AIBU to turn down £12k pay rise because I'm risk averse?

[BluebellGal]

As title says, AIBU to turn down a job with such a large pay rise because I've only been in my current job for a few months and I'm happy there? Have been head hunted for this new opportunity, same role just slightly different market (but one I have experience/interest in). Would be Manager (head hunter) said they wants to hire me and emailed today to ask why I've not applied yet. Should I just go for it, see what happens? I've met the senior staff before, so know a bit about new company.

For background, I moved to my new job after years of being in a dead end job going nowhere. I'm a FT working mum with a young family. Scared of jumping ship to find out I've made a mistake later (I'm breadwinner). We are managing fine on current salary, but the pay rise would allow our family to save for the first time since maternity leave. Jobs in my field not easy to come by close to where I live.

Job 1:
Big company, large hub office
High commuting costs
4 hours commuting per day (wfh regularly too)
Friendly staff
Good career prospects/ profitable company
Benefits standard for industry
Family friendly company

Job 2:
Large company, small office/division
Free commute (close to home)
£12k pay rise inc commuting savings
Friendly but seem disorganised (busy?)
Career prospects less clear but company's growing
Benefits standard for industry
Claim to be family friendly

AIBU to turn down job 2? Surely the time saved commuting and the money outweighs the risk of not liking the new company. I really don't know what to do and need some objective views, as the few people I've spoken to have just said "don't go for money" which I suppose is good advice, so they think I should stay in existing job as I'm happy there. I'm managing ok with the commute and looking after a young family, although it can be tough sometimes.

The £12k is inclusive of ditching the commute so OP could be saving (say) £5k in travel and getting a £7k pay rise.

It's not a £12k + travel costs (say £5k)

Its still a lot of money and a huge time saving.

Work/life balance will be so much better if you lose the commute. That would be enough for me, without the extra money, but with it, it seems a no brainer.

Will you save on childcare costs as well?

Sometimes it's really good to be a slightly bigger fish in a smaller pond, especially if you get in early enough in a company's life. If you can help turn that office into an organised and efficient place then you'll be set up for years to come.

Yes the £12k is inclusive of the travel savings (before tax), it's also a bit of a pay rise too

No I won't save on childcare costs. Currently pay for 3 days of nursery and extended families do other 2 days. DP does all drop off/pick ups. Before starting a family we knew this would be the case so just accept that's the way it is. I do actually manage to do at least one pick up a week so I know the nursery staff at least

Nursery is temporary though. Once they hit school, the shorter commute will be a godsend.

Losing the commute would be the deciding factor for me!!

I'd stay on the same pay to get rid of a commute like that 😳 Heck, I'd probably even go lower.

Dont reply to job offer yet, say to current firm you are getting indications you are worth more in the market with offers and need guarantees of when your salary will rise to x figure (£15k more than you are on) and what is needed to get there. They may offer or say 'do x then you',ll get there... But you should really give the current co the opportunity to get you closer to market rate...a good co to work for is important imo but not as much as 12k work..maybe 6k...

Also you could say to headhunter you want £20k more to move.. the headhunter has directly offered you already without negotiation
..so pressure that negotiation too...

How does DC being at school change things with commute? I'm not being farceous I just want to understand what issues could be (don't know anyone with kids at school). I had thought childcare costs would reduce dramatically- only after school club to pay for. DP and GPs likely to do pick ups (they are happy to). If I take this new job I imagine I'll be home half an hour earlier, just won't have to do so much work in evening

• not being facetious

Good idea about sounding out current company- carefully, don't want to look like money grabber and impatient to get promoted!

Sounds silly but won't be going in hard with salary negotiation as I know more worth and what they are offering is already decent. I may try to negotiate on other non-salary benefits, there is some training I would like for example.

Four hour commute! Fuck that go for job 2

Very interesting to see your initial reactions about commute rather than pay rise

Because you can't put a price on time. The extra money is a bonus but the extra time is time you could be spending with your kid/s

I wouid go for it.
However, without wishing to piss on your chips you haven't actually been offered it yet. The Headhunter could be contacting you off their own back and you might be one of many.
I'm not saying you won't get the job but it's not in the bag yet so you can,are the final decision when you have two firm offers on the table
Good luck

Yep job definitely not in the bag yet, however the headhunter would be my new manager - so not a recruitment consultant.

Move jobs, and really make that money work for you.

Would you be getting £12k more salary plus making commuting savings? Or have you factored the travel savings into the £12k?

Would the extra salary result in CB loss?

You have to look at the whole picture.

If the £12k salary increase takes you into higher rate tax, I would consider putting more into your pension as salary exchange.

Escaping the commute is a huge factor, to my mind!

Ditching the long commute would clinch it for me. But not just for the time saved - I would hate to be a 2 hour journey away from my kids in the event of an emergency with one of them.

So if you don't have to do so much work in the evenkng you could go to the gym, watch a film with your DH, have a leisurely dinner with him, read more books, etc etc.

Look how many women on here are under pressure because their DH's work all the time in the evenings etc.

Also, homework. Once they are at primary you have reading practice every evening, cake sale requests, a sudden need to make an Iron Age fort or an Easter bonnet or a book day outfit by tomorrow morning......

OP are you a man? Either that or you have a partner who is extremely supportive than the average man.

Sun, she is just lke I was (I earned 10x myu other half). Money talks. Money is power. Far too many women play second fiddle to men, put their careers second s not surprisingly are walked all over by men at home.

Instead aim high, take risks, push for higher pay. It pays off both at home and at work

I'd take a pay cut to drop the 4 hour commute.

Time, precious time. Go for the interview. Consider how you can talk with Job 1 and leave positively incase you may join them again down the line, they will understand that the time issue when you have a young family is important.

Job 2 will probably be highly hoping that you can help get them as organised as Job 1.

Good luck!

If the current job is with a big company, chances are they see people changing jobs as just a part of life (rather than how some smaller companies see it as a personal insult).

You won't be cutting off all ties, people come and go and sometimes go back.