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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think this person should be "struck off" from being a lifeguard?

208 replies

chippietea · 07/06/2017 12:28

Stayed on a holiday park well known chain last weekend Friday to Sunday. Sunday afternoon we went into the pool for the first time (we had already looked around it). I took the baby in a float (10mo) and my son and my niece (both 13yo) headed for the slide. I paddled over to near the exit of the slide with the baby to watch them drop out. My son came out first and after he landed in the water and came back up to the surface a female lifeguard (I'll call her L) said to him "there is a gold fish in the water why don't you try to find it?" I had already heard her say this to two other little girls and thought well he is a bit old for games like that and sure enough he didn't take much notice. Then it was my nieces turn. As she came around the last bend of the slide and I caught sight of her the same lifeguard L said to her "Quick!Stop!" before she had exited the slide. So my niece tried to stop herself from exiting the slide and told me afterwards that she panicked and thought something bad was about to happen. She couldn't stop herself from falling off of the end of the slide so she landed in the plunge pool. When she came up out of he water she looked at the lifeguard L and waited for her to tell her why she had told her to stop. But she didn't say anything and was grinning. At that point my niece turned to me and asked me why did she tell me to stop? It was only then that I saw L's expression change as she hadn't realized up until that point that I knew this girl and had witnessed what had happened. So I replied to my niece I don't know, I then turned to L and asked her the same question. To which she replied "it was just a joke". I informed her that I did not think that that is very funny and it was quite juvenile and she said I'm sorry. It was at that point that I found out what this lifeguards name was. I then swam away from her. I was furious. I think it is outrageous that somebody in a position of responsibility as a lifeguard thinks that it is a funny joke to tell a 13-year-old girl who is going down a waterslide to stop when in my opinion she knew full well that she would not be able to stop and make that child believe that she is about to be injured or is in danger when in fact there was absolutely no reason for her to stop. I saw L speaking with another lady after the incident who was wearing a white polo shirt and obviously a member of staff. I decided I would go to reception once we had left the pool to raise my concerns when the children were not with me, I did not want to distress them. I was also not keen on staying in the pool after this incident had occurred but again I did not want to distress the children and make them feel as though they were being punished for something that was out of their control. When I arrived at reception approximately 45 minutes to an hour later I started to speak to a lady and express my dissatisfaction. During this conversation the lady in the white polo shirt entered reception from the back somewhere and the lady that I spoke to at reception beckoned her over. She introduced herself as the sports and leisure manager (I'll call her N). So I told her what had happened and her response was yes I know all about it L spoke to me after the incident. She then began a corporate sounding speech saying that "here at THE COMPANY we don't believe our lifeguards should be viewed as being there just to enforce rules, we believe they should engage with the guests. L told me that she said to your niece quick stop look for this goldfish". Obviously at that point I stopped N and told her that did not happen, there was no mention whatsoever of a goldfish to my niece when L told her to stop, at which point she was still actually going down the waterslide. This was utterly untrue. N said she would speak to L about the incident and she can only apologize. This exchange with N did nothing to pacify my dissatisfaction. I asked N that if she had known about this incident for up to an hour why where we only having this conversation now? She said she didn't know who I was in the pool area. I found it very hard to believe that she couldn't have asked L to point me out. I also felt that had L not felt that she had done anything wrong as N was trying to put across to me why would she have approached N to discuss this matter quite quickly after it happened? I felt in my honest opinion that she had done so in order to put her spin on what had happened for her own reasons, to try and save herself and not for any concern for my or my nieces experience. Not only that but she had lied by telling N that she spoke to my niece about the goldfish which was utterly untrue. I also felt that N had already come to a conclusion in her mind as to what had happened just purely from L's perspective and she had little interest in finding out from me what had happened before she formed her opinion. I ended up logging this as an official complaint at reception and the lady who took my complaint asked me what do you want us to do for you? My response was for me quite simply nothing. I don't want a refund, I don't want a free upgrade, I don't want any vouchers. I want L to be dealt with appropriately because she not only made a child believe that they were in danger she then went on to lie about what happened. Also by my niece trying to stop when there was no need to could have caused injury or harm to my niece or another person. In my opinion this is a health and safety issue and a safeguarding issue. I received an email today again apologizing and saying the member of staff has received additional training to make sure that this never happens again. All within the space of less than 48 hours. I find it very saddening that an adult in a position of responsibility such as a lifeguard has in my opinion abused the power that comes with that responsibility over a child and that THE COMPANY finds it appropriate to allow that member of staff to continue operating in that position of responsibility. To this date I have no idea of L's motives when she told a child to quickly stop when going down a waterslide and I expect that I never will. AIBU to want to stop this woman from being able to continue working in this capacity?

OP posts:
Dingalingalingaling · 08/06/2017 17:45

YABVU for not using paragraphs.
GrinGrinGrin
I gave up reading it too. Hopefully it won't be a written complaint if the OP does complain.

squishee · 08/06/2017 17:50

We need a new smiley for losing the will to live due to lack of paragraphs or summarisation.

