In thinking the parents blamed me - yet it's not my fault <stamps foot!>

[youarenotkiddingme]

Took DS and his friend to a theme park the other day. I paid for ticket and we went to shop day before to get packed lunch stuff which both parents knew - plus one works at shop and saw us and we told them!

Friend bought packet of biscuits and chocolate with his money to take and mum sent packed lunch and some money.

His friend kept saying he was hungry and eating throughout the day as well as eating lunch I provided. He ate all food from mum, food he bought, packed lunch from me, chips and sweets he brought there and also had dinner on his return.

I did comment he couldn't possibly be hungry but he said he always eats loads. Who am I to disbelieve him?

Anyway 2 days later I see parents on seperate occasions and both commented for length about how he'd eaten to excess and been sick and dad was moaning he'd had to clean it up.

They appeared to blame me saying I didn't control it but I think I can't physically stop a child from eating - can I?

I have said to DS I will not be taking him again - AIBU?

How old are they?

How old? Any younger than 7 and you probably should've stopped him eating...older than that and it's up to the child tbh!

I wouldn't have let a child under 14 in my care eat all that. I say that as a mum of a 14 and 11yo.

Yes you can.

If they've had a reasonable lunch it's okay to say no more for a couple of hours.

Sounds like he had too many sweets and biscuits, which are nothing to do with hunger anyway.

Plus chips mind. Crazy.

Depends on the age?

If a young child after x amount of food I would of said "I think you've had enough for a little girl/boy"

10+ I would expect a child to know how much they can eat but even then if they've had a big lunch I doubt they need chips/sweets 2 hours later

He's 14! Over 6" tall and stick thin.

I did say don't eat more and you don't need more but he said parents packed him extra as he eats loads.

So I assumed (wrongly!) they were politely topping up what I'd bought so he didn't get hungry.

We were out from 8-8.

I also said in cat home when he rang parents and he said they had dinner for him he didn't need it and should text them to put it in fridge for day after.

I took his money off him for a bit as he was walking around with it in his hands desperate to find something to spend it on.

I'd also talked about stopping for donuts and ice cream but did neither as I'd said he'd eaten too much and my own ds eats very little (he's 12) so knew he'd be fine.

14 barring any additional needs is old enough to self regulate and clean up after yourself if you've had eyes bigger than your belly.

I did say to his dad "I'd have made him clean it up!"

I didn't see them before we went or on drop off (he lives over the road) and I don't have their number.

TBH although I thought it was excessive he told me he always eats loads. I have no reason to dis believe a 15yo and have no experience of fully grown teens to know what is normal iyswim?

At 14 it's his own fault.

Ok at 14, you can't really police another person's kid's eating. You can make comment but more than that would be really hard. It wasn't your fault!!

At 14 it's his own responsibility if he easts himself sick.

*eats.

Blimey, I thought you'd say they were 8 or so. YANBU at all.

Eats to excess when not with mum and dad and is so desperate to spend money leads me to think that he may be very restricted with both food and money at home.

My mum was like this with my sister and me so when we did have a little freedom over food or money, we went mad because we didnt have any experience of controlling ourselves as we were always controlled.

the problem with sugar related food is that it is mainly empty calories and the brain doesn't register it as food, then demands more as a result, with the sweets and biscuits being eaten no wonder he still felt hungry, plus the natural sugars in chips too.
at 14 though it's hardly your fault he was ill.

14!!!!!!! His fault. Can't believe the dad blamed you!

TBF they didn't actually say "we blame you" but they both seemed very intent on speaking about it for a long time compared to the quick "he had a good time".

Maybe it's me but if someone had taken my ds out for the day and he'd eaten himself sick I'd not even mention it - I'd just think it served him right!

You did nothing wrong! . You did comment best you could. Take no notice of his parents, at 14 he needs to learn to self regulate. This might be a good lesson for him actually.

If certainly not blame you.

Stupid kid should have known better and will probably do the same all over again.

I have six foot teens and they can eat for England.

as you were out all day, it doesn't seem so bad.

It could be a total,coincidence he was sick.

At 14, they can self-regulate food intake. It's not up,to you.

Also,on days out, it's easy to eat more treats on top,of your normal says food.

Would it not have been the rides/excitement that sent him queasy?