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AIBU?

WIBU to give DS2 DS1's middle name as his first name?

71 replies

BlackTowel · 26/06/2017 23:35

We gave DS1 our favourite names! Blush but are having a DS2! It took ages for me to get pregnant with DS1 and never thought it would happen again, so WIBU?

OP posts:
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LeMesmer · 27/06/2017 00:28

Second DS as well, sorry...

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Borangeistheneworange · 27/06/2017 00:30

Most people wouldn't even realise. Who remembers middle names honestly? My DD has the same middle name as her cousin. I didn't realise until sil mentioned it. It's taken the kids 10 years to realise and they see each other a lot ( same school)

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GreatFuckability · 27/06/2017 00:32

I wouldn't. but i also don't think its a big deal if you do.

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krisskross · 27/06/2017 00:34

We have an eight week old and were very close to doing this. But in the end decided that ds 1 needs hos own name as does ds 2.

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ExplodedCloud · 27/06/2017 00:34

Most people wouldn't know or care.
But ds2 might feel like an afterthought because his names will be his for a long time.
There are so many names and you can't find 2 that you can face using? :(

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Oddsocksforeveryone · 27/06/2017 00:44

I am the only one in my family who's name starts with a different letter.
So if post came for 'T Smith' could be anyone but me.
'Mr T Smith' dad or brothers etc.
So although they were all different names they often were also the same.
My mum only used my middle name if I was in trouble, I don't think it would even be noticed really would it? But then I don't run in the kind of circles where people regularly state their middle names.
I can't remember ever meeting somebody and giving my name including the middle, only really on forms.

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Oddsocksforeveryone · 27/06/2017 00:47

@lemesmer none of my 3 (soon to be 4) dc have middle names. My initials are a bit rude which has always made me feel my parents didn't think that one through very well

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e1y1 · 27/06/2017 00:51

My OH has this, (First name is siblings middle name).

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MitzyLeFrouf · 27/06/2017 01:00

It would be weird to me. Put your thinking caps on and give him a name of his own, not a recycled name.

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MitzyLeFrouf · 27/06/2017 01:02

And it would be irrelevant if other people noticed or not I would just hate my child to think I didn't make as much of an effort naming them as I did their older sibling.

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VestalVirgin · 27/06/2017 01:03

Only do it if you then give DS2 DS1's first name as a middle name

I agree.
Otherwise it'd look like DS2 got your second choice of name.

But it'd be better if you could think of another name.

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Ericaequites · 27/06/2017 01:16

It's eccentric. Each child deserves his own name.

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IHaveBrilloHair · 27/06/2017 01:24

It's weird, give him his own name.

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bridgetreilly · 27/06/2017 01:29

Yes. I think it's a dreadful idea. Give him his own name so he knows he's not second-best.

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bridgetreilly · 27/06/2017 01:31

Wow. So many posters missing the point. It's not about what anyone else would think or whether they would notice. It's about the child, who would obviously know that he'd been given the hand-me-down name from his brother. Just don't do it.

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OvO · 27/06/2017 01:56

Well unless you call your child Jetheysh or Ksysybs then they're all hand me down names aren't they?

My youngest doesn't feel any of the negative ways half the people on this thread insist he should. It really is not a big deal.

He has his own identity (insert rolley eyes here), he's not second best, he doesn't feel like his name was an after thought or less thought through.

It's not what I'd have done in other circumstances but it's where we ended up and both my DSs are in no way negatively affected by it.

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MrsOverTheRoad · 27/06/2017 02:01

OvO fair do's to you...you're at peace with your choice but I would personally advise against it You don't have to defend yourself. This thread's about the OP.

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OvO · 27/06/2017 02:10

I know it's about the OP but she's getting a load of negative opinions from people who haven't done this so are only guessing about how it would affect their DC. And as so many opinions are negative I feel like I should make a defence so the OP can make a clearer choice.

When making a decision its good to get opinions from people who have actual experience in what's involved. I don't mean that to sound snooty. Just that it's a lot easier to see how things pan out in RL iykwim.

If others have done this and it's not turned out well that'd be just as helpful for the OP.

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MrsOverTheRoad · 27/06/2017 02:20

Well OvO they haven't done it because they don't think it's the right thing to do!

All children are different so your opinion is based soley on your child's experience...it's not a reasonable way for someone else to make a choice...basing it on someone else's child.

I would have thought that the large proportion of people who DO think it an odd thing to do is more informative than anything else.

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OvO · 27/06/2017 02:27

I wasn't expecting the OP to do anything based on my one opinion. Obviously. Just trying to put across that it doesn't have to be the negative thing most people assume it to be.

I thought I'd been clear.

Just giving my opinion same as everyone else. Thought the OP would be interested as I've done the exact thing she was asking about.

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OlennasWimple · 27/06/2017 02:39

I would bet everyone saying it's fine is not a second son or daughter...

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FreeNiki · 27/06/2017 02:41

One of my exes middles names was Edward.

His younger brother was called Edward.

Cant say it caused any issues.

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ThroughThickAndThin01 · 27/06/2017 02:42

We considered this.

But decided it was just too strange.

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troodiedoo · 27/06/2017 02:56

Please don't do this. You wouldn't give them the same first name. Let him be his own person. Their last name is presumably the same?

They might think it's cute up until the teenage years. But I can foresee accusations that ds1 is the favourite.

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MaddiesMummy2012 · 27/06/2017 03:00

@OlennasWimple actually, I am a 2nd daughter and have this! My middle name is my sister's first name, it really doesn't bother me. There have been points in my life where I thought she was favoured (mainly when I was 13 Grin) and points when she thought I was, but that's never been because of our names!

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