Should I take the job when I cheated to get it

[Fuzzywuzzy1]

Name changed.

I'm rubbish at interviews and had failed at over 7 over 6 months.

I had a job coming up and I knew there was a friend of a friend who could help me. I admit I was manipulative. I gave her a bit of a sob story about how I was so depressed I couldn't get a job (it was true though). Knowing she would put a good word in for me.

So she told the hiring manager I was brilliant and the person she wanted to get the job etc. She worked for the same department previously and was very well respected so this personal recommendation mattered. But while it helps there is a 'merit' based system so while it's not point based it's an overall mark for your answer.

So the friend found out the questions beforehand for me and rang me to give me them and then sat down with me the following week and told me what to say for each one.

When the day of the interview came I obviously excelled as I knew the questions and answers. There was one question I didn't know but gave a good answer anyway.

I got the job and was delighted. I am qualified for the job and competent but I'm so so rubbish at interviews.

As my start date goes nearer I my excitement has gone.

I cheated.

I would not have known the answers without help and had a HUGE advantage over the other candidates. I don't think I would be sacked if found out and there's no way they could prove it anyway but I just feel bad.

Like I've not got the job on merit.

But then loads of people get jobs because of who they know every day.

So maybe I should forgive myself.

AIBU to feel really guilty?

[AnnaNimmity]

(and agree, as an employer, I would sack you if I found out, no matter how good you were at the job). (and I'd sack the other person too).

[NellieBuff]

It just gets worse and worse. Hopefully a good grasp of grammar is not required.

[OhWellNeverMindEh]

Nicking a biro is worse....that's stealing.

The op hasn't taken something that belongs to somebody else, she's been given a helping hand (which is technically cheating, I know) to get a job that she's qualified for and reached interview stage for

They both didn't behave impeccably and the tactics were questionable but WHAT SHOULD SHE DO?

Honestly, those who think this is reprehensible and possibly a sackable offence, what should she do?

Would you, hand on heart, not take the job? (I'm guessing you'd say you wouldn't have 'cheated' in the first place).

[Fuzzywuzzy1]

Don't worry. My grammar when writing reports is completely different to my grammar when using a phone on an Internet forum

[akaWisey]

So this was an entry level post?


Did you bother to read the person spec and the job description OP?

The mind boggles. I really hope you're not joining my organisation.

[Fuzzywuzzy1]

I'm competent in the job and qualified to do it. More than qualified. I just needed the chance to be hired.

So many people felt sorry for me and wanted me to get a job. This is why the friend of a friend stepped in. She had worked on a different team to me for months so knew me professionally. She knew I was good.

[IrritatedUser1960]

Who cares, you needed this job and you got it. Take it and do the best that you can, work hard.
I'd do this if I was desperate for a job.

[OhWellNeverMindEh]

Hopefully a good grasp of grammar is not required.

Unnecessary.

[OhWellNeverMindEh]

Sorry, I meant the pp's statement ' Hopefully a good grasp of grammar is not required.' was unnecessary.

[Code42]

You're not the social worker who's been posting about not being able to get a job from an interview, are you?

Even if not, the fact it was technical questions makes it even worse. You don't have the knowledge for this job. Is it in the public sector?

[NellieBuff]

Seriously - this new job involves law and legislation - did they not teach you about ethics and how they should be applied in the workplace etc. Thank God you are not involved in my area of research you would be a serious liability.

[inapinch]

Back when I was at university there was a thriving black market in the buying and selling of essays, this was long before the days of plagiarism software obvs

I went on to work in a large institution and in all the years I was there we rarely recruited an outside candidate at management levels because we all wanted to help the internal candidate.

It happens all the time all around the world and no one thinks twice about it. It's only on mumsnet that some people appear to live by a totally different smug moral compass compared to the rest of the world.

[Fuzzywuzzy1]

I have the knowledge required. I'm newly qualified it's expected I won't know everything.

I have a distinction in my field.

[Code42]

And there's a world of difference between not being good at interviews and not knowing the answer to information that the job relies on.

[Fuzzywuzzy1]

I'm not for a single second saying what I didn't wasn't wrong.

I actually agree it was an feel bad.

But I absolutely don't, for a single second, think I'm not competent for the job as I am.

[akaWisey]

I'd look confident at interview if I knew the interview questions in advance. Pretty much anyone would.

But the other candidates didn't get to compete on a level playing field did they.

[Code42]

Well, as long as it's the private sector, as they'll fire your sorry arse if you turn out not to live up to your assertion that you're competent.

If it's the public sector, on the other hand...

[NashvilleQueen]

To be honest it doesn't come across as though you have any concern for it at all. More that you're rather pleased with yourself.

[inapinch]

Ignore all the pearl clutching op. In a lot of quarters your determination, manipulative skills and ability to network successfully to gain a successful outcome would be admired and considered a desirable skill set.

[peachgreen]

Getting the questions beforehand was slightly dodgy but could be explained away as being resourceful / prepared / networking, and I think is excusable given you obviously have a performance problem at interview.

But your friend giving you the answers was cheating. Why couldn't you have gone away and prepared them yourself? Essentially you just repeated what she told you to say - you didn't get this job on your own merits at all. I'd feel terrible.

[chocorabbit]

You do know that nowadays people use their connections to get a job and recommendations count a lot!

I have known of people who were not only given the answers to questions but did NOT study them and still interviewed horribly due to their arrogance and false security they felt because of their connection. Managers were not amused and were at connection. At least you studied the questions! WELL DONE! I hate arrogant people who not only use their connections to get the job but also to STAY ON the job and despite their incompetence take all promotions, overtime, good projects etc.

[B19M]

Why don't you ask for this thread to be deleted now OP?
Nothing more to be gained from the thread & there seems to be a lot of OP bashing.

[Fuzzywuzzy1]

I wouldn't have known how to formulate the answers or what they were looking for. How much detail to go into etc.

Now I know that I will be fine in other interviews. I will also have more confidence and knowledge after this job if I ever need to apply for other jobs.

I just need to get my foot in the door.

[Fuzzywuzzy1]

I don't need it deleted.

There's more positive comments than 'OP bashing'

[chocorabbit]

Ahhhh, newly qualified too, a catch-22 for not securing a job no matter how much competent you might be, a lot of times. Once you get the experience that's it!