Feeling really fed up tonight. I've always hosted play dates for both my DC quite regularly - DD is 10, and DS about to be 9. Both had a friend round today.
I just feel that this afternoon's play date is the straw that broke this camel's back and I just don't want to do them any more.
All started well. Then the following:
- DD disappears upstairs for ages - I go and check and find her grizzling because her friend is playing with the boys too much.
- DS and friend go in garden - DS kicking ball around our small but high fenced garden and despite promises to only kick in one direction ball ends up next door almost instantly. I tell him in no uncertain terms to stop kicking balls but next thing a further two balls have gone next door while I went to loo. Neighbour is plainly fed up by this as he always takes ages (several days) to return balls which is fine. We have a large trampoline, playframe and various garden games but DS repeatedly only wants to kick balls (always next door) despite having no interest in playing football or joining a football club any other time. Shed and balls usually locked due to balls issue but today he found key so I allowed him to kick on promise that he'd keep it away from neighbour fence.
- I walk into living room to find DS firing powerful (as in fires hard) nerf gun up living room. I tell him to stop but have to dash to telephone which rings and return to him still firing. Then he stops after a further talking to.
- Manage to stop DS showing his friend something with swearing in that he apparently found on you tube recently.
- DS completely accidentally knocks a model DD built yesterday - needs small repair when we can sit down and do it but entirely fixable. DD starts muttering about revenge and I warn her sternly against that.
- This is the biggie for me. DD grabs abandoned nerf gun and fires it at point blank range at DS. It hits him in throat and he's in significant pain - vivid red mark on windpipe and DD darkly gloating that she got her revenge. I lost it and sent her upstairs for next 40 mins and she became remorseful. Just thanking my lucky stars it wasn't DS's eye, or one of the friends.
- Ask DS and friend to tidy balls from garden ( they'd emptied an entire sack of ball pit style balls over garden). I chivvy and ask 6-8 times whilst dinner is ready - eventually they do it and come in.
- Mealtime. All seems to be going well and much friendly chat at table so I sat on settee. Get up 5 mins later to find that the entire carpet around table is covered in shredded tiny bits of bread as DD's friend had decided to tear the middle out of her sub roll and 'make dough balls' by rolling it between hands but DD joined in and pretty much two large bread rolls were all over floor.
Both guests hid from their parents at home time and all I could think was 'please please just go'. Not that they'd done much wrong - it was nearly all my own two DC.
To put in context, this is first play date they've had in a couple of months mainly because my Dad is very unwell and probably won't be with us much longer and I frequently make urgent dashes to be with him so I avoided play dates. But then I thought it'd be nice for the children to have one and I ought to make the effort. I feel such a mug, and I feel like not bothering any more. I realise that most is quite minor stuff and v normal but the nerf gun thing could've been very serious. I don't want to overreact but I feel cross that my two behaved so badly. I'm feeling they're spoilt.
In the summer we put up a 14 foot pool and host loads of play dates. I just don't want to do it any more. I'm always positive and happy but after today I just feel so fed up with trying to do it all, to get rewarded by this crap behaviour and unnecessary stress. I never have a minute to myself with working, caring for parents and the DC who each do 3 clubs a week.
So WIBU to put an end to play dates for the DC?