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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask people to move seats at the theatre

633 replies

Homemoans · 06/06/2017 15:48

My 6-year son really wants to see a play of one of David Walliams on Saturday, the only seats they have left are on the front row but they are 5 seats apart. WIBU to buy the two tickets and ask the 5 people sat in between us to either move up or move down?

To ask people to move seats at the theatre
OP posts:
unfortunateevents · 06/06/2017 17:34

Have you checked direct with the BO at the venue? Sometimes shows which are sold out online still have availability as agents or third-party sellers may be holding blocks of tickets. Also make sure you are on a returns list as people may well cancel tickets, even up to the day of the show. I would check however that front row in that venue (it's the Opera House in Manchester right?) is suitable for a 6 year old. Depending on the rake of the stage and the design of the set, your 6 year old may struggle to see a lot of the show. Otherwise can you not go to the morning show which still has seats left? Or Sunday?

Coddiwomple · 06/06/2017 17:35

I really cannot understand those who would refuse you just because they can

too many threads about people buying the cheapest possible tickets because other people will move seat to accommodate them anyway

people spending their limited budget on a special treat they have been looking forward to who shouldn't be made to feel like they must compromise

I don't think I would mind swapping with the next seat frankly. What about if the seats in front of me were from my party too and we had chosen to be in a group kind of thing? Or many other reasons.

Nothing wrong in asking, but not realistic to expect people to accommodate every time.

ShakingAndShocked · 06/06/2017 17:35

Uber U to even think of doing this - am pretty Shock you're even considering it TBH. Why d'you think they chose the seats they did? Presumably as they, y'know, wanted those seats so then went ahead and paid for them Hmm

Reow · 06/06/2017 17:37

Hang on, those of us saying yabu are not necessarily heartless bastards. That wasn't the question.

I would personally move along as long as my view wasn't obscured and I wasn't being asked to move from a seat I'd specifically chosen. I specifically select aisle seats at all times in cinemas, theatres and all flights for a good reason.

But you would be unreasonable to book those seats with the expectation that whoever is sat in them would agree to it.

Nospringflower · 06/06/2017 17:39

If there is a big tall person in front I wouldnt want to move.

YesMilk · 06/06/2017 17:40

Reow The OP took a screenshot of the seating plan, she's not talking about aisle seats.

KidLorneRoll · 06/06/2017 17:42

I'd have absolutely no issue in moving, presuming I didn't end up behind a pillar. One seat to the left or right is not going to make a difference.

I suspect lots of people wouldn't though, just out of sheer bloody mindedness.

pinksippycupp · 06/06/2017 17:43

What a load of miserable buggers you are!

If the seat move didn't make any drastic changes to the groups experience/view then I don't see the problem. I.e no pillars in the way, splitting into different rows or across aisles, losing an aisle seat etc

I would book the seats anyway if you didn't mind not sitting right next to each other (depends on the individual child I suppose) then just politely ask on the night and see what happens. Only a complete misery guts would refuse.

In the grand scheme of things it really doesn't matter, but mumsnet has opened me eyes to how downright awkward and possessive some people get over their booked seats.

ElleMcElle · 06/06/2017 17:48

Personally, I would be happy to move up one seat for you. From the plan, it looks like moving towards the centre would give them all a better view (assuming no pillar or other obstruction) so they might well say yes if you suggest a move that way... But I think it's putting people in an unfair position if they don't want to move for some reason - if you and your son are already there and he's expecting to see the play, you're sort of forcing them to move. As others have said, I don't really think it's on. I wouldn't do it unless you're 100% certain that your son will be happy to sit 5 seats away from you without getting upset.

QueenOfRubovia · 06/06/2017 17:49

As pp said, the 5 seats inbetween might not actually be just one group. There might be a lot of faffing to get everybody to understand what's going on. Somebody might not want to move, while somebody else doesn't mind.

