To think this isn't normal?

[JuicyStrawberry]

Grandparents giving a kiss/cuddle to grandchildren in the order oldest to youngest . Is that normal?
Imagine the youngest wants a cuddle and I push him away because the rule is the oldest has one first. So nasty!

Strange but not nasty. Youngest just waits their turn, they don't need to be "pushed away".

Not normal! Weird sorry.

Do you mean every time they get a cuddle they ALL get a cuddle in set order, or is it a hello or goodbye ritual. The latter is quite sweet, the former sounds weird.

It's not that odd.

I often hold my youngest back to let my older ones have a go at something, or talk to someone first.

It doesn't do the smaller ones any good to think they can just barrel in and take precedence.

It does a lot to minimise jealousy from the older ones too, it's important that they don't feel they always have to step aside to minimise tantrums or something.

Why don't you say to your parents/in-laws to stop pushing your child? That's the issue, not the order they say goodbye.

My dad brought the kids home and they had a kinder egg each. He said you can open them when I've had a kiss. My oldest then said "I'm the oldest I should have a kiss first" because he didn't want to wait.
My dad then said you're right and that can be our new rule now. Oldest goes first. I was a bit and didn't know what to say if I'm honest!

And my youngest was holding his arms out for a cuddle and my dad just brushed him off because of what my oldest said. I wasn't happy one bit.

the whole situation is wierd, including your overreaction to it

Out of it all I'd be most concerned that they were being bribed with chocolate to kiss someone though - that is a big no no!

I'd be more bothered by the idea of having to give anyone a kiss before they could opened their kinder eggs. Do presents come with conditions or is a thank you not enough.

And why should the oldest not have to wait. That would irritate me tbh.

So he's only done it once? Sounds like he was just playing along with your oldest child?

A bit unusual and old fashioned but why not

I know it's weird! I guess I am over reacting. I was just a bit taken a back by it. The kiss for some chocolate is weird as it is.

you can open them when I've had a kiss.

I find that the most bothersome part of all.

My oldest then said "I'm the oldest I should have a kiss first" because he didn't want to wait. My dad then said you're right and that can be our new rule now. Oldest goes first. I was a bit shock and didn't know what to say if I'm honest!

I can't see a big deal really and as for "nasty"? Your youngest could have said "I should go first because I have red shoes on today" or any one of a gazillion other equally arbitrary rules. You'll soon know if it's going to be an actual issue or if it just gets forgotten.

yes

I think nasty was the wrong word. Strange is probably the word!

No not nasty. Wrong word.

Oh, FFS, total over reaction. Hardly 'nasty' when you read some of the shit going on here daily.

It was your kid's suggestion and your dad played along. And as for making a mountain over a molehill in relation to the kiss for chocolate thing... Well, unless there's a huge backstory here it's a ridiculous road to go down.

I accept I'm being unreasonable Thank you!

And you can't say fairer than that, Juicy. We all have our moments!

I know we do, definitely.

Yeah I wouldn't be letting ANYONE tell them they had to give a kiss in order to open a gift.

It's that sort of "harmless" shit that ingrains bad messages.

Exactly MrsOver. I'm surprised more people aren't seeing it that way.

Oh, don't worry, there are plenty of members who will "see it that way". I'm sure they'll be along shortly.