To wish that someone would discover my secrit?

[GetTheGoodLookingGuy]

We have magnetic letters on our fridge, which my brother bought me just before we last went on holiday, in memory of the previous holiday which had magnetic letters on the fridge, where we indulged in a childish game of editing the other person's words by as few letters as possible. The best bit was when he wrote "homophobic nutter" and I changed it to "homophonic butter". Anyway...

The letters went on holiday, and came home and now they live on the fridge. For a while, we were changing the writing several times a day, now it can be weeks before inspiration strikes.

A few months ago I was doing some colouring with a child, and came home with a picture of an octopus, which I proceeded to put on the fridge, stuck there with the letters "octapus" (it's a cheap set - only one of each letter). Later, I decided to write the word "secrit" behind the picture - it's now stuck on at the corners with other magnets, with a small but I think noticable bulge where "secrit" is written.

That was about a month ago, and no one's seen it! I keep checking, because I'm sure if someone found it, they would change it to notify me they'd seen it, but no one has!

So, AIBU to wish that someone would discover my "secrit"?

And whilst I'm waiting, what are the similarly silly things your family does?

OhGood, no punctuation, unfortunately. I could use the j upside down as an exclamation mark, which we do sometimes.

Syc4moreTrees octapus was deconstructed to write secrit, so no need for an additional t, or s, infact.

I wonder if it might work to use the remaining letters to write something big which begs a response, so that someone tries to write something and goes looking for the "missing" letters. I could write one of my brother's names and 'po' rather than poo with the letters I have left, but he might not get I mean poo... he'd need some of the letters in secrit to spell my name...

my dds and I have alter egos....a posh set and a chavvy set..we lapse into these often..sometimes in public...have been going for years...exdh didnt get it and dp doesnt either...must be a girl thing

More things: we say "I weed a nee-nee" if we need the toilet.

We use crubbish as a word, which comes from when I was at school and a teacher asked us how our team was doing in the football tournament and one of my friends started to say crap but changed it to rubbish.

We also use the word "abdopted" which describes the act of both abducting and adopting something which doesn't belong to you - for example a pen - and then using it as your own.

We pinch punch first of the month, but I have an advantage over my brothers, as I do it to wake them up in the morning.

Lol at some people disbelieving the OP. You should have done the I remember when this was all fields, pombears etc.
We are a bit boring in this house. I did used to voice my old dog but dd hated it and I'm not allowed to do the new one.

I don't 'voice' my pets. They have their own voices which happen to come out of my mouth. Our pug calls me 'oh mummmmaaayyyy'.

Me and DH do a hand dance making our hands into flamingos to the music on Greys Anatomy. My flamingos are much more creative and sometimes do mermaid dancing.

I also pretend to be a mermaid when watching tc, and shout 'look at me! I'm a mermaid'. DH does a cowboy dance including imaginary lasso spinning. He also does Guinea pig eating if you feed him something.

We're too weird to have friends.

These are fabulous!

My whole extended family does this thing where after you say the name of a certain desert there's another phrase you must say straight away or you'll get a punch in the arm. Makes ordering in restaurants embarrassing! It's kind of spread to other family and friends too. Or if the word is mentioned on TV one of us will punch another.

I like to change my mum's ringtone to Xmas songs when it's not Xmas. I can just imagine how embarrassed she gets when it rings in public.

When I'm at my mum's with DSis (we're both over 30 BTW) and we hear her coming we'll lie down with our tongues sticking out and mum will have to say 'Oh no! They're dead!' while we giggle and can't stay 'dead'.

If I'm in the supermarket with my sister and we wonder off from each other we do bird noises to find one another again e.g. Ca-caw! Ca-caw!

DSis and I can be sat in separate rooms and she'll shout to my mum "Mum! Urglewurgle hit me!" and I'll get told off.

"I like to change my mum's ringtone to Xmas songs when it's not Xmas."

Last year, Urgle, I bought one of those wireless doorbells (it's bloody brilliant, BTW), which has 36 ringtones. We generally use the bog standard DING-DONG - but I get bored, so I occasionally change the ringtone. At Christmas I change it to one of the Christmassy ones. At New Year I change it to Should Auld Acquaintance Be Forgot. At either of our birthdays I change it to Happy Birthday ..... and then at random times of the year I change it to whatever I think is appropriate. I think it has The Cuckoo Waltz - so that one comes out in the Spring! Etc etc

My people!

