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AIBU?

AIBU to take a vow of silence and never talk again? Why am I such an idiot?!

76 replies

BeauMirchoff · 09/07/2017 11:45

I had an induction day at my new job a few days ago. We had a buffet in the afternoon and some of my most senior colleagues attended. I do know most of them because I worked for them on temporary basis last summer.
As I was talking to two of them (very senior, both 20+ years in the job but very approachable and always up for a good laugh), another colleague approached. And as she did, she said something in French and the other colleague said "oh, I have no idea what you said there" and I, with my big mouth, went "oh, she's swearing at you in French!" It was supposed to be a joke and they did laugh but the colleague who said it didn't look pleased. She said "blimey, you need to sort this one out!" and pointed at me.
I was, and still am, MORTIFIED! Why am I such an idiot?! My big effin mouth i swear, next time I'm juta going to stand there and nod.
Please tell me I'm not the only one whose mouth always gets her into trouble?

OP posts:

Report

AngelaKardashian · 09/07/2017 14:42

She sounds like a barrel of laughs. You, on the other hand, sound hilarious and I'm sure your other colleagues will be disappointed if you take a vow of silence!

nakedscientist the "mum" incident sounds awful!

MeanAger · 09/07/2017 14:47

naked I did that once! My neighbour had a baby and I called over with a gift. There was a woman guarding over sitting by the crib and I said "hi, you must be X's mum, I'm her neighbour" her jaw dropped and she said "no I am NOT but thank you very much for ruining my day" she was neighbour's best friend!! and apparently only 2 years older than neighbour. Mortified!

Smitff · 09/07/2017 15:04

YOU'RE embarrassed??!

I'd have been seething that anyone might suggest that I needed to be sorted out! Who the fuck does she think she is?!

I'd have absolutely nothing whatsoever to do with her in future, on the basis that she's rude, patronizing and arrogant.

nakedscientist · 09/07/2017 15:05

Years ago a boss of mine used a phrase "Once again, a golden opportunity to remain silent, had gone past".

I TRY to remember this.

mean I feel your pain! Its not even that these people really look that old or whatever, the mouth just says things...

originalbiglymavis · 09/07/2017 15:06

That's the type of thing I'd open mouth and say! If someone else had said it I would have laughed.

MeanAger · 09/07/2017 15:06

Once again, a golden opportunity to remain silent, had gone past".

This is brilliant! I am going to memorise it!

BeauMirchoff · 09/07/2017 15:07

Omg! You guys are amazing. You are the kind of people I'd definitely want to work with. And you have made me feel better about my poo mouth thank you so much about sharing some of your stories; the hands-waving-air-traffic comment is EXACTLY something that would come out of my mouth

OP posts:

BeauMirchoff · 09/07/2017 15:09

Thank you so much FOR sharing your stories. Apparently I can't speak English today. Maybe I should try French

OP posts:

originalbiglymavis · 09/07/2017 15:10

In an interview I was asked about a gap in my work history (clearly marked parental leave). I said 'oh, that's when I was in jail'. It just slipped out.

I still got the job though.

flumpybear · 09/07/2017 15:12

I think as some others said she was trying to almost snub you by speaking French, but you just showed her up imo - silly moo 🐮
Well done with the quick wit

MeanAger · 09/07/2017 15:12

mavis

Aintgotnosoapbox · 09/07/2017 15:12

I think it's funny- she was being a bit annoying, but obviously you were slightly controversial too , to the French speaking person- she was put out, possibly embarrassed.
So you haven't done anything bad, just maybe you yourself are not comfortable with the outcome.

nakedscientist · 09/07/2017 15:21

Original 'oh, that's when I was in jail'. It just slipped out

Totally hilarious. I would say that (probably will now).

Bluntness100 · 09/07/2017 15:21

She was excluding you for a reason, she didn't want you to hear what she was saying, you're comment was putting her down a bit and wasn't nice, you were aware rhey senior. But she should have just laughed it off. Is she more senior than you? Would you have done the same if a man had done it?