HaudYerWheeshtBawbag · 08/06/2017 18:10

Is your life so freeking boring that you want a young girl to be "stuck off" for trying to get kids to have fun in the water Hmm

Honestly get a serious grip with yourself.

pippy3483 · 08/06/2017 18:19

The replies tell you all you need to know and more!! And breathhhhhh

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 08/06/2017 18:20

@chippietea - it doesn't matter why she was doing it! What matters is that it didn't cause any accidents, and she won't be doing it again.

The pool's management have taken your complaint seriously, spoken to the member of staff, and will make sure she gets more training.

What more do you want, for Heavens sake??

Herschellmum · 08/06/2017 18:34

In the nicest possible way ... your making mountains out of mole hills. It was a fairly immature way to act for a life guard but it's not a major incident. Hopefully she will have been told her behaviour is inappropriate... but I don't think it's a sackable offence.

Hope your niece is ok.

jarhead123 · 08/06/2017 18:50

Sorry but I can't read all that without paragraphs!

kali110 · 08/06/2017 18:53

There really isn't a 'quite divide' Confused

NoPressureNoDiamonds · 08/06/2017 18:53

I feel uncomfortable with you talking about this as "abusing power" and "abusing position of responsibility". There are actual cases of abusing power that have destroyed lives - serious abuse. It is distasteful of you to compare this non-event to actual abuse of power. She was having a joke - one that was ill advised - she's been spoken to. She's probably forgotten it by now, so has your niece, so should you.

NoPressureNoDiamonds · 08/06/2017 18:55

And as for "motive" - what was this, murder? Bank robbery? Her motive was having a joke. She didn't think about it. You have given it several thousand times more thought than she did.

Carollocking · 08/06/2017 19:00

Someone's life seems incredibly dull,quick get the firing squad out,I'd have died laughing if I had the will to live after reading it,
Next time can you put a life jacket in for escape

Maireadplastic · 08/06/2017 19:00

I think it's quite funny.

Crazyunicornlady · 08/06/2017 19:02

^^ yes this, real abuse of power can be a terrifying thing, a young lifeguard with a poorly placed sense of humour hardly qualifies for safeguarding YABVU

Darkstarrheart · 08/06/2017 19:05

I don't think you were BU - the 'lifeguard' sounds like a spiteful bitch to me and obviously, she knew she was in the wrong because she lied about what she said ..

urkidding · 08/06/2017 19:20

I don't think you are being unreasonable. However, the company is to blame for the policy. Having fun in the pool is not the same as a child who may be bruised because she came out of the slide in a stupid position, having been told to do that by a lifeguard. So I think you need to complain about the policy and instructions given to staff to their head-office. . Lifeguards are there for a reason, which is safety. They have to have qualifications for a reason.
My daughter has been in charge of young children in a holiday job. She took it very seriously.

Buttercup12233 · 08/06/2017 19:44

I think I take your point OP.

You're so upset because you don't think the lifeguard was just joking around. You think the lifeguard was being malicious and deliberately trying to alarm a child (evidenced by her reaction when she became aware that you had witnessed her behaviour and then lying about it).

I would be angry too in those circumstances. However it sounds like you have made your point and, as it's your word against the lifeguard's, it's unlikely that it will be taken further. IMO you definitely did the right thing by bringing it to the manager's attention.

Forgettheworld · 08/06/2017 20:01

I bet this isn't the first time you've put in a complaint about someone or something.

Marymoosmum14 · 08/06/2017 20:32

I don't think you ABU if your niece had managed to stop on the water slide the next person could have hit her and caused a serious accident. I get that swimming pools should be fun but lifegaurds are there to keep people safe.

Fluffypinkpyjamas · 08/06/2017 20:33

I gave up reading it too. Hopefully it won't be a written complaint if the OP does complain

Dingaling Grin

chippietea · 08/06/2017 21:30

Buttercup precisely!! I am unsure as to why so many people haven't seemed to grasp that!! 🙃

OP posts:
PersianCatLady · 08/06/2017 22:24

I gave up reading it too. Hopefully it won't be a written complaint if the OP does complain
I hope that if she does complain it is a written complaint because no-one would take the time to read it or take it seriously.

NotTheDuchessOfCambridge · 08/06/2017 22:30

I work on the railway, often people get on and ask if said train is going to so and so and I say no (when it is). Seeing the panic in their faces....,Perks of the job Grin

Forgettheworld · 08/06/2017 22:40

I once did a bungee jump and the man shouted "wait I've not strapped you properly" I laughed and screamed because I knew it was a joke and I have a personality. Afterwards I gave him a pretend punch and laughed again and we both moved on with our lives

AbiThorn · 08/06/2017 23:23

Can you edit your post to add a tl;Dr?

Struck off? They don't have a governing body??

SweetLuck · 08/06/2017 23:54

I hate the kind of 'jokes' where people scare or upset people, only to say 'only kidding'. Twats.

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