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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think it's not a big deal to sit in front of the TV with my tea most nights?!

125 replies

Teddy7878 · 14/07/2017 16:52

Got into a debate with some colleagues at work today who ALL said it was all really 'chavvy' to eat your tea on your knee in front of the TV.
First of all - I hate the word 'chavvy'!
And second of all - I do this most nights and really don't see what the big deal is. My partner and I still find plenty of time to catch up with each other during the evenings such as when we're cooking or when we're in bed.
One of my particularly bitchy colleagues had the front to also say that couples who don't sit at the table together to eat are most likely the ones who are bored of each other and will eventually end up splitting up.
AIBU to think she's being ridiculous?

OP posts:
farfarawayfromhome · 14/07/2017 17:16

I'm 41, have a large house with space for a dining table, choose to eat dinner on a cushioned tea tray every night! We don't have a tv so usually have music on and chat. Love it!

theSnuffster · 14/07/2017 17:19

Plenty of people don't or can't have a table so what are they meant to do?!

babsjonhson · 14/07/2017 17:19

Hahah what a weirdo.

I did up until I gave birth! I don't agree it's good for children but nor is a glass of wine!

If my dd wasn't here id be having my dinner with a large glass in front of the hand maids tale! Enjoy!

morningtoncrescent62 · 14/07/2017 17:21

I'm with you on the word 'chivvy', OP - really snobby and sneery.

And I'd take bets that some of your colleagues do eat their tea in front of the telly but didn't like to say so in that judgey context - so well done you for sticking up for yourself.

I don't eat my tea on my knee because I'm clumsy and it would go everywhere. But I quite often eat it from a little table in front of the telly. Your colleague is being ridiculous with the comment about relationships. So long as you make time at some point to talk to each other, of course it doesn't have to be over a sit-down-at-table meal.

SapphireStrange · 14/07/2017 17:23

They're snobs.

If I had kids I think I'd grudgingly have dinner at the table, at least most of the time. I wasn't taught real table manners or how to behave and talk at the table etc as a child, and I wouldn't want children of mine to be the same.

But it's just me and DP and we sit and trough in front of all our favourite telly. It's one of the perks of being an adult. Grin

morningtoncrescent62 · 14/07/2017 17:24

Not sure I could eat in front of Handmaid's Tale, babsjohnson - I prefer lighter viewing with my tea! Grin

SpottedGingham · 14/07/2017 17:24

I can't eat from a plate on my lap because I will invariably slop some food on the settee. Plus we haven't got a tv to watch! Grin

VickieCherry · 14/07/2017 17:27

Eleven years together, never owned a dining table as we either didn't have a big enough house or the space that would have been a dining room was unwelcoming (yay renting). We do now have a big enough house, but haven't got around to buying one yet because my god, houses are expensive when you own them - it's not a priority. No kids.

We manage to have actual conversations most evenings. Sometimes we're so knackered we just grunt at each other. Pretty certain I'm not a chav.

Original poster
Teddy7878 · 14/07/2017 17:27

I'm impressed with those who don't have tellys. I definitely watch too much of it so I think I'd struggle to give it up completely.

I asked them what they do when they order takeaways and if they also eat those around the dining table with the tv off.
All 6 of them were like "yeah of course!" and looked at me as though I was mental.
I LOVE ordering a Chinese every few weeks and eating it in front of a movie on a Friday night!

OP posts:
MagdalenNoName · 14/07/2017 17:38

I find a lot of TV really irritating and I also find it hard to have good conversation with a lot of background noise. (I dislike restaurants that play loud music.)

In terms of eating without spilling stuff and also digesting sitting fairly upright seems better.

After eating I like being able to spread out a newspaper on the table and do the crossword.

I'd see eating in front of the TV as an occasional 'treat' thing. (Sometimes when Strictly Come Dancing is on.)

I agree that new houses can be very small - but I'd be very tempted to get rid of overlarge sofas - and maybe -have smaller comfortable chairs in order to have room for a table. (Maybe a folding or extendable one?)

SweetLuck · 14/07/2017 17:38

I do this. And I have a child eating here too Shock It's because my parents were working class and eating in front of the telly is part of our culture. My heritage is v.v. important to me Grin

That's what I would like to think I would say to your colleague.

dollydaydream114 · 14/07/2017 17:38

For years DP & I had a tiny house with no dining room. If we had guests we'd set up our folding table in the living room but when it was just us we usually ate on our laps. We don't actually watch that much telly generally so often we'd just watch one thing or two things on Sky Plus while we were eating and probably no other telly that evening. We don't have kids so no issues there.

