Summer childcare issues with mother
Happyhappyveggie · 09/07/2017 19:17
I have a terrible relationship with my mother- almost no contact but I keep it civil for my children.
She has grudgingly offered to have them for a week at the start of summer (she's only seen them for 3 hours since last November) as long as they go to her- 300 miles away. DS 9 is fine with this but my DD 5 understandably doesn't want to go and be away from me & her dad for 5 days. I have asked mother to come here instead but she is making a massive issue out of it.
Now I am inclined to book them into summer club. Aibu?
*Am trying to make sure they have a relationship with her. I would add (and this is the source of the virtual no contact) that she has visited her husbands grandkids on multiple occasions in the last 6 months and is going on holiday with his family and grandkids for the second time in 6 months - both for 2 weeks. She has seen her own grandkids for 3 hours in 8 months.
longestlurkerever · 09/07/2017 19:22
I don't really get this tbh - how has she "grudgingly2 offered to have them for a week? A week is full on - anyone would be hesitant at the responsibility of it surely? But she offered? Or did you ask for help with childcare? My mil and dm are very hands on and regularly do childcare for us but have only ever had them for 2 nights max and that was them both doing it together.
drspouse · 09/07/2017 19:23
If she sees them that little I wouldn't be asking her to do childcare. My DM sees my 5yo more than that but not very often, similar distance, I wouldn't expect him (DS) to be comfortable with her all day every day for a week as she's an unfamiliar non-childcare-professional (she did, in fact, work as a teacher but secondary school and was not into "entertaining" her pupils).
BuggerLumpsAnnoyed · 09/07/2017 19:30
Why do you want them to go there?
You say she "grudgingly" agreed. She doesn't want them there. They don't want to be there and you don't sound keen. Just sack it off.
Too be fair though, if she doesn't want then in the first place, you are pushing it a bit to insist she has them at yours.
Trollspoopglitter · 09/07/2017 19:31
So you think she's a narcissist and her husband is controlling but you insist your young children must be subject to her? Even when you don't want to be? Because... Oh wait, you have offered no valid reason except spite. She spends more time with husband's grandchildren than her own.
NellieFiveBellies · 09/07/2017 19:32
This reply has been deleted
Message withdrawn at poster's request.
To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.