To be constantly pissed off at his online manner?

[strea]

Right, this is going to make me sound incredibly pedantic but here goes.

I have been seeing a man for around 6 months. He's funny, kind, sweet and intelligent, and childless though I have a toddler from a previous relationship who I'm not letting him meet until I'm absolutely sure things will work out.

At first, I was properly head-over-heels for him. However, in the past month or so I've started to become increasingly pissed off with him just about every conversation we have over text or Facebook messaging.

I'm aware this is incredibly trivial and pointless but it started off with small things, like him not using any punctuation at all in messages, constant abbreviations (think 'with you people' to 'w/u ppl'), and the heavy use of 'ironic' kisses after everything (eg. xoxoxoxox).

He has no literacy problems, he is extremely intelligent and articulate and he knows I'm pedantic about grammar. If it was just occasional I wouldn't care less, but the fact it's constant in just about every message that it drives me up the wall.

He's also the worst for not only double but quadruple texting. Every conversation we have online irritates me and it's as if his whole online manner is a completely different person to who he is in real life.

I'm prepared to be told that IABU and I know it's something incredibly minor. It just pisses me off and I have no logical explanation for why, as it never used to bother me

Can imagine if he didn't text you of an evening you'd be posting here about how your boyfriend ignores you Just a thought OP.

Just ignore the repeated texts from now on. If he makes a fuss just say "I was busy". His reaction will tell you whether he's a lovely man who is desperately in love with you, or just a controlling bastard.

The only people I know that don't abbreviate in text messages are of my parents generation and older for the record

I'm 32 and have never used text speak!
I only use text messages for short, direct communication e.g 'what time will you be home?' so no need for abbreviations that I can see!
FWIW none of my friends and family use text speak either.

Corbyn's are you a teenager? Even my 16 year old doesn't use text speak, nor do any of her friends.

I hate abbreviations on here too so I get where you are coming from.

Don't get the issue with the double texting though I didn't even know that was a thing.

My boyfriend and I often ten text each other just radom things that pop into our head or work gossip. We don't expect an immediate reply.

If he is otherwise lovely then it does seem a shame unless you are looking for things subconsciously.

I was expecting you to say he flirts with or likes pics of other women online.

Do you think that maybe he's in a hurry or just lazy about grammar? Maybe stop talking to him on fb or text if it bothers you that much. If it really bothers you though, maybe it isn't to be.

Good on you for not allowing your little one to meet him til you're absolutely sure.

Get rid.

One of my major specifications for potential paramours is prowess (preferably flair) in written communication.

Absolutely, Cao. I fell in love with my now-DH back when dinosaurs walked the earth and mobiles/email didn't exist, because his letters when we were living in different countries were so good.

Nope. I'm in my 30's and most of my friends are professionals in their 30's/40's. I guess some people see text messages as an informal way of getting a message to someone quickly rather than something that's going to be marked for spelling, punctuation and grammar.
Strange that people on Aibu are so against abbreviations!

CaoNiMartacus and Olive yes! Lovely. Agree. A way with words (full ones, with punctuation and everything!) is very attractive.

YANBU!! This would also irritate the shit out of me too! But I'd be prepared for some backlash replies on here :-( xx

jayho OMG I'd deffo dump a 'loller' too!! I've never in my life used it, and can't bear when I see it used!!

I hate abbreviations on here too so I get where you are coming from.

You're not the only one.

PMSL and LOL at the snobbery in this thread towards the way people message one another.

And dumping someone because he uses ppl and lol's in his texting.

Fuck me!

Sounds like the OP is just looking for an excuse to dump him. None of us would ever be with anyone if we nit picked every single tiny little flaw with our men and dumped them because of these trivial reasons.

No wonder so many women are single.

I'm probably the opposite, I'd be massively put off by someone who wrote formal texts all the time. Cringe. I think he should LTB.

My other half reckons he knew I might be a keeper when I used a semicolon in a text

YABU seeing as how you're fine to use this forum which uses the most abbreviations I have ever seen on a forum!

Talk to him on the phone then. He's your partner not some guy youve just met say online & are doing the written get to know thing! He's intelligent and articulate in rl according to you. Thats what matters surely. Why cant he write/text as he likes? Its his style. I really wouldn't even bother with this as something to be picky about especially if he's a nice and articulate man but its up to you of course. You could trade him for Mr super-intellectual in texts but an oaf in rl. Fgs...pick up the phone

LOL @ MN snobbery r u 4 real

I thought abbreviations weren't needed now as the phones predict what you're going to say. It would take longer to type the abbreviation than the real word. I would dump for this though - he sounds like he's about 12.

I don't understand why it's "snobby" to type texts in full words.

If everything is going well other than the online stuff...stop the online stuff.

Surely that's worth a try before getting rid?

YABU

My other half reckons he knew I might be a keeper when I used a semicolon in a text

A properly used semi-colon would push my buttons in a good way in the early stages too.

It's hilarious that some people think that a preference for actual language rather than

-RU cmin out 2nite?
-Yeah luv 2 m8, wot time?
-bout 8ish. mt u in twn
-gr8. cu then

is 'snobbery'. If you can't get your fingers to type 'you' or 'four', or think 'sry' is a big improvement on 'sorry', then we are never going to be bosom friends, and I will definitely never sleep with you. I would love to think that endless reserves of subtlety, intelligence and a wide-ranging intellect lie behind your LOLz!!! and Gr8!!!, but sadly, I will never find out.

It has exactly the same fingernails-down-a-blackboard effect on me as the words on a recent thread about Hubster/hollibobs/spends/Crimbo/chillax/bubba etc etc.

What are hollibobs?? (Misses point of thread!)

I'm with you OP. Hate text speak! Dump, dump, dump. There are certain lines I couldn't cross- this being one of them. (See also fussy eating- my friends think this is hilarious).