To ask for positive experiences of third degree tears

[Magicmonster]

And any tips for recovery? I had my second baby yesterday and suffered a third degree tear. I made the mistake of googling third degree tears at 5am this morning and am worried about what the future has in store (as well as really wishing I had taken the elective c section on offer!)

Does anyone have any positive stories about recovery from third degree tears to make me feel a bit more..well...positive?

KEEP EATING! If you stop eating (because you are scared of pooing) things will become a bit explosive with all the lactulose you are taking.

And pelvic floor exercises lots and lots and lots. Gusset grippers is really good (she's around here somewhere but also has her own website)

I'd say for the first couple of years I wasn't happy unless I knew where the nearest loo was. I still do a lot of pelvic floor exercises, but I'd say everything is now absolutely fine.

And Stop googling no good will come of it.

I had a 3rd degree internal tear as like above dd decided to be born with her arm up over her face. Thanks dd!

I was stitched up in the room with gas and air as I refused to go to theatre as I was scared and didn't want to leave my baby.

Jug of warm water when you wee (or wee in the shower) and I sat on a piles cushion for quite a while as well to relieve some of the pressure.

I wasn't given anything to soften my stools and the first poo was scary but fine and didn't hurt after I sat in the toilet for over half an hour! It was 3 days after the birth though.

I've not had any major issues, slight stress incontinance but I'm really crap at doing my pelvic floors so think that's to blame rather than the tear and I recently had dd2 who came out with no superhero antics, caused no issues and only had the tiniest of tiniest grazes this time.

Oh, just remembered: I was advised to press a pad to my stitches when pooing as it gave a feeling of security. That first poo was a bit scary but the pad thing helped, IIRC. Placebo effect hey

Lovelyday when did your friend give birth? I am strongly tempted to scour Pubmed....

Oh and don't look. By God don't look. Get the midwives to check you. But for the love of everything, don't look

Sorry, you did say 6 months ago

3rd degree tear here. Recovery was a walk in the park, despite having health problems that could have made it worse.

The elective c section I had second time around was hell to recover from, despite loosing have the blood I did the first time.

Just follow all the advise the hcp give you and enjoy your baby. Congratulations.

OH no googling it was a mistake i did the same and freaked out. I'm assuming your obgyn stitched you well you really will be fine. Take all the painkillers they offer and laxatives! I'd say mine felt better after 2 weeks and genuinely fine after a month. I'm exercising now lifting heavier weights than ever before and notice no difference. If you don't get post natal perineal physio i'd advice looking for it. I did 10 sessions of that which i'm sure helped.

OH and get your OH to go out and buy both prunes and prune juice and horse them both back.

You'll be fine! I had two easy births in the following 3 years. Drink loads of water to dilute urine, take stool softeners, long floaty dresses to let air circulate. Be kind to yourself.

Google Wide Local Excision and vulvectomy to get healing tips from women who've undergone extensive vulval surgery. Lots of useful advice on forums.

Hello! Hang in there! I know it might feel like it's never going to get better, that the pain is excruciating and that things might never be the same again. I felt like that. I'm fine now. And it was all fine within about 12 weeks. At the time, it seemed like a horribly long time. I had an episiotomy and stitches so not the same. but similar? Here's what got me through - popping ibuprofen like they were smarties during the first few days, lots of salt baths (sitting/ ducking my bits in a v v shallow, warm bath into which I'd poured loads of salt - regular, old, cheap as chips table salt. The midwife recommended this. It was heavenly. Did it several times a day sometimes). I tried arnica - didn't notice any effect, not sure if it did anything. Sitting on special cushion arrangements to relieve the pressure when sitting and sitting on ice packs to numb the pain. I've since discovered that you can buy ( or hire from nct, special freezable, ring- shaped things to sit on that avoid pressure on the painful bits. Someone also told me recently of an alternative use for ice pops - I wish I'd known about this when I needed it! Good luck! Ps it all healed up nicely - try not to worry x

I had a 4th plus button hole plus episiotomy 😱 11 months on I'm completely fine. As others said take the lactolose, fibre gel, and pain killers. Try not to drag that part of yourself off the bed or chair. I also got some gynae compresses from boots which were amazing. for you, and CONGRATULATIONS.

I also had a 3a with DS1. He had no ambitions to be a superhero, just a rather large head! He's 18wks old now and everything is fine - healed well and no problems. Going against the advice everyone else has given, I did use a mirror to have a look and was totally underwhelmed. There was really nothing to see. Maybe I got lucky though. I'd also recommend adjusting the lactulose and fybogel doses to what suits you. I'm veggie and eat a high fibre diet anyway, so they really upset my stomach.

Congratulations on your new baby - stop googling and enjoy!

Oh. And. Lots of dried fruit/ prunes to soften up faeces - makes it a bit less painful

Actually, in hindsight, I don't think the ice pop thing would be a good idea...

When you go for a poo get a bit of loo roll and push up/hold it against your bag and it will really help when you have to push.

Also tea tree oil is good and I actually used to sit in the bath and wee as I held the shower head against me and that massively helped.

Not sure if i had a 3rd degree tear but I did have 10 stitches after my first.

I had a 3b year 9 years ago. Forceps and tore from episiotomy. I have healed but it was a slow process. I wasn't given a follow up until 8 months as they had forgotten about me but they said I healed better than they thought I would. I was initially told not to give birth naturally again but after the follow up they said I had a choice but if I did give birth naturally the damage would be worse.

