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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

AIBU to turn down £12k pay rise because I'm risk averse?

99 replies

BluebellGal · 17/05/2017 20:24

As title says, AIBU to turn down a job with such a large pay rise because I've only been in my current job for a few months and I'm happy there? Have been head hunted for this new opportunity, same role just slightly different market (but one I have experience/interest in). Would be Manager (head hunter) said they wants to hire me and emailed today to ask why I've not applied yet. Should I just go for it, see what happens? I've met the senior staff before, so know a bit about new company.

For background, I moved to my new job after years of being in a dead end job going nowhere. I'm a FT working mum with a young family. Scared of jumping ship to find out I've made a mistake later (I'm breadwinner). We are managing fine on current salary, but the pay rise would allow our family to save for the first time since maternity leave. Jobs in my field not easy to come by close to where I live.

Job 1:
Big company, large hub office
High commuting costs
4 hours commuting per day (wfh regularly too)
Friendly staff
Good career prospects/ profitable company
Benefits standard for industry
Family friendly company

Job 2:
Large company, small office/division
Free commute (close to home)
£12k pay rise inc commuting savings
Friendly but seem disorganised (busy?)
Career prospects less clear but company's growing
Benefits standard for industry
Claim to be family friendly

AIBU to turn down job 2? Surely the time saved commuting and the money outweighs the risk of not liking the new company. I really don't know what to do and need some objective views, as the few people I've spoken to have just said "don't go for money" which I suppose is good advice, so they think I should stay in existing job as I'm happy there. I'm managing ok with the commute and looking after a young family, although it can be tough sometimes.

OP posts:

QuitMoaning · 17/05/2017 20:57

I commute 3.5 hours a day but I do it because I am in a niche job and they pay me very well.
If it was the opposite and it was a 12k pay rise but a 4 hour commute, I would say still worth considering. But it is giving up the commute and getting paid more. I would jump at it.

topcat2014 · 17/05/2017 20:58

When you say 'no sick pay', presumably you mean SSP only.

Do you tend to have much sick time?

I only have a couple of days a year, so more than weighed out by the £12k increase.

Original poster

BluebellGal · 17/05/2017 20:58

Thank you all. Your responses are really encouraging. Just to answer a few questions

Yes £12k (gross) is a LOT of money for me. Much of that is commuting savings.

My family is very important to me. I get time in the morning and evening (1.5-2 hours total) and all weekend. I'm lucky to be able to leave early and wfh in evening to catch up after bed time.

Job is same seniority. Not a promotion. Company has good reputation for people who have heard of it, they are successful, but my current company is a well known market leader.

Re: opportunities, I guess it's big versus small. Lots more opportunities in big company, but you're far from top. Small organisation perhaps more opportunities to hold senior role? I'm not very good with this kind of strategic thinking! FYI I'm middle management level.

My current job is far from perfect (what is?!) but overall I do like it and the people are great.

OP posts:

Believeitornot · 17/05/2017 20:58

YABU

Man alive. You're marketable, you're hardly going to struggle getting another job if this one falls through.

Take it.

MeganChips · 17/05/2017 20:59

Take the job OP. Your work life balance will be amazing, not to mention the extra money. I changed jobs and replaced an hour each way commute with a 15 minute one and it was life changing.

Unfortunately I have since been seduced by another job that pays 18k more than that one but I have to commute for 2 hours each way 3 days a week and half an hour each way (which is fine) the other 2 days.

I'm not sure I would make the same decision again, the commute alone makes such a difference.

Bibs2014 · 17/05/2017 21:00

Go for it!!!

RB68 · 17/05/2017 21:02

the commute would convince me alone

BumWad · 17/05/2017 21:04

Job 2 all the way!!!!

cdtaylornats · 17/05/2017 21:05

You say they are disorganised and busy? Maybe that's why they are hiring

Original poster

BluebellGal · 17/05/2017 21:05

Oh and yes the disorganisation at job 2 does bother me. I'm sure it's because they are so busy though which is why they need more staff!

OP posts:

Jaxhog · 17/05/2017 21:10

At least find out as much as you can about the new job, then weigh up pros and cons again. But losing the commute and the pay rise would be hard to resist for me.