I like the booze buying protocol nellie

My BIL, opening his birthday cards, was complaining that no one could get the address right. They lived in The Cart Shed and my Mum would put the Cow Shed or the Cart House. She didn't do it on purpose, she just kept getting it wrong.

So now, whenever we send post, it's to the Pig House, Dog Kennel, Horse Stables etc.

This thread has been making me laugh all afternoon... my favourite bit, though, has been the number of posters coming over all Columbo: "So OP, there's one thing I don't understand, you say you have only ONE of each letter...?"

So! I wrote "[DB's name] pou". His name was actually had a y instead of an e on the end, but it did the job. He looked at it, read, "[DB's name] poo", then said "there's no e. Where's the e? It must be lost" and walked away! Aaaagh!

my ex used to really love Matt Allwright (?sp). The Rogue Traders bloke. He watched everything he was in and was a bit obsessed with him.
So I printed out a load of pics of Matt Alwright (I don't know how you spell it!), onto that iron on paper and ironed pictures of his face into all of the ex's pants.
Every pair. I got some of them wrong and ironed them on the inside. Ex didn't seem to mind that much and wore them for ages afterwards.

NotJanine . What's your cat's theme tune?!
hoppadoppa - Yes of course it's absolutely normal to voice your cat. Me and DD do this frequently. What makes it even funnier is if we pat or rub her on her back just above the base of her tail,she starts 'mouthing' as if she's talking. She comes out with some pretty colourful language sometimes.

My DD puts random objects in my shopping trolley when we're walking round the supermarket,just to see of I notice. One time in Tesco's she put a huge leg of lamb in,knowing that is probably the most unlikely thing that I would buy.

My dh and I used to hide a cuddly toy parrot around the house and wait to see how long it took to be found.

They spent a full five minutes playing with the fridge magnets before going to bed stalling!, but didn't find my secrit! They counted and discovered there were six letters missing, but assumed they must've fallen under the fridge. Gaah!

So, I've had to up my game...

Surely they'll find this???

Funny thread - thanks, all!

DP and I have spent some time in Malta. The Maltese word for 'sun' is 'xemx' (pronounced - at least by us - as 'shemsh').

So, whoever gets up first and draws the curtains has to announce either 'Xemx today!', or 'No xemx today!', as appropriate.

My ex and I used to play a game in bed called pants or no pants. Under the covers you scratch your nether regions and the other one has to guess from the sound whether there are pants in between your fingers and bits or not.

Once worked for an emergency response unit and the jackets had a window in The back so you could slide in your unit name.
We used to slide funny names like 'Animal'
And 'Looking for Love' in the men's jackets

urglewurgle 😂😂😂

Thanks everyone, really had a good laugh at this.

If we can't immediately think of the proper name for something that we are referring to, then its called a 'doofie'... it started out when someone couldn't find the remote for the tv, but just couldn't get the word out for some reason.

We have this thing if we are going somewhere in the car... if dd asks where we are going, we shout ANYWHERE. this came about as on my gps there is an option to press if you want to meet up with a particular road, or you can just push the line that says anywhere (ie any road). So dd is navigating it, she says where must I push, I say Anywhere (meaning the line that says that) so she is pressing all over the screen, says, but if I push anywhere it doesn't do anything... we laughed for ages about that.... so now off on a trip, one will say, where are we going, we all shout Anywhere....

So silly... yet hilarious...

My kids hate Dunelm Mill. They say it is the most boring shop in the world. If they ask where we're going, I tell them we're going there.
It's on the same estate as the cinema, bowling alley and Frankie & Bennies, so sometimes I can carry it on till we get to the car park before I do a quick right and reveal the treat I had planned.
Now they are a bit older they are onto me, but we still pretend, and if they are misbehaving I still threaten them with Dunelm Mill.

This is a great thread, and has really restored my faith in humanity :-) We have a lot of long and complicated songs about poo, based on real songs, which I made up when DS was a baby, but we still sing them whenever he does a poo (he's 5 now; won't be long till he finds it embarrassing, I guess). We also talk in random Russian and Latin phrases with mad accents. I studied both but have forgotten most of it; DH has picked some up from me. Actually DS is best at the Russian as he has a Russian friend at school. And we shout out funny place names when we go anywhere, only now it's become normal place names in a funny voice (amazing how humorous Watford can be...)

I make DS smell my farts, then rate them.

When I want DCs to do something, I say "As your maker, I command you."

When I was little my dad and I would spend days on end speaking in weird, gruff, high pitched voices, a bit like the comedian Bobcat Goldthwait, just to annoy my mum.