I used fibrogel and painkillers and sat on a foam cushion for a while. It was sore. Had to walk slowly and not take too big steps. Make sure you do pelvic floor exercises! I did have quite a sense of urgency from pooing for quite a while, over a year. Never had an accident thankfully but when I needed to go, I needed to go. It's better now but not the same as before. I have also suffered a lot of anal fissures since as well but they heal by themselves and I haven't had any for a while now.

I never had the slightest inclination to look. I was being stitched for about 45 minutes so I have no idea how many I had and I didn't want to know what it looked like. Even though i'd had an epidural, I found the stitching far worse than labour. It was horrible.

Myheart if you had a 3rd degree year, I'd imagine they would have told you. It's not as straight forward as a few stitches after birth. There can be permanent damage and further surgery required and they won't let you leave hospital until you have been to the toilet. Also straining is not required!

Another one with no significant long term effects. 3C tear from very fast birth (spent longer in surgery afterwards than I did in labour ). Needed to be near-ish to a toilet for a month or so after, but gradually my continence and confidence returned!! I wasn't in any massive pain, only needed ibuprofen for a couple of days. Still would prefer to wee before going on a trampoline just in case but that's about it for long term side effects!

I had a 3b tear with my first baby nearly six years ago. Walking was a challenge in the early days and I still found it a little sore to sit on the seam of jeans, etc for a couple of months. That is, apparently, normal. I had a follow up around 12 weeks when a gynae checked the sphincter muscle's healing using ultrasound. Also had appointments with a woman's health physio.

Agree that stool softeners are essential for a good while! Movicol is great.

Healed with no long term continence issues, although sex can still be painful (not to mention smear tests - scar tissue doesn't like to stretch).

For my second baby I flat out refused a vaginal birth and had a lovely elective section.

I had a 3rd degree tear second time (1st was EMCS and still got a minor tear and stitches from the effort of pushing for two hours )

I think my main problem was that I was already on crutches from SPD so was already weak and sore around my pelvis from that, and the birth/ tear aggravated it. I ended up going to an osteopath when DS was 13 weeks because I was so fed up that it was still too painful to walk up a short hill home.

I barely left the house in the first month because of the pain and laxatives. Once the lochia had gone and my bowels returned to normal function, that helped my independence a lot. Most of the first month, I sat on cushions and frozen sweetcorn.

No physio offered. Contradictory advice on pelvic floors, one MW said I needed to allow some healing first. She was the one who was deeply unimpressed at the quality of the stitching, then aghast that it was done in theatre, therefore by senior staff. I did get a bit of an infection.

I haven't sold it well have I! SPD really, really didn't help though. Long term I'm fine. I have to be cautious about skipping/ trampolines and ensure I have protection against sneaky dribbles. Most of the time I'm fine when running, but a fast sprint does cause leakage. It has gradually improved and now DS is 4, I'm still noticing that it's better than a year or two ago.

Compared to my EMCS, I had a lot more strength and energy and felt better able to care for baby, but the early days were more painful. The SPD was much slower to resolve in comparison.

I did have a 3m review at the hospital.

When I was pregnant an episiotomy was my biggest nightmare due to me reading a horror story about someone having one and then suffering a third degree.

Imagine my delight when I was told (during labour) that I would have to have an episiotomy. I voiced my concerns about the third degree tear but was reassured that this only happened to a Tiny percentage of women.

I had a spinal tap and still recall the surgeon saying 'That was my fault'. I stayed in the operating theatre and was later presented with a photocopy telling me how to deal with my third degree tear.

The tips above are all great - I never looked. EVER.

I took daily baths with tea tree oil (I think this helped a lot).

I took the prescribed painkillers regularly. When I forgot I felt sore. I worried about becoming addicted but the doctor reassured me it would be fine and it was.

I took lactulose to keep my poo soft and used the moist toilet wipes - these were great for the first few weeks after birth. I also liked the massive big maternity pads from Boots.

I was very lucky and had no issues with leaking or pain or lack of sensation.

I went on to have a second vaginal with no issues and a 2nd degree tear.

Someone up thread recommended physiotheraphy. This wasn't routinely offered after my tear but I believe that it is now (in my area at least).

I had it after my second birth and the physiotherapist said that most of ge damage/weakness she could feel was a result of the third degree tear in the first birth.

If you can't get that on the NHS it might be worth trying to look into paying for at least one private session - it really was beneficial for me and I feel like more women should be offered this after birth.

For me it really was not as bad as expected - the fear was worse than the reality. Good luck and take care of yourself!

Another 3rd degree tear here. Also as a result of a hand over head baby, who also unfortunately suffered a minor arm fracture during childbirth.

Never had any lasting problems but the first few weeks were horrendous as the person who stitched me up could only ever have qualified as a butcher.

I had one with Baby 1 - same as everyone else, don't overdo it and keep taking the lactulose!!

My episiotomy after #2 was worse afterwards tbh and #3 was a dead easy birth with just a few stitches for small tears after.

I healed really well - hope you do too!

Congratulations on the birth of your baby. I had a 4th degree two years ago and it healed amazingly well. Excellent suturing job from Obstetrician and other than the early discomfort I've been fine.
Currently 32 weeks pregnant and I've been told the chances of recurrence are less than 5%.