To have lost all respect for several family members.

[Beelzebop]

I have just watched my cousin in law drive away with a car load of in laws pissed!!
We were all leaving a meal, spoke to cousin, he was slurring his words and obviously drunk. Someone fetched his car keys, which I questioned and everyone suddenly started ignoring me. They all got in the car and let him drive them! They all knew, my DP is now annoyed with me for trying to stop him and saying helpful drunken comments. No one backed me up at all and my kids witnessed the lot. DP, and the D is being generous tbh, has been obnoxious since we got home but has thankfully passed out now. I am gobsmacked. Was there anything else I could do? I was literally running around in the dark trying to get people to listen, and they just shut me down. I feel like I never want to see several of them again.

Oh and Daily Mail, fuck. Off.

Sorry Beel I wasn't having a pop at you. I was attempting to be supportive. I was reminding you that whatever crap you take from your family you absolutely were in the right. Of course you were. And of course it was a bloody hard thing to do. Here lost of people who know someone is living with dv and don't storm in to fix it.

Rest assured you did the right thing. And if your family give you crap, now or in the future, tell them that you don't feel up to plannning all their funerals. People who drive drunk or get into cars with drunk drivers or put their children in cars with drunk drivers are irresponsible idiots.

Noni, I appreciate your help and thanks xxx.

I'd really be weighing up how I felt about my partner having such a different view as me regarding this situation.
I'm with you Op, none of the people in question would ever drive my dc anywhere ever again. I'd be ascertaining where my Dp stood on what's happened also in the light of day. Does he just hush hush and play down drink drivers when he's drunk himself?

Apologies by the way if I keep swapping between dh and dp, I'm not used to having a husband!
To be fair to my dh he doesn't in any way condone drink driving. He is very ashamed of himself. He felt paralysed, didn't know what to do. No one has ever gone against his mother, or probably the driver. I know they have an interesting opinion on me as I will pipe up.
I have emphasised that I expect his full support and that we need to discuss the issues within his family and what contact we have.

Apologies by the way if I keep swapping between dh and dp, I'm not used to having a husband!
To be fair to my dh he doesn't in any way condone drink driving. He is very ashamed of himself. He felt paralysed, didn't know what to do. No one has ever gone against his mother, or probably the driver. I know they have an interesting opinion on me as I will pipe up.
I have emphasised that I expect his full support and that we need to discuss the issues within his family and what contact we have.

What was preventing your DH from looking after the children?

What was preventing you from calling the police?

Good for you standing up to them, I hope in the cold light of day they are ashamed ..

Gingernaut, please re read what I have put, I have already covered your questions.

Thanks for all your help and opinions. Even if I don't agree with you I appreciate it.

Seriously?

OP has said what she was trying to do in a crowd of drunken revellers. Her dh was also useless she asked him to tell concierge to phone police but he didnt. OP was trying to stop the idiot getting in the car with no help at all. She couldn't be in 3 places at once.

OP it's not your fault. The blame lies purely with the drunken idiot and the family and your dh.

Well done for trying.

Hope you clear things up with your dh and you never have to see those idiots again.

Thanks Willow.

Sounds like a bloody awful situation Op must have been a shock.

It was shocking actually, thanks. I have ptsd and am still not right at all tbh.