Now we have a proper kitchen-diner with a space for a big table we don't really do that any more but there is absolutely nothing wrong with if that's what suits you and it's nobody's business but yours.

TheSeaTheSkyTheSeaTheSkyyyyyy · 14/07/2017 17:38

I eat while watching tv, but will transition to sit-down family meals when my kids get older as I think that's important. As a childless couple or a couple with a young baby, I don't see what difference it makes.

And I think I'll always watch a film when I have a takeaway. The kids will join us for it! It's part of the fun!

Xmasbaby11 · 14/07/2017 17:40

We eat all family meals at table. But when the kids are out or in bed, we often eat in front of the TV. Can't see the big deal tbh.

WinnieTheMe · 14/07/2017 17:43

I was brought up with "proper dinner time" and will do that when DD is old enough to sit up properly. Right now, I will wallow in my chavvy ways and watch TV while eating.

I also have been known to have ice cream for dinner and I once bought pre chopped veg too.

I regret nothing!

winglesspegasus · 14/07/2017 17:44

they just dont want to admit they are on their screens when they eat.
enjoy your sausages.

applesareredandgreen · 14/07/2017 17:45

Well we have 2 tables in my chavvy little house, one in the kitchen, against the wall due to lack of space, so we can't all sit round that, and a second in the living room which Is folded against a wall (again lack of space) and which we get out at Christmas but we need to remove some of the other furniture from the room to do so.

When DS was small, he and I would sit at the kitchen table so I could teach him 'table manners' and also protect the living room carpet. Nowadays we all sit on chairs in front of the TV, although DH is a shift worker so he often isn't around at 'normal' mealtimes anyway .

We do, however go out for a meal together once or twice a week when we do sit round a table and chat together.

whattheheckinheck · 14/07/2017 17:45

YANBU!

I love eating dinner in front of the telly. DH and I do it 3-4 nights a week depending on what shifts we are working and I look forward to it all day! We chat loads most of the time but some nights we are so tired it's just nice to spend quiet time together and watch our favourite shows before going to bed. The other nights I don't see him at all :( I used to insist on eating at the table but we'd both just eat and then go to bed or go and do our own thing. Our evenings are much better now!

Titsywoo · 14/07/2017 17:45

Ha ha - how stupid! DH and I eat on our sofas. It's just a habit. In fact our dining table is right in front of where we sit and eat but we didn't have a table for the first 10 years of our relationship and we're just used to it. We are probably the most secure couple I know. We don't sit on the same sofa so still chat as we eat and watch TV. I'd find it too formal to sit and eat with DH at a table - sounds silly as we go to restaurants lots. When we eat with the kids we sit at the table. To each his own!

MumBod · 14/07/2017 17:45

My mother used to dish up onto trays, which we would file through to the kitchen to pick up, before walking past the dining table to sit on the sofa and eat in front of the telly.

Never did me any harm.

TheSeaTheSkyTheSeaTheSkyyyyyy · 14/07/2017 17:47

The only thing better than watching a new episode of Game of Thrones with my OH is watching it while enjoying a tasty hot dinner! Yum!

KickAssAngel · 14/07/2017 17:48

We love eating and watching a movie together - its our Friday night treat. DD is 13. We also eat while sitting at a computer.

It's very middle class to worry about something being common. Shows a real lack of class.

FelixtheMouse · 14/07/2017 17:53

I'd love to eat at table every night but I can't because the dining room table is covered with someone's quilting stuff and sewing machine .

PlymouthMaid1 · 14/07/2017 17:54

I dont like eating on the sofa. I find it uncomfortable and awkward if need to cut food. I also dont like the living room smelling of food. We always use the table unless we have decided its nachos and film night. I do watch the news while we eat though.

SallyGinnamon · 14/07/2017 17:55

Up to you!
We have most meals at the breakfast bar in the kitchen. Other times it's 'teas on knees' in the sitting room in front of the TV. We still manage to talk and have been together 20 odd years with DC 17 and 14.

I don't think we're chavvy, but I suppose I wouldn't know would I?