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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Well. Am I?

83 replies

Comedyboobs · 20/05/2017 00:14

My youngest DC (6 yo) has Adhd, he sleeps in my bed usually with a body part (foot on my face today) on me. I have 3 older DCs. I'm a single parent.

I'm renovating the house we are living in (timescale is 10 weeks until it goes on the market) and also restoring antique furniture to bring in an income, while I look for a 'proper' job. Im stressed out to the max.

Am I being unreasonable to think this is a shitty text from DBoyfriend:
I really appreciate your antique shite. But stop talking shit about it, it's boring, sell it & send me a naked photo.

I'm knackered & would really appreciate some ideas re replies. I have red flags awaving.
#imusuallyshithotatsarcasm

OP posts:
CherryChasingDotMuncher · 20/05/2017 00:51

Get rid. If he can't even refrain from calling your job 'shit' I'm afraid I've little hope for him being supportive with regard to your mum and kids. Sounds like he's using you for sex, you're more than a piece of meat for his wank fodder, dump him now! I'm sure other MNers can come up with a clever comeback (i'd help but I'm afraid I'm not that quick!)

SurlyValentine · 20/05/2017 00:53

There is no sarcastic comeback to that text. It is hurtful and belittling in the extreme. I am presuming he knows how your day to day life pans out, so if he is not prepared to take some pressure off you and actually bring something constructive to the party, then I'd be dumping the arsehole.

rightsaidfrederickII · 20/05/2017 00:55

Unless this is totally out of character, it would be a big red flag for me.

Plunkette · 20/05/2017 00:57

The only response I would send to that text is:

"please never contact me again"

Swiftly followed by blocking him from all forms of communication.

What a rude, hurtful thing to send you. Flowers You sound like you have a busy and stressful life. Why waste any time on this arse?

SquirrelWatcher · 20/05/2017 01:01

Yes, red flag!

Creampastry · 20/05/2017 06:43

Ltb

Original poster
Comedyboobs · 20/05/2017 14:28

I've slept on it & still think he's being a shit. I sent him a message to say I was pissed off with his comment. He's away with work, hence messaging, not face to face convos. His response was 'yeah' Hmm

It's not the first time he's pissed on my bonfire. A few months ago I got something published in a magazine via Instagram. Not as wanky as it sounds, nothing major. My lovely brothers gave it the thumbs up. DBoyfriend said he couldn't believe I was a media whore. No congratulations.

OP posts:
IJustLostTheGame · 20/05/2017 14:30

He's a cunt.
He will continue being a cunt.
Get rid of the cunt.
Did I mention he's a cunt?

Original poster
Comedyboobs · 20/05/2017 14:32

Yes, it seems that way.
He's a cut.

OP posts:
Original poster
Comedyboobs · 20/05/2017 14:33

'cunt'
Autocorrect is not sweary

OP posts:
scottishdiem · 20/05/2017 14:35

If he offers little in the way of support or congrats then he has no credit in the bank to demand nudes to be honest.

Original poster
Comedyboobs · 20/05/2017 14:37

I gave him a good 'opt out of being a cunt' clause by asking him if he was trying to be funny. No reply.

OP posts:
RedHelenB · 20/05/2017 14:37

If it's not making you any money he may have a point? Only you know whether he means it as a joke or not. As an outsider I assumed it was.

Plunkette · 20/05/2017 14:41

He called you a media whore? ShockAngry

So this isn't a one off then? He regularly this horrible?

Why are you wasting yourself on this man?

Original poster
Comedyboobs · 20/05/2017 14:48

No, I'm not making much money at the moment. My priorities are my mum & youngest DC. I'm looking for full time work. Hence doing what I can until that happens.

OP posts:
anotherpoisonprince · 20/05/2017 14:52

Not just a cunt. A nasty cunt. You'll be well rid.

Plunkette · 20/05/2017 14:55

RedHelen is what way would he have a point?

Comedy's life sounds pretty full on and stressful. Even if her work with antiques was just a hobby it wouldn't be an acceptable comment.

Presumably if she thought it was in anyway a joke she wouldn't have started the thread.

Huskylover1 · 20/05/2017 14:59

He sounds like an utter twat. And rude. I would not reply to anything else he sends you. End of. If he's this "charming" now, imagine how he'd treat you in 5 years time.

Original poster
Comedyboobs · 20/05/2017 15:02

It's a difficult one. He knows what I've been through (unimaginable abuse), he's incredibly protective (which I like, I like to feel safe).
But I feel he's slowly revealing his true coluours. Maybe using what he knows?
Then again, maybe I'm hypersensitive.

OP posts:
DissonantInterval · 20/05/2017 15:03

It was a shitty thing to say. Totally undermining, belittling and disrespectful.

Restoring furniture takes real skill and getting something into print is an achievement too. Even if these things don't mean anything to him, he surely should be able to congratulate you and encourage you and be happy on your behalf when something nice happens such as getting something published. You deserve more than this.

ClopySow · 20/05/2017 15:04

You might be hypersensitive, but even with that, he's still a cunt.

GeekyWombat · 20/05/2017 15:05

What an arse. Is he just having a bad day or is he always this much of a dick?

I'd be tempted to send him a picture of a stripped antique you're working on.

WelliesAndPyjamas · 20/05/2017 15:05

Do you have any reasons for being with him? He sounds like more trouble than you need at the moment.

MargotLovedTom1 · 20/05/2017 15:06

Is he a bit of a 'bantz' type?

OuchBollocks · 20/05/2017 15:07

I think you're being under sensitive Tbh :(

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