Far too faffy to wing it. Front row is rubbish for small children anyway. It wouldn't have crossed my mind to think ' ah, there are two seats, now if I can just get them all to shuffle up one when we get there' It's a bit entitled, really.
It seems

QueenOfRubovia · 06/06/2017 17:50

PS Personally, I wouldn't mind moving, but I'd never book the tickets expecting someone else to.

user1495025590 · 06/06/2017 17:50

I think people might offer to move when the situation becomes obvious, but I think it is a damn cheek to put people on the spot by asking them to move,YABU

cluelessnewmum · 06/06/2017 17:53

To be honest OP I find people like you very stressful. If you turn up with a 6 year old and ask to move seats most people are going to feel like a dick for saying no but might not want to (eg I've got a weak bladder so I try to book end of Aisle if possible).

In that scenario people would either say no and risk an embarrassing outburst from you and you giving the evil eye all night (as that's the sort of thing people who ask this sort of thing do that in my experience) or they have to give in to your request but may resent it.

Either way you're making people feel unnecessarily uncomfortable.

If you think your dc can handle sitting on their own buy the tickets, sit down and hope someone offers when they notice you're separated (which I would do but I'd hate to be asked).

bruffin · 06/06/2017 17:53

From the look of it i would happily move, as long as we were politely asked etc.
Your only problem maybe if there is more thsn one party ie a 2 and a 3, so you have to ŕequest 2 lots of people to move up.
I wouldnt give up an end of row though as dh is 6ft 2 and likes to be able to stretch his legs out

ExPresidents · 06/06/2017 18:02

If you are end of row you're not going to be sitting between two split tickets, so there would be no reason for you to move.

ArtemisiaGentilleschi · 06/06/2017 18:07

What are you going to do if all tickets sell out in the meantime? Front row seats often do.
This is actually one of the most U OP's I've seen. Why would you even presume that it's even remotely reasonable to ask someone who has paid and chosen seats specifically to give them up for you and your child?
The entitlement beggars belief.
And don't put him on your knee either blocking other people's view.

Judashascomeintosomemoney · 06/06/2017 18:12

Asking them to move to the right would be totally U. And asking them to move to the left might be U if it means the last person has a restricted view. Our local theatre (literally only a couple of years old) has 'restricted view' warnings all over the place because when you get there you find there are brass hand rails in front of a lot of the seats. For someone very short or very tall they probably don't matter, but if you're just the wrong height it would not be ok to ask someone to move. The last time we went to the theatre it was a very very special, very very expensive trip to take my eldest (who has been very ill) and her sister to see Dreamgirls. For a family of four it was astronomical, just the train fair was GBP150.00. I took a long time to select exactly the seats I thought best for this very rare treat. I am a laid back, helpful, nice person but, if you'd turned up on that day and asked us to move the answer would have been no.

QueQueQue · 06/06/2017 18:15

As a PP said YANBU to ask (I would move looking at that seating plan), but YWBU to have a hissy fit if they say no

ExPresidents · 06/06/2017 18:15

artemisia what does it matter if they all sell out? There would still be two spaces booked by OP and her son so they just need people to move up one space so they can sit together. It's irrelevant if they've sold out or not.

They're not being asked to 'give up their seats' which implies missing the show. They're being asked to move one space along so two other people can sit next to each other.

To some people that seems to engender the sort of rage I would reserve for an actual crime being committed against me but I guess it takes all sorts.

LiviaDrusillaAugusta · 06/06/2017 18:17

Of course you are. Don't be ridiculous

blackteasplease · 06/06/2017 18:17

I wouldn't move because I book the aisle for a reason. That said some peope might . But you take a chance. VVV unreasonable to argue with them or take the hump of they won't move.

LiviaDrusillaAugusta · 06/06/2017 18:19

I always book an aisle seat too - anyone asking me to move would just be told no

WhatToDoAboutThis2017 · 06/06/2017 18:20

I have anxiety. I like booked seats because I know exactly where I am sitting. There's absolutely no chance I'd move even one seat up or down for you or anyone else.

LiviaDrusillaAugusta · 06/06/2017 18:21

Also if someone asked there is always the chance that I would get up and walk out (I don't particularly like possible confrontation)

ArtemisiaGentilleschi · 06/06/2017 18:22

Because then they wouldn't be moving along but still together necessarily, would they? From the pic if all the seats get taken she might be asking other groups to separate just for her and her child.