Am I weird/a shit parent?

[DrSeuss]

DS, just turned 6, went off on a joint Beaver/Cub trip today. Left just before nine, back around five, (excellent choice of destination by Akela, mega thanks to all leaders for giving up their day.) Just read a FB post by two of the other parents about fighting back tears as they left, worrying about them being OK "on their own" although how a bus full of kids and a half dozen or more adults is on your own I don't know.
So, is it weird that my first thought on hearing about the trip was, "Fantastic! I'll get loads done that day!" And I have got loads done. However, now I wonder if I shouldn't be a bit more "moved"?

You're not a shit parent op, but neither are the parents who were upset. I don't see the need for posting on Facebook about it though.

I'm a Beaver Scout leader and there's always a mix of reactions from parents, and children, when we leave on trips. There's parents enthusiasticly waving their children off through to those who are just about holding back the tears. Some of the most excited and confident children are waving to parents who are holding back tears.

Fwiw all the children on the trips over been on have had an absolute blast on trips and sleepovers. There's the odd wobble but then they get distracted by all the activities and forget all about being upset.

I can't wait till mine are in cubs and go off on trips and I get a bit of peace for a day.

My ds (also 6) isn't anxious, is very sociable and confident BUT it took a little convincing to get him to agree to go to a Beavers camp today and overnight because he's still in night time pants. He did it, but of course it was a bitter sweet moment waving him off. Yanbu to feel the way you do, but other parents have different reasons for feeling as they do. I knew he'd have an amazing time - that's why I wanted him to go - but it's a big deal for him, and us

Well they aren't away really, it is just two hours longer than a school day.

OP I get you. I must have a heart of stone, I remember people being hysterical about their baby's getting their injections and "wanting to punch the HV" whereas I was thinking "we are so lucky to live in a country that these are available".

Neither way is right or wrong.

I'm a gibbering mess of anxiety at ALL times. Do I fret publically on FB? No. Nobody wants to hear my insanity. I'm often the one glibly reassuring other parents in the playground as we drop them off.
The ones that post it on FB are competitive mummies.

Don't move to china we had 11 year olds to stay who weren't seeing their parents for 3 months!

We live in a culture of a) heightened parental anxiety and overprotectiveness, b) competitive performance of emotion. Bring the two together and you have FB posts as in the OP. I think it's extremely eye-rolly myself, and wonder, from the somewhat more chilled culture of Germany (too chilled for my liking on many an occasion, though - you can take the girl out of Britain...), what sort of impact the extreme restriction of children's and young people's independence is going to have long-term (and how they will deal with being the hubs of such intense and displayed parental emotion), but it's less the individual fault of these parents than an outworking of the general culture.

I'd be cartwheeling down the road at the prospect of freeeeeeeedom before the wheels on the bus had started turning. Must be a weird and shit parent too, OP. Ah well!!

Something in a PP leapt out at me just now in the light of my post above. There may be a lot of restriction on children's independence, but there is also a culture in which a 5 (!) yo who likes Peter Rabbit and CBeebies can be described as very young for her age! On the one hand we rush our kids to like 'older' and 'older' media content - characters, books, films - and on the other we really struggle with giving them age-appropriate doses of independence and experience of the world. It's a paradox and not a good one.

I have a very sociable, confident child who lives with her dad half the time, and has done since we split up when she was a baby. Even though she is away from me a lot and I am totally used to that (although I miss her more the older she gets when she is away) it didn't stop me having a complete wobble when she went off to do a sports activity she is involved with for a whole day.

I regularly have horrible dreams about bad things happening to her. I don't suffer from anxiety generally, or share these thoughts with her, and she is loving developing bits independence from me (she's 8) but I can't help it.

For some reason in my mind there is a difference between her being with her dad or at school, which I don't worry about, to her being off with 'other' adults, which I do worry about.

I suppose it's just complex and there's no 'correct' way to feel about it, but YANBU to enjoy your day without your child and those other parents who are upset are not BU either.

mammabear if you're still reading this

People have no clue what people have been through and what makes them anxious. So smug and judgemental, putting other people down probably to make them feel better about theselves.

I hope your husband made a good recovery. As well as the flowers have a lovely cup of and a nice big slice of

Nah, I"m with you.

I've always figured that if I've given permission for my kids to go off on a school trip, with friends, relatives, clubs, etc. I've already reached a decision that they will be safe and secure so I don't have to worry.
Truthfully, I don't even necessarily miss them as they're off having a fabulous time and I'm either catching up on housework or (more likely) blobbing on the sofa eating/watching crap!