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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think this wasn't a lazy day?

66 replies

yaela123 · 22/05/2017 16:35

Like most people, we love a lazy pyjama day every so often but aibu to think this was actually quite an active day? Friend who I was chatting with said she missed having lazy days like this Confused

BTW DH was working half the day before you flame him for not dong childcare

Drop DD3 off at swimming class, meanwhile take DDs 4 & 5 swimming in other pool

Take DD2 to a b-day party, hang around for an hour, then pick her up 2 hours later

Take DDs 3, 4 & 5 to the funfair at the local park for a bit, then meet friend for a coffee (with her kid)

Spend some time with DS who is revising for GCSEs he's finally realised having a secondary school teacher for a mum has benefits as well as being embarrassing

Take DD1 to the supermarket and do a shop. She love cooking so bought stuff for the big meal she was planning whilst I did a general shop

I thought I'd done quite a bit but my friend went on and on about me having a lazy day, which only made me wonder how busy she must be!

What counts as a lazy day for you?

OP posts:
youarenotkiddingme · 22/05/2017 17:40

A lazy day for me for me wid not involve any such activity that involved swimming with 2 kids and a trip to the fair as well as shopping!

LanaKanesLeftNippleTassle · 22/05/2017 17:41

Can't believe people think this is a relaxed day!! [shocked]

But maybe thats cos you all have cars??

2of those things would be a really busy day for us, but that's because we'd have to walk/bus to swimming, then another walk/bus to party.

For us this takes up most of the day (walking to stop/getting bus/walking from other end etc etc etc)

I can't get over that to some of you this is relaxing!!

We do one thing a day and sometimes thats too much- I work evenings as we have no childcare, so frequently get in at 1am then up at 6 to sort DS out as DP leaves for work then!

ChickpeaFarmer · 22/05/2017 17:42

We had a very busy weekend so have had a lazy day with dd (12m) today. I didn't get dressed until she went down for her morning nap, we had a picnic lunch in the garden with a neighbour and her little girl, then dd had her afternoon nap and I read a book in the sun. Since she woke up she's been playing with her toys and I've been playing with her, mnetting, and drinking tea. I'm doing an easy dinner tonight. That's what I call a lazy day!

Original poster
yaela123 · 22/05/2017 17:46

Lana We don't have a car either, but luckily nowhere on that list was above a 15 min walk away except the party which was a quick bus ride

Having 6 children around is totally incompatible with having a lazy day unless you knock them all out or lock them in their rooms and refuse to feed them. Don't give me ideas Wink

OP posts:
RedSkyAtNight · 22/05/2017 17:47

That sounds lazy to me because basically you've spent most of it doing "fun" activities (apart from shopping).

Our typical Saturday is doing load after load of washing, hoovering from top to bottom, cleaning the bathroom and doing a load of gardening (to stop the garden becoming a jungle, not because we like it). And perhaps one more leisurely thing. I'd love to have a day like yours where, yes, you had a lot scheduled, but it was mind numbingly dull chores that just have to be done.

BeyondThePage · 22/05/2017 17:48

Sounds lazy to me. sorry Blush - full of time consuming "activities", but not a lot of work.

Today I also helped a DD with revision for GCSE's and piano practise for 2 DDs.

But also walked the dog (twice), nipped to town on the bus, at home cleaned the windows inside and out, cleaned the wheely bin (vom!), hoovered upstairs and down, cleaned bathroom, washed kitchen floor and cut the grass at the front of the house, changed the kids bedding and washed and line dried it too... Did online shopping and emails (whilst mumsnetting).

I don't "work" on Mondays (hahahahaha) so stuff gets done then or never...

DeadGood · 22/05/2017 17:49

"That sounds lazy to me because basically you've spent most of it doing "fun" activities... I'd love to have a day like yours where, yes, you had a lot scheduled, but it was mind numbingly dull chores that just have to be done."

RedSky sorry but what the hell are you on about?

BeepBeepMOVE · 22/05/2017 17:51

I think it's a bit lazy. It's very casual mooching around. You just sort of hung out with your kids, you didn't really do anything that's hard work.

Sounds like a nice day but not exactly hectic. Esp. now you've said everything is 15mins away!

XiCi · 22/05/2017 17:51

Your friend sounds like an idiot who is trying to make some kind of point. I can't imagine anyone would consider that a lazy day. Unless of course she has 12 kids Smile

RedSkyAtNight · 22/05/2017 17:52

sorry should have said WASN'T.

As in taking the DC swimming is way more relaxing than cleaning the kitchen!

AliceTown · 22/05/2017 17:53

How is ANYTHING with 6 kids "not a lot of hard work"?