Go for the interview at least. you don't have to decide until they offer you the job.

YouWhatMate · 17/05/2017 21:10

I only read the first line of your post. No, you should not change job purely for more money if you don't want to.

That was an easy one. Next?

Pebbles17 · 17/05/2017 21:11

Absolutely ditch the commute, as others have said, I would take a pay cut to ditch that commute let alone a pay rise!

Before commencing AL, my commute was 3 hours a day and whilst I managed it at the start of my role ( 4 years ago) , towards the end it become a complete monster.

No brainer for me.

JanetBrown2015 · 17/05/2017 21:12

You need to move jobs and getting a shorter commute and big pay rise makes it a no brainer.

Too many women don't take risks with work and that is one reason that they tend to earn less than men.

I often think one of the main reasons I earn more than other women is I've taken those risks. Yes it can feel like jumping off a cliff at times but it tends to pay off.

alphajuliet123 · 17/05/2017 21:17

I agree with everyone else, go for job 2 just for the lack of commute and see the pay rise as an extra bonus. I took a pay cut to be able to walk to work and save 2 hours a day. It will change your life, seriously!

YouWhatMate · 17/05/2017 21:17

Okay I just saw about the 4 hours commuting. Ditch that job! That'll learn me not to read the OP.

scarletmonkey · 17/05/2017 21:18

Job 2 without a doubt
Im currently applying for a job closer to home that is 3k less than I earn now because I have a shitty four hour commute. Go for it!

Original poster

BluebellGal · 17/05/2017 21:19

Yes JanetBrown I am risk averse- I'm worried I won't be as happy in new company / role. It is a gut feeling that is holding me back. It's a big risk for me if it all goes wrong as I'm the breadwinner and like I say we have no savings. However I am confident in my abilities and I do know exactly what I will be doing in new job and know I can do it well. Don't mean to sound big headed but I have been doing this type of work for a long time now.

Re future, I think I would like a more senior role in 2/3 years time

It's really strange but motherhood made me more passionate about my career and determined to succeed. I loved my mat leave but was also happy to be back at work. I just feel that if I'm going to spend time away from my family i need to make it count!

OP posts:

anotherdayanothersquabble · 17/05/2017 21:20

Move!!! It's logical! You can explain on your CV if you ever have to. Even with promotion prospects in your current company it could take several years before you reach this increase. Do it and book a holiday!!

Original poster

BluebellGal · 17/05/2017 21:23

Just read my message back about making every second count and the 16 hours of commuting each week (1 x day I wfh) is NOT time well spent is it?!

It is a no brainer isn't it?! I'm going to make that application

OP posts:

DancingLedge · 17/05/2017 21:30

Original poster

BluebellGal · 17/05/2017 21:35

Thanks everyone x
I do really appreciate your time, I feel much clearer now

OP posts:

NoSquirrels · 17/05/2017 21:39

Big market leader company will still be there to apply to if you decide later that the other company wasn't enough - but hopefully by that point you'll be in a more senior position, applying for a better job where the salary really justifies the commute.

Your DC are small. If you've already been making sacrifices like working in the evenings etc for your current role, you'll be able to cope with a bit of less than ideal organisational stuff - and you can work to improve systems in a smaller more dynamic company more easily than in a corporate behemoth.

I could be biased, but I actively sought to leave a large company (once I'd milked them for maternity pay ) when I wanted to improve my career prospects, looking for a smaller firm to get stuck into. No regrets.

Also, do think about when your DC are school-age. Even with a SAHP it is useful not to be hours and hours away for all the assemblies/class reading cafes/award ceremonies/ random performances that your DC will beg you to try to attend - one parent is never enough! Good for bonding with other parents too if you can pick up or drop one day ir so a week.

Original poster

BluebellGal · 17/05/2017 21:50

Thanks nosquirrels - your advice about big versus small companies resonates with me completely. V good advice

DC not at school yet so I've not even thought about all of this yet but can definitely see how things will get harder, not easier! I have a fab DP who is not a SAHD but has flexible hours and works from home and is amazingly supportive of me

OP posts:

NoSquirrels · 17/05/2017 22:04

Good luck with the application!

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