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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To remind you to look after your cervix (cervices?!)

285 replies

FourForYouGlenCoco · 29/06/2017 11:03

I know it's been done plenty of times, but one more won't hurt, right?
So long story short:
Went for (overdue) first smear last year, after DC2 was born. Borderline changes & HPV - sent for colposcopy, they went for 'watch and wait' and asked me to come back in 6 months.
Went back, severe dyskaryosis/CIN III. Back again a few weeks later for lletz under local.

The hospital is an hour+ away. The logistics of it all, organising someone to take DC1 to/from school, trekking baby DC2 back and forth with me - not fun. But I am so so relieved I didn't put it off, so relieved I didn't just assume everything would be alright. In the 6 months between colposcopies, cell changes happened really fast. If I'd left it...who knows?
The lletz was really not that bad either - I was very apprehensive beforehand but it was maybe 5 minutes and done. Minimal pain, minimal bleeding afterwards, and definitely a damn sight better than cervical cancer.

So please, please, PLEASE book your smear if it's due or overdue. Go to your appt, don't bury your head in the sand, don't put it off. I know it's not how you'd choose to spend an hour, but it's really not that bad. And it's so fucking important. So do it.

OP posts:
paperandpaint · 29/06/2017 11:34

I understand that some people might have issues and that is a separate issue that needs dealing with sensitivity and gentleness.

However, there's also a lot of complacent people like me (who left their last smear for 10 years - not recommended) and who just need a kick up the behind! This is what a good friend did but by the time I went I was terrified there would be something wrong with me. YANBU to remind people. It might strike a cord.

McTufty · 29/06/2017 11:37

edmund

I expect what has happened is that rather than OP thinking people are simplistic morons, she is reacting to her own experience, probably feelings a mixture of scared and relieved, and wanted to encourage others to go because she has had a sharp shock of what might have happened to her if she didn't. I don't get the sniping directed to her, I really don't.

OP - I'm glad you're ok and thank you for sharing your experience Flowers

rhodes2015 · 29/06/2017 11:38

I agree op!
At 25 I had stage 1a1 cervical cancer picked up by my very first smear.
Treated with 2 lletz treatments and not a problem since!
6 years later and I'm currently 39weeks pregnant with my first baby. Maybe if I put it off I wouldn't be.

CremeFresh · 29/06/2017 11:39

Of course women have a choice whether to have a smear or not ! They can choose to ignore the reminders same as they can choose to ignore this thread.

I had a smear last year having been too busy , forgetting to book an appt for 2 years. I don't think it's a bad thing at all to share experiences.

MsMims · 29/06/2017 11:40

What would be a reason to choose not to have a smear test? I'm genuinely asking because I didn't know that it was something that people purposefully opted out of, apart from not getting round to it.

My first smear was well over a year late (maybe closer to two as received the first letter several months before I was 25). My reason was the last time I had an invasive examination was for gathering evidence after I had been raped. I couldn't face the reminder and was scared to bring horrific memories back to the forefront of my mind. It took a very long time to confide in my lovely, sensitive GP who consequently did the smear herself with compassion and kindness. Without her I probably wouldn't have been able to face having a smear at all.

Threads like this just used to cause me more anxiety and worry.

DyingToLive · 29/06/2017 11:41

I've been having smears ever since I was old enough to be called in for them. I've never missed one and I've never been late for one. I was always that annoying friend who nagged other women to have theirs because it wasn't that bad really even though I knew they were always horrendous for me. I was sexually abused as a child and always ended up in tears and panicking at every smear test but I plodded on anyway because I knew they were important.

Despite all this I still have cervical cancer. It's probably going to kill me.

Now I'm a bit more mellow about the whole thing. If a woman wants to have a smear test then great. If she doesn't then that's fine too. I'm sure she knows the risks and if she's happy to take them then fine. It's entirely up to her.

Sometimes I wish I hadn't bothered with smear tests at all. I put myself through all that upset and trauma for basically nothing and the end result would have been the same.

Sure a woman could never have a smear and end up dying from cervical cancer as a result. She could also have a smear and then end up getting ran over by a car on the way to her appointment or end up getting killed in a car crash on her way home. Everybody has to die one day and everybody has to die of something.

So speaking from this other side, I say leave other women alone and let them make their own decisions.

XJerseyGirlX · 29/06/2017 11:42

Thankyou OP, I am overdue and have literally just read this and called the doctors to book in for my smear.

AnUtterIdiot · 29/06/2017 11:44

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Vicsteur81 · 29/06/2017 11:45

Really glad you got sorted OP. If you are cool with going for your smear and have been putting it off then a reminder that can save lives, is great!

Some people are saying why on earth wouldn't you go. It's great those people have no issue or worries but some people do. Rather than telling people they SHOULD maybe it'd be better to let those people discuss what might help them feel brave enough to get their smear test. Maybe then we could give them support them to make their voice heard.

Just to be devils advocte. Many lives could be saved by higher attendance at smear examinations but that doesn't mean we shouldn't question whether it's the best way. The number of un-necessary procedure that occur due to confusing smear test results is high, just one reason some people are put off.

amousehaseatenmypaddlingpool · 29/06/2017 11:46

YA definitely NBU!

