To think my husband is an arse for going to wedding without me?

[Mumoftheark]

My husband last week has told me that he is in a considerable amount of debt (CONSIDERABLE) I'm still not clear on what it's from, he's spinning me lines that don't add up or make sense.
We have 2 children and another on the way. Last week he flew off the handle because I saw a pram in the sale I said we should look at saying we can't afford it etc etc.

We had previously been invited to his cousins wedding overseas, and need to rsvp this weekend. I said today that In the circumstances I can't afford to go - he's decided to go without me regardless! I'm absolutely fuming.
If he doesn't have money for a pram how can he have money to go to a wedding abroad of a cousin he hasn't seen in about 9 years 😡 surely as husband and wife it should be a case of we either both go or none of us do. If it was a childcare issue or something I'd be ok with him going alone but the fact is it's financial and I am the only only one prepared to make sacrifices for a debt that I had nothing to do with.

AIBU to think he should not be going?

How are you doing OP?

Your totally right, nowonder he's in debt.his priorities shod be you, famy and the baby.

I'd be giving him an ultimatum that either he comes clean and shows you exactly what the debt is, where its from and what his plan for repaying it is, or go your separate ways.

Otherwise you'll be posting here about being up to your eyeballs in debt trying to bail him out etc etc. Go whilst you have options unless he is sorting the problem.

He's not an arse for going to the wedding without you - hes a total prick for even considering going when he has amassed substantial secret debt and grudges your unborn baby a pram.

That tells you all you need to know about this man.

Are you sure the rent and utilities are being paid or is there a risk they are in arrears? What happens if he suddenly gets to the point where he doesn't have the funds to transfer you money "as and when needed"? Being so in the dark about the family's financial situation would be untenable for me. Sadly I suspect he's not being truthful about how bad things are. I hope you get to the bottom of it but it sounds like you're living very separate lives anyway.