Jeez, when I think about our seriously lazy days (6 kids, in pyjamas, playing with Lego or watching films), it's still a busy and exhausting day!

Also how does fun = lazy? I agree it doesn't sound like a dull day but it doesn't sound lazy at all.

DeadGood · 22/05/2017 17:53

"Wow! I think that sounds a lovely, but normal, averagely active day"

"It doesn't sound massively active"

"it does sound like a rather relaxed and just really lovely day"

"Sounds laid back & not too active"

Sorry, I call bullshit on all of these comments

OP - you can stop smiling through the tears now. The kinds of people making these comments are into the competitive busy-ness game, just like your friend.

There is no way I would be able to get all of that done in one day without some kind of crunch moment where I had to go and lie in a darkened room. But maybe I live in a more congested, busy area than you!

Salmotrutta · 22/05/2017 17:53

Do you have six kids RedSkye - I imagine the OP probably did washing, cooking and cleaning up too - just didn't mention it because it was "routine stuff"?

AliceTown · 22/05/2017 17:54

As in taking the DC swimming is way more relaxing than cleaning the kitchen!

The swimming, sure. The packing up 8 people's kit, getting there, getting changed and then again to get back home ... relaxing?!

AliceTown · 22/05/2017 17:55

TBH with six kids, being left alone to clean the kitchen uninterrupted sounds like bliss 😂

DeadGood · 22/05/2017 17:56

"taking the DC swimming is way more relaxing than cleaning the kitchen!"

Ok, I guess the problem is that we see the world very differently then. Because I would take cleaning the kitchen over swimming ANY DAY. Getting 4 people into swimming gear, supervising in the pool, out, dried, changed, then home again on foot while carrying all the wet kit? Nope. Not relaxing in my book

PolarBearGoingSomewhere · 22/05/2017 17:57

I'm sure OP had to schedule in the usual chores too Confused

That's just life surely, they don't count as activities? If I think about it, I changed all the beds, did 3 loads of washing, went to Aldi, hoovered throughout, made lunch for 3 friends and 6 kids in total, general tidying, cleaned the kitchen, emptied the dishwasher, school runs...

If DH asks (or I was writing on here), I'd say we had friends over, played in the garden and went to the park. No wonder there's such a thing as "competitive busy-ness" if we all have to give a blow by blow account of the mind numbing daily grind in order to not be considered lazy.

Salmotrutta · 22/05/2017 17:57

OP - can I ask if you also did routine household stuff like cooking and washing up etc?

Whilst herding six kids - just in case people missed the six kids bit...

khajiit13 · 22/05/2017 18:01

That sounds like quite an active day to me.

DeadGood · 22/05/2017 18:02

"how does fun = lazy?"

Completely agree Alice - I think lots of people on here are misusing the word lazy.

Just because the day wasn't full of "hard work" (do you work down a mine, beepbeep ?!) it doesn't automatically follow that it was "lazy". Similarly, just because some aspects of it may have been considered enjoyable, doesn't mean it was lazy.

RebelRogue · 22/05/2017 18:20

OP you did more in your lazy day that I do on my active/busy days.

FeedTheSharkAndItWillBite · 22/05/2017 18:25

Right. Maybe relaxing was the wrong word.

But it does sound like a really nice day.

The OP stayed an hour at this party (where, I'm assuming she simply chatted with the parents) and met with a friend.

Those are "nice and fun", not work-related activities with other adults she could talk to. How is this not really lovely?

DeadGood · 22/05/2017 18:32

"Those are "nice and fun", not work-related activities with other adults she could talk to. How is this not really lovely?"

Huh? No one is saying that meeting a friend is not lovely.

But you can see, can't you, that moving from these really lovely activities, straight on to homework duty and then out for grocery shopping - having already been to the pool that morning as well - makes for a reasonably busy day?

No one is saying "what a shit day! Sounds stressful and vile"

We are just saying "nope, not a lazy day"

kmc1111 · 22/05/2017 18:34

I'd consider that a lazy day. It's all fairly nice and routine stuff, and you could have not done most of it without major problems.

A busy day for me would be packed full of must do tasks and appointments and events. Day's where I just have things I'd like to do but don't have to do eg. meet friends, go to classes, take my family somewhere etc. I don't consider busy because it's just so much more relaxed.

LorLorr2 · 22/05/2017 18:34

Your friend sounds like she had some kind of unsaid opinion/point there, if that's the right phrase for it? She either:
Wanted you to know she's busy
Is jealous of some aspect of your life
Is jealous that you did nice-sounding activities
Hasn't been having a good time recently
Feels she's got it harder than you

That kinda thing.

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