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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Need a hand hold.

78 replies

AragornsManlyStubble · 14/07/2017 19:22

Please?

Someone?

I'm not coping and I'm really struggling.

There's no one in my life whose listening to me. I'm postnatally depressed, just moved house and will spend the weekend alone in a house with 4 children, with a kitchen I can't even get into because of mess and boxes. I'm so tired, so tired of having no control over my life. So tired of everyone sweeping me away.

OP posts:
Justhadmyhaircut · 14/07/2017 20:19

It's best for your dc that you get the help you need to be able to be their dm. .
4 is a handful, my 4 are 11,10,8+2. I remember the baby and the lack of sleep only too well. It doesn't last but the love you all have will. .
If you want some help someone will give you it op. . Flowers

whateveryousay · 14/07/2017 20:19

Please don't leave. Keep talking on here. Where in the country are you?

kaytee87 · 14/07/2017 20:20

If you feel able to then let us know where you are, someone might be able to help or point you in the right direction for help

DudeHatesHisCarryOut · 14/07/2017 20:21

Where are you? One of us may be nearby to lend a hand.

Original poster
AragornsManlyStubble · 14/07/2017 20:21

Honestly, I've been so awful and grumpy with everyone including the dc. I wake up everyday hoping that it'll end. I have such bad thoughts, it all hurts so much. I really think I need to leave and go to the hospital. I went once before after a suicide attempt and was put on a psychiatric ward. I feel this would help. I so want to run away.

OP posts:
whateveryousay · 14/07/2017 20:22

Is there another adult with you now?

Bestbees · 14/07/2017 20:23

A hand hold and a voice in the void from me. Are you able to contact homestart/ childrens centre for support? Maybe tell us about your kids?

Bestbees · 14/07/2017 20:24

I think calling the hospital would be a good idea. A positive step at least for advice. You sound very self aware. Flowers

kaytee87 · 14/07/2017 20:24

Do you have the phone number of the hospital? Could you call someone there for a chat?
I think you need to phone your dh and ask him to come home. You thinking he's disgusted with you is very likely just a symptom of your depression x

Sushi123 · 14/07/2017 20:24

Please call a friend or family member, no matter how far away they are. Tell them you need help and you need it now. Please make a call. What area are you in?

Frazzled2207 · 14/07/2017 20:25

Hello I'm holding your hand too. Do you have a friend that can just come over and chat and help with practical matters? I only have 2 kids and struggle to cope at times.

Original poster
AragornsManlyStubble · 14/07/2017 20:25

I'm locked in the bedroom with the baby, he's quite unsettled. The others are awake in their rooms. I was alone, my mother and partner have arrived and are downstairs doing things.

OP posts:
kaytee87 · 14/07/2017 20:25

In the meantime try some skin to skin with the baby for lots of warm snuggly happy hormones Flowers

GreenRut · 14/07/2017 20:25

When did you start the citalopram op?

JamPasty · 14/07/2017 20:25

Getting medical help is a good thing. Your kids need you, and they need you to be healthy. Can you get your husband to come home, to look after the kids? There is light at the end of this tunnel, i promise

Frazzled2207 · 14/07/2017 20:26

Ok that's good. Try and settle your baby first, then can you be honest with them?

Sushi123 · 14/07/2017 20:26

Oh good, so glad they are there xxx

Odoreida · 14/07/2017 20:26

It may well be that the citalopram hasn't started working yet but it will, it really will, and it will help. It does take a bit of time though.

JamPasty · 14/07/2017 20:26

Hey, that's good they have arrived to help. Snuggle and comfort the baby - he needs you

Original poster
AragornsManlyStubble · 14/07/2017 20:26

I can't talk to them. I don't trust them. They've been by themselves all day, no doubt talking about how shit I'am. They made all the moving plans around me and just told me what was happening.

OP posts:
Original poster
AragornsManlyStubble · 14/07/2017 20:27

They haven't acknowledged me.

OP posts:
Odoreida · 14/07/2017 20:28

I so remember all the feelings you are talking about and I didn't even have other children to look after. It's great that you started this thread, please use it, everyone is rooting for you.

kaytee87 · 14/07/2017 20:28

Op that's the depression talking, I know you can't see it yet but you will.

JamPasty · 14/07/2017 20:30

Can you just tell them what you are doing, eg "here is the baby, I am going to the hospital now as I feel unwell". The most important thing is to make sure you get well

JustDontGetItAtAll · 14/07/2017 20:30

I'm the same here besides the house but. Literally not a single soul to speak to. No friends, no family. DDs dad doesn't see her. Nothing. Just wake up each morning wishing I hadn't...