Glad you're better OP Flowers

EdmundCleverClogs · 29/06/2017 11:47

McTufty, I'm not 'sniping', I'm being as clear as I can that I don't think it's appropriate starting threads like this. I'm very glad the OP is ok, and didn't have any serious long term health issues. However, these threads always go the same way - women patting each other on the back saying how marvellous they are for being big brave girls and going, endless horror stories of 'it could have been cancer' and the astounding ignorance on why some women categorically do not want to have it done.

It is great we have access to such medical services in our country. In fact, it makes me just as cross that women under 25 cannot have one if they ask. However, those who choose to have one done are responsible for their health, there are plenty of reminders from health services without needing guilt-inducing threads such as these.

Northend77 · 29/06/2017 11:50

Well I'm another person who needs to thank the OP for the reminder to get this booked. I don't THINK I'm overdue but I can't actually remember when I had my last one done - it was after I had my girls and they're nearly 3 and considering I've had to have a colposcopy in the past due to abnormal cells it's worth getting it done sooner rather than later

Thank you OP, glad you are ok

stopfuckingshoutingatme · 29/06/2017 11:51

true OP, I am very out of fata and had a cone biopsy done about 20 years ago too

Dawnedlightly · 29/06/2017 11:52

YANBU at all! I somehow fell off the radar and never got an invite. In my mind I'd conflated it with breast screening and it was only a thread like this which prompted me to go for a smear. It had been 10+ years 😳

Cyclebird · 29/06/2017 11:52

Thank you Flowers OP. My reminder letter came a week ago and sat forgotten on the shelf until I read this. I'll ring up today. Pleased to hear you're all ok too.

Slimthistime · 29/06/2017 11:56

DyingtoLive - your post resonates so much.

Flowers
alpacasandwich · 29/06/2017 11:57

Thanks for this OP. I had dyskaryosis at my very first smear and had to go to colp. The scare stories about smears had me expecting the worst but it was absolutely fine and didn't hurt.

Some women are naturally anxious or have MH conditions and I think it's good for them to see a range of experience rather than assume it's going to be dreadful.

Hapaxlegomenon · 29/06/2017 11:58

I'm very surprised to hear people say that you shouldn't encourage others to do something in the best interests of their health. For the same logic, should posters not be allowed to post on how unhealthy smoking is because there might be a smoker who gets upset about being pressurised to quit?

stopfuckingshoutingatme · 29/06/2017 12:00

I have just booked a smear OP xx stay well

stopfuckingshoutingatme · 29/06/2017 12:02

DyingToLive

I don't what to say and I cant ignore your post. sending the best for what time you have left to you. and I hope its good, as lengthy as possible and as pain free as possible. Flowers

Hapaxlegomenon · 29/06/2017 12:02

Also I had my first smear test the other day with a lovely female doctor, and my experience was fine. Hopefully those who are nervous about it can find a GP who puts them at ease.

JunefromAccounts · 29/06/2017 12:03

OP - you didn't say you were facing death, I was quoting another poster. It's likely that your CIN would have been picked up on your next routine smear. It usually takes years to develop into cancer, although I believe 75% of CINIII do not become cancer.

I'm not against cervical screening; I have it and will encourage DD to have the jab. However, it must be an informed choice and hectoring woman to have a test which could have harmful psychological or physiological consequences is unreasonable. You did ask!

For those asking why some women chose not to be screened

read this article by GP Margaret McCarthy

Original poster
FourForYouGlenCoco · 29/06/2017 12:06

Edmund I don't think anyone is a simplistic moron. Like I said, this is just a reminder. I'm not trying to push anyone into anything. And yes, just because it was ok for me doesn't mean it'll be ok for everyone, but I'm just trying to offer a counter to the preconception that it'll be awful/painful/take ages/whatever. Based on my personal experience.

DyingToLive I am so very sorry. There are no words Flowers

OP posts:
DyingToLive · 29/06/2017 12:06

Maybe I'm being a bit oversensitive because I've had to listen to a lot of shitty comments and assumptions being made about me by people who barely know me since my diagnosis, but I do find some of the comments on this thread quite hurtful and insensitive.

Smear tests are a screening tool. They are not a diagnostic tool. They don't detect cancer, they simply detect changes in the cervix which may or may not end up developing into cancer. They are also not perfect screening tools and it is possible to get incorrect results from them. All of my smear tests were always clear however I now obviously know something went wrong with those results somewhere along the line.

That said, I've lost count of the number of people who thought they were being helpful by asking me if I wished I'd just had smear tests or "if only you'd went for your smears, eh, Dying?". I just want to bang my head against the wall because they know nothing about me but of course that's what people will be thinking. That it's somehow my fault this is happening because of course if I'd had smears this couldn't possibly be happening.

My consultant told me that whilst smear tests do save some lives, the number they actually save is often overstated. She herself does not have smear tests which I find interesting.

RubyWinterstorm · 29/06/2017 12:08

Really glad you are ok OP

I always feel ambivalent about smears, partly because I probably don't understand it...but I am not sure I am being patronised by the health service...

So, you can get the HPV through unprotected sex, and HPV is what can cause cervical cancer, is that right?

Do virgins need smear tests then?

If you have only ever had sex with one partner, and have been tested for HPV, is it really necessary to keep the regular testing for HPV/cells?

I feel nobody ever gives me a straight answer. they say "Yes, you do" but that is because you can't be sure your DP hasn't played away, or you might be lying...

I feel I never get a clear answer on this.

Say, if I don't have HPV, and don't have sex, do I still need a smear?

If you have never had sex in your life, do you still need the smear?