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AIBU?

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Original poster

Would this bother you?

33 replies

OverrSensitive · 10/05/2017 22:45

I mentioned to DH that I may get up early and go to the gym in the morning but I have arranged to meet my dad at 10am and he is an hour away so in reality unless I wake up early I won't have time.

He just went to bed and said: "You are going out early in the morning aren't you?" I said I didn't know and he looked disappointed and said: "well are you going out or shall I?" I asked why it mattered and he said: "it's nice for me that's all!"

I get that it's sometimes nice to have the house to yourself but I resent being made to feel like a nuisance or in the way in my own home. It's upset me but he doesn't seem the issue. Would this bother you?

OP posts:
Hisnamesblaine · 10/05/2017 22:51

I don't get it...... if you weren't going out early surely you'd both just be sleeping until such times were you do get up? What does he plan you do in your absence?

Pinkheart5917 · 10/05/2017 22:51

Me & dh do tell each other what we're doing.

Personally people that say well I might do x,y,z if I get up on time annoy me. Alarm clocks are great for getting up if you want to do something

And your dh said " are you going out or shall I" so he wants to go out if your not? but as you don't know what time your getting up he doesn't know what his tomorrow will be like

user1493759849 · 10/05/2017 22:54

Is it just me or is anyone else utterly confused by the OP? Confused

Original poster
OverrSensitive · 10/05/2017 22:55

I asked him "why do you want me to go out what are you planning to do?" And he just ignored me and tried to brush it off then went to bed.

I don't see why it affects him I'll either be asleep or out at the gym, he will just be getting ready for work and having breakfast then leaving. It just made me feel like a nuisance and he clearly would prefer me out of the house for whatever reason.

I just feel like he's been a bit short and argumentative with me over the last week or so with no obvious reason.

OP posts:
Jupitar · 10/05/2017 22:56

I would of taken it that if you're not going out for a jog then he wants to. Do you have children so one of you needs to be home? I'm confused to be honest 😂

BackforGood · 10/05/2017 22:58

I'm a bit Confused too.
Is it just you 2, or does one of you need to be in the house for dc (or other caring responsibilities)?

Original poster
OverrSensitive · 10/05/2017 23:00

It's just us two so basically he was saying if I don't go out he will go out (as in to get away from me!)

OP posts:
HandbagCrazy · 10/05/2017 23:01

Unless there's a massive backstory here it wouldn't bother me.

Right now DH is away overnight with work. He told me months ago then we both forgot until Monday. I've approached tonight like a complete treat. Nothing wrong with wanting some space.

Original poster
OverrSensitive · 10/05/2017 23:01

Whether I go out or not has no bearing on what he can or can't do.

OP posts:
Original poster
OverrSensitive · 10/05/2017 23:02

I understand wanting some space but he had the day off today and I was out all day, we aren't in each other's pockets and he is at work all day tomorrow then out socialising tomorrow night and Friday night without me.

OP posts:
DaviesMum · 10/05/2017 23:02

He wants a wank, probably. They always do. Sad

AnnieAnoniMouse · 10/05/2017 23:02

Sounds like he's planning on inviting someone over if you go to the gym or going to meet them elsewhere if you're not. He's been different lately...doesn't sound good.

Whisky2014 · 10/05/2017 23:04

I agree with Davies

pangolina · 10/05/2017 23:05

It wouldnt bother me. Me and OH both like our own space. Sometimes you just wsnt to be on your own.

Brogadaccio · 10/05/2017 23:07

His question ''well are you going out or shall I?'' is confusing. You'd both be going out. As you said, it's not an either / or opportunity to go out.

But don't you need to know before you go to sleep whether or not your are planning to see your dad and go to the gym because you'll need to set your alarm accordingly.

Original poster
OverrSensitive · 10/05/2017 23:09

I was going to set my alarm on my phone so I got up in time to meet my dad and then if I woke up earlier than that go to the gym. He was huffy because I wasn't definitely going to be out early.

Over the past week or so he's been more irritated with me in general, jumping on innocent comments I make and generally being more impatient and short tempered.

OP posts:
Sunshineandlaughter · 10/05/2017 23:10

I would have my suspicious hat on!

Maybe say you are going ahd then sneak back in quietly on the premise you forgot your trainers and see what it was he wanted to do so much without you there!

Brogadaccio · 10/05/2017 23:10

Yeh that sounds like he wants you to commit to leaving the house as early as possible

Sunshineandlaughter · 10/05/2017 23:11

Because if it wasn't anything dodgy then he could have same privacy with you just asleep!

Sunshineandlaughter · 10/05/2017 23:12

Or do you snore and he needs a lie in...?!

AlliHearMumMuumMuuuum · 10/05/2017 23:12

I also agree with Davies uniterrupted d.i.y time Wink

Original poster
OverrSensitive · 10/05/2017 23:14

I don't snore.

Exactly if I'm in I'll be asleep. I just think it's rude but it's that low level of rudeness that's difficult to pull someone up on and makes you doubt yourself

OP posts:
AlliHearMumMuumMuuuum · 10/05/2017 23:14

Hmmm but seeing your last update...sounds a little off tbh. Have you spoken to him about it?

Original poster
OverrSensitive · 10/05/2017 23:17

Haven't spoken about it yet. Usually he's really loving and kind, he's a bit more distant generally at the moment and snappy. The comment tonight threw me because usually he would always welcome my company, it's out of character.

OP posts:
Original poster
OverrSensitive · 10/05/2017 23:18

I know if I tried to say anything he would deny it as he wouldn't say why he wanted me out of the house, he just went to bed.

OP posts:
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