The worst I saw was a drunken colleague who had clearly assumed a completely heterosexual female manager was gay ( she had the stereotypical short hair, doc martins, rainbow laces, leggings etc and came across quite masculine, late fifties, but she was as straight as they come) and asked her about it earnestly, as a gay woman did she got to strip clubs etc. As we all sat there shaking our heads and trying to tell him to stop. It was really awful, she wasn't remotely amused. He was a total wanker in general though.

BeauMirchoff · 09/07/2017 15:22

@originalbiglymavis this is hilarious! Again, something I'd definitely say!
@Aintgotnosoapbox yeah, i think this is what it is. I just feel...funny and just embarrassed! Even though, I wasn't really rude... i don't think I was!

This thread is making my day!

OP posts:

nakedscientist · 09/07/2017 15:30

Yesterday, I was in Boots and I asked the cashier to look at my millions of vouchers (the ones they send you if you have a Boots card) to see if I could get any discounts/Double points. She took them and said "Have you got a Boots Card?". I said, "No, I'm just trying to annoy you" She did laugh though.

astoundedgoat · 09/07/2017 16:50

nakedscientist Love it. Knowing my luck, I'd get the humourless bint who would then hate me and delete my Boots points.

Fl0ellafunbags · 09/07/2017 16:55

I'm baffled as to why the fuck she was talking about showers in French. Are you working in a plumbers' merchants?

Aeroflotgirl · 09/07/2017 19:17

Or mabey it was 'god she needs a shower' type thing, at you!

BeauMirchoff · 09/07/2017 23:29

Hahaha yeah it was a hot day and I may have been looking a bit sweaty

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Gingerandgivingzerofucks · 09/07/2017 23:36

Pourquoi t'as honte? It was her, not you, she was trying to be clever, rather backfired on her. You have nothing to be worried about and everyone is probably looking forward to working with you hugely.

ZebraOwl · 10/07/2017 00:13

nakedscientist
If it's any consolation, my brother (3 years my senior) was asked a couple of weeks ago if he's my father. I do look significantly younger than I am, but the person asking knew (roughly) how old I am. And my brother might've been looking tired, but, y'know, not enough to age him that dramatically.

(Was hilarious. For me. And indeed Daddy... Not so much the two people on either side of the question...)

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IStoleDipsysHat · 10/07/2017 00:13

If none of the people involved is French, she was being a twat. First senior tried to brush off twattiness by saying they didn't understand her, but you highlighted it in a humorous way. It probably cut what was going to be an excruciating interaction (where she tried to suck up to them and show everyone how good she is while putting others down) considerably in duration. Her reaction to say to seniors that they need to sort you out and the other seniors benign response to her when she set off the twatdar tells me she has form for being what is euphemistically termed 'difficult'. Steer clear of her at all costs, she will probably be out for an opportunity to get even, even if it takes years. If you have to interact with her do it over email, follow up over email with a for clarification you want xyz email etc or have all conversations in front of witnesses. Don't lose any sleep over it but bear in mind these simple precautions where she is concerned and you should have no further problems. Also learn what in this environment is considered acceptable form as far as standing up for yourself goes, so she can't claim you are victimising her, or that management think it's 6 of one and half a dozen of the other.
On the plus side you already know they like you more than the do her

GhoulWithADragonTattoo · 10/07/2017 00:26

I really don't see the issue. You made a mild and acceptable in the workplace joke. The lady speaking French and bosses found it amusing. The woman's comment sounds good humoured to me. I don't any need for embarrassment or thinking the woman was being offensive by speaking French.

Sanoffyhighstepson · 10/07/2017 00:39

Ah the mouth before brain! It's endearing, apparently. When I was still DHs dp, I was invited to his titled father and stepmother wedding anniversary. As the caterers served the food along with brochures of them in their younger days were served, I said, ( loudly) to his stepmother, " oh, you used to be beautiful!!!!"
The room went silent. She laughed and said, " I know but I'm married now?!?"
She loves me don't worry, these things happen 😳

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