to suggest the same, could have easily been a parental request. It makes more sense than as a random comment.

user1495025590 · 19/07/2017 07:38

Many scout troops are not part of a group. I think you really need to discover the context first before you start making complaints

AwaywiththePixies27 · 19/07/2017 07:39

I'd verify what was said with other children first before I report anyone anywhere.

My DSis once did a course as part of her training on how kids can misinterpret what was said and it all gets blown out of proportion.

There's a difference between teaching your child you will believe them and clearly not working to verify such outlandish remarks. Especially when the 'joke' doesn't even make sense.

AwaywiththePixies27 · 19/07/2017 07:40

I was thinking about putting my boy in scouts when he got older but FTS I wouldn't want my kid exposed to ignorance.

God. That's not a batshit response to an unverified comment on the interwebs at all